Could we all collectively agree not to comment on what people are eating? Snacking on my chicken mid-afternoon and got asked “How many meals are you having today?” When I explained protein needs I got told it was “a lot of food”. Just. No. My dietary needs are not up for discussion.

Getting a crash course in cock rings.

Compression packing cubes are a game changer! Fits beautifully in my backpack 🎒

Grumping at a colouring-in “game” because it dictates the colours to you. I want a purple snowman goddamit!

Wide awake at 6am, on a day I have no alarm. Rude.

Doin’ the whole family Christmas thing today. Wish me luck! Gotta suppress my Grinch for at least a few hours!

QOTD “Don’t give up on your meat penis.”

lets normalise .. its okay for someone to not want tinsel and decorations and "visual noise" where they rest

QOTD “I could have a weird wank about it.”

Getting drained of my life source once again 🩸 I have so many lines of enquiry open with the Docs that I cannot remember what this blood test is for 🙈

bad news, the coffee maker discovered how important it is to the household

reverse advent calendar where I scream a little scream into each tiny box and close it up tight

Officially at “I can see how the weather will be at the place we’re on holiday on weather apps” part of trip excitement! Hot. It’s gonna be hot.

Chosen all my clothes for holiday, trying so, so hard not to overpack. I suspect a few more things will sneak in!

This is top tier boyfriend behavior

An early Christmas pressie for you wrapped in latex…

I quit awful Pilates classes, dealt with the guilty trip of “whhhhhy? We’re like a family.” And they are STILL texting me asking why I didn’t come to class. Heck sake!

Today in Princess Treatment 👑 This was epic!

For a Pup, I do very often cat!😺

I’m gonna ask Santa for a teleporter

I am brimming with holiday spirit

This is something I and my fellow hyper literate types have a really hard time grasping. It’s frustrating to think you’re being really clear in writing, but still get wildly misunderstood because you’ve overestimated people’s literacy level. This is…a real problem online.

Did a faaaaancy upgrade to faaaaaancy twin seats on two of our four flights, because dealing with a stranger in my row of three and flying is more than my lil’ neurospicy brain can handle.

From cuddling to getting pounded face down in your pillows

Get a load of this. 😆

Cambodia visas have arrived. Next week! Squee! 🇰🇭

Fuck. Yes.

Thinking bad. Cock touching good.

Don Broco and Yonaka were fabulous last night 🎶

QOTD “Skin me like a bear, I’ll be your dramatic blanket.”

Couldn’t sleep because I was too excited about being able to sleep after having the heart monitor taken off 😅

Hard agree. I am literally leaving the country 😅

Yay slime!

I'll say "okie dokie" from time to time but i don't make it my entire personality

All I want for Christmas is for the worst people in the world to experience some consequences

Heart monitor comes off today. I can’t wait to be naked, have a bath and hopefully sleep well. I am so, so tired and itchy!

Dollars obtained for holiday. Temptation to make it rain is HIGH! 💸 🤑

Yay! My favourite day of December. This feels like an accurate representation 🎶🎼

Why are the cucks getting chairs? Make them stand.

The real question is not "Why is Bluesky so left-coded," the real question is "Why can't the right exist in a social media environment without algorithmic assistance, where people can ignore them"

Flat cola is my favourite.

i’m setting you free. i’m releasing you from the discourse

Somewhere in a Roman brickyard, around 1800 years ago, a fresh tile was drying ahead of firing - until a dog trotted straight across it. Centuries later, the tile has made it into a museum: not because of an emperor, but thanks to one dog who accidentally walked his way into history.🧵1/2 📷me

How is sleeping wearing a heart monitor Pup? Well, I’m so tired something being on my arm just made me jump. The thing was a tattoo.

Merry Spooky Christmas y'all!! #comicsky #vampirecomics #uriko neridacomic.com

It’s all about lines 🤍 www.patreon.com/laetitiamodel 📸 Beautiful photo by @edvdweijden_portraits taken during my stay in Utrecht Netherlands 🇳🇱

Managed to wear through my orthotic insoles - my osteopath hasn’t seen anything like it other than in professional athletes. All very amusing but I need them for holiday and don’t have time. Curses!

YOU CANNOT GRIND THE BONES OF YOUR ENEMIES INTO DUST TOMORROW IF YOU DO NOT DO YOUR STRETCHES.