Alive, good, I’m a girl dad (dad who is a girl)

4 and 3 finally angelic in mass, flipping through books, only needed to lightly shush 3 for singing quietly while she pretended to do mass too So of course 11mo has begun his Loud Era

You’ve just gotta be happy for the guy

Pope Leo: "Enough with words of hate, enough with insults, with bullying, enough with all those things that wage war between people, between communities, between countries.”

3yo spending breakfast lecturing us about a tiny rainbow dinosaur bug that can eat lattes. It lives in the zoo. Actually it’s a dinosaur bug so it lives in the museum. And actually it can eat 10 lattes

4yo calling it The World Cub

No thanks.

I let the 4yo watch the SCF w me and when he saw these Vegas ladies he said “oh look! Ballerinas!”

IT’S A SHUTOUT AND THE CAROLINA HURRICANES WIN THE STANLEY CUP!!!!! #SoundTheSiren #StanleyCupFinal

Stanley Cup champions

GOAT Eric Tulsky

"I'm so happy for these guys... This is what it's all about." Player-first, as always, from Rod Brind'Amour.

Let’s go canes :)

My wife gets so embarrassed when out dog sniffs our visitors' crotches. I think it's mostly because he's a Jack Russell and I have to lift him up.

Had friends over, fired up the inflatable water slide, the grill, the Caesar salad… summer fast approacheth

I have my phone background set to rotate pictures of the kids. It’s delightful to find random newborn pics of the 4yo etc. Otoh today in the rotation is a picture of the baby having an allergic reaction to some medicine, which I sent to the doctor

The Stanley Cup will be in the building on Sunday. Does Carolina get to take its lap? Here are three guys who can determine that. ⤵️⤵️⤵️ @theathletic.com

The 10mo on FaceTime with grandparents demonstrated biting his own shin and then shaking his head no. We love a boy who understands the rules

so i got laid off from elite prospects yesterday. but that doesn't mean i'm getting out of the takes business. i am more committed to takes than ever. so i hope you'll check out my new site for perfect takes. its called "perfect takes." thanks. perfecttakes.beehiiv.com

4yo consistently referring to the New England patriots as the “pastry-ots” which feels like an instant improvement

Pope Leo: "Every boat that arrives does not bring only migrants; it brings with it a question: what world have we built, if so many brothers must risk death to seek life?"

Commentary: I Work Very Hard, And I Would Like To Try Cake

Disappointing to see even Paul Simon is now promoting this awful technology.

Wow! Let’s see some photos of the good meals

Apparently tart cherry juice makes you make melatonin or something (there are actual studies that it can improve insomnia). Someone I follow said she makes tart cherry jello for her kids as a treat before bed. She’s playing 100-D chess. I will be doing that too

Yesterday 4 asked Kevin if any people were 12 feet tall. He told him that some people were very tall, but there had never been anyone as tall as 12 ft. “Ok but how do they get the twelve-foot skeletons?”

Piss and fart cake, anyone?

Pope Leo XIV’s first encyclical has been presented as a defense of humanity against artificial intelligence. But on a closer reading, the threat he identifies is not software development but the capitalist market logic that impels it.

Throwback to when a TV station in Iceland accidentally aired an episode of Teletubbies with subtitles from the Sopranos 👌🏼

Bedtime is NOT repealed in my house

It’s me

4yo and Kev made a haunted house

I don’t really watch basketball and I’m also not Episcopalian but I see stuff about wemby and think … welby?

3yo is getting a little better at being quiet during mass (I have demonstrated to her thinking thoughts without saying them out loud) but today tenderly grabbed my face, touched our foreheads together, and whispered “I want you to have a bloody nose”

3(!)yo, examining a $20 bill: I don’t like his face

Pope Leo: “The Trinity helps us to love everyone and everything because through it, we understand that every created thing is made for relationship. Yet, on the other hand, we learn why polarization, a dislike of diversity, and division lead to sadness, destruction, and an emptiness in the world.”

4yo declares 10mo “a mischief baby and a messy baby and a cute baby”

Cackling

Stephen Miller’s Forehead Vein Lunges Out To Catch Passing Bird

Friend Dishonorably Discharged From Navigation Duties After Missing Exit https://theonion.com/friend-dishonorably-discharged-from-navigation-duties-a-1825687837/

Odysseus murdering the suitors in slo-mo as "Time of Your Life" plays

Mine in the June 1, 2026 issue of The New Yorker

Other than takes I’d really consider warm not hot (let kids be bored, apologize to your kids when you mess up), I am suspicious of attributing every fussy baby mood to teething

tbh given the track record of recent American presidents when it comes to weddings trump could do worse to his son than simply not attend

@bakebythepound.bsky.social has done it again

dreamed i went viral for posting “if you want to be considered intellectually fruitful, you have to produce intellectual bananas”