In other game news, Marathon season 2 has a lot of little quality of life improvements that have me more excited than Night Marsh does. Night Marsh seems neat too. Like if you play a lot of solo, Marathon is already a horror game. And making dire marsh night time kinda doubles down on that vibe.

Ninja gaiden 4 is a very weird game for me. Like mechanically, a lot of the gameplay speaks to me. Just a lot of finishers and stuff that feel a little more snappy than the original trilogy did. It's very cool. But I'm at like chapter 12 or 13, and the last few bosses have been fucking irritating.

Nebuchadnezzar is the drunkest name in the fucking world.

With great power, you can kinda do whatever the fuck you want.

One poop. All shapes and sizes.

On the toilet. Fear my asshole fell out. Too afraid to look.

Tired of spider-man piss-whining. Spider-whine. Piss-man. Bitch-made.

I'll miss AJ Brown. I wish the eagles didn't waste two years running inept offenses with him, but I'm glad they won a ring with him at the end of the day. And I'm a little relieved to not have to do another year of "what is Brown upset about this week?"

Had my first good slam skating this year. Was trying to front-shuv back-salad three-flip a double set and totally biffed the boner. (I hit a crack and flew off the board)

My company proudly employs 397 staff, and each one gets a full wrestling entrance every day they clock in.

Welcome your newborn to this splendid world with a firm handshake, and then send them on their way.

If you're gonna do a tribute to a friend who passed away...the "solemn, kinda contemplative reaction face" thumbnail just seems like a weird fucking choice. Like no disrespect to these guys, but just show a picture of Marc Johnson skating or something.

More like the "Mandalorian and Boohoo" because you'll be crying like a bitch when you see this movie. A fat little bitch.

I felt so resolute about being burnt out on marathon and not wanting to go back to it until some big changes were implemented...and telling myself it was time to get back to other games. Which I've done. But man...that fucking game is in my blood now.

I haven't eaten fast food in like three weeks and fuck this.

Me, when it's time to throw hands.

Director: that was great...but I'd really love a take where it looks like you're always sucking on some fucking chewing tobacco for some reason. Woody Harrelson: Sure.

When you yell at me, this is who you're yelling at...

Guy who votes for a rapist, "Looks like the other team doesn't know civility"

Me and the boys are gonna get the dicks kicked in at Clackerfacker's. You in?

the last big boy

I don't care how normalized this practice becomes, you're never gonna shake me from my belief that this use of this technology is completely fucking evil.

Captain America kicked a dog once. I saw it.

Was going to take a break from Marathon for awhile, but figured I'd finally try cryo archive since it's in ranked and they're letting people (inadvisably) solo queue for that. I was completely lost the entire time, which is probably the only reason nobody shot me. Seems neat. Neat map.

Wrapped up Pragmata tonight. Played a lot of sad-ass dad games over the years, and this was certainly one of those.

It's so nice when you get a new t-shirt and it's comfy and soft and it doesn't fuck Darrel Dervis, who used to be your best friend but power corrupts.

Come see the movie that critics agree "will be the death of me."

I'd probably give you some fairly different answers to this if you asked me a month from now (the truth is Bloodborne and DMC5 are constantly going back and forth in my head for favorite game). But it is interesting that I still remember Onrush. And I'm still pissed nobody played it.

hatching

Happy World Goth Day to that one Beaker in particular

I forget very important things all the time but my brain still remembers the voice of the guy who was like, "BIIIIIIG MUTHA TRUCKERS" for that stupid fucking video game's commercial. That's what my brain cares about.

what if it takes a crazy white boy to return the yakuza to their former glory...

🎵Sing us a song, you're the piano man Sing us a song tonight... When everythings made to be broken I just want you to know who i am🎵

I've never really been a WoW guy but this episode has Will talking about reasons why we fall off games with WoW being his example. But i think it could apply to many of us and our favorite titles. It's a good listen.

One time I was getting head and I panicked and ended up giving her a Last Ride powerbomb through my coffee table

*Watching Dorothy try to leave the land of Oz, talking with a mouth full of sandwich* There are tons of places like home. Fuck you talking about? Shithole farm. Fucked up by a tornado. There's a bunch of em. No big deal.

After going after this achievement and 170 overall hours put into the game (which is a shit ton for me and for what this game is)... I am so ready to stop playing Marathon now.

People getting together. Mucking around in the slop. That's what it's all about.

congratulations, graduates. i'm honored to speak at your commencement. this is a proud moment for you, your family, and your friends. the future is in your hands. and the most important task of the future is to feed the Gaping Maw (students start booing, one student yells "fuck the gaping maw")

Ezra Klein is talking cards

Me: Motherfucker got absolutely gazooked on that funko-pop. Straight up bitch senorita'd on that sly. A gang of "droogs": Shut up. Shut the fuck up. Idiot.

ernest goes ape shit

To the random purple shield who tried to rat around and kill me after I did all this shit solo on this fucked up Marathon contract: Putting your ass down was THE best moment I've ever had in this game. I hate you so much it fills me with joy.