Labour swapping Starmer for Burnham

Breaking: Scotland to boycott the knockout stages of the World Cup to protest Trump

When is Joani going to launch her leadership bid? Spanner mccolm promised me she was going places. Do it for President Xi Joani!

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We're pro getting rid of Starmer but anti every other Labour MP

Keir Starmer doesn't matter

This song is like life. Pointless and depressing. You keep hoping there will be a good bit, but it never happens.

We spent all our merch money on playstations and coffee machines and there's nothing you can do about it.

Once again there are no nihilist cabinet members. Shocking omission. But it doesn't matter. Nothing matters. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Does anyone know who's in charge of the Independence Thermometer now? I must have missed the announcement. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

We're for assisted dying, but against it being optional.

Estoy viendo 28 años después, que es un documental sobre el Brexit.

Why is nobody talking about Joani Reid, the honourable member for Beijing, as a potential PM? I thought she was going places.

Wes Palantir doesn't matter

I solemnly, sincerely and truly declare and affirm that I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to the eternal, unending and relentless void that will consume us all.

I already hate the next Prime Minister

We're pro getting rid of Starmer but anti every other Labour MP

11 years and 4 months ago.

He has nothing, it's like watching an ocean tanker trying to turn, all the political agility and nous of a drunk sloth, the reflective capacity of vantablack

How do I bet everything I own on Reform being fourth in Scotland by the end of this parliament?

Fergus doesn't matter

Farewell, Ash Regan, your legacy will live forever.

Here, are you sure you put the X in the right place? Maybe you wrote it in the wrong box? Maybe you didn't look closely enough? Anyway don't worry about it. Don't keep questioning yourself about it. I'm sure its fine. I'm sure you didn't make a terrible mistake. Don't give it another moments thought

turning up to the count and cheering when they read out the number of spoiled

There are no overnight counts but don't let that stop you from staying up til 4am, staring at the TV with a sense of existential dread.

Some people howl at the void. I take it for coffee. We're on first name terms. It always has great gossip about the abyss.

i love election day because political journalists shut the fuck up for 15 hours

good news, everyone

Best of luck to ALBA and Your Party in this week's Scottish Parliament election.

Elections don't matter. Nothing matters. But if you're not voting SNP or Green next week we'll have to consider a bathtub ferret situation.

Your Party doesn't matter www.thenational.scot/news/2601612...

How do we get JD Vance to campaign for Malcolm Offord?

The USA threatening to block the Strait of Hormuz

ABLA doesn't matter

China?

Beginning to think that the 'Board of Peace' might not be entirely legit.

2026 basically

Told you this year would be shite

Scientists be like: eat healthy and exercise and you’ll be punished with an extended lifespan

Told you this year would be shite

Already sick of this year