peak yinzer is someone making a parking chair out of snow

...I would play this

production of The Muppet Show should not be dependent on petty vulgarities like “ratings” or “revenue.” it should be preserved as a vital function of american culture. it should have a taxpayer-funded budget rivaling the CIA

So does your Asian grocery! Just go in there and buy shit that looks cool, see what you can do with it. I've discovered a lot of fun stuff that way

Sucks finding out that a good chunk of the rest of the world thinks every American is a dumb Nazi.

Ich thynke but litel of a Mondaye bleake Tuesday grey and Wednesdaye eke Thursdaye Ich care nat for thee Yet Fridaye - Ich am yn love [twangy, jaunty lute arpeggio] Mondaye thou kanst fall awaye Tuesdaye, Wednesdaye, myne herte slaye No mirthe ys founde upon Thursdaye Yet Fridaye - Ich am yn love

IMPORTANT OLYMPIC NEWS: THE POLISH FIGURE SKATING TEAM HAS A PLUSH PIEROGI

Reactionary: it didn’t happen Reactionary: it happened but only a few people did it Reactionary: of course it happened everyone was doing it Reactionary: I blame the libs because they keep talking about it

I'm reading about the anatomical dynamics of breathing and it contains a delightful footnote re: the Sanskrit term ashwini mudra, which reads "Ashwin means 'horse,' an association derived from the impressive sight of equine defecation."

Saw a poster today at work advertising a pop-up thrift shop operating on Thursdays, with "vintage Y2K" styles. the inexorable march of time etc. etc.

I think often of the women in the Louis CK story—how they all left comedy and never went back, but he’s still going. It’s everywhere and it’s such a loss for them and for us—for things they’ll never make that we’ll never see.

I actually just sung out the full four lines in my head.

see also: Me Too has gone too far

I don't really like being online anymore not just because of the doom, I've been self-destructive my whole life and doom is where I live baby, but goddamn is it awful reading what folks are regularly posting about people they don't know. Please get invited to parties irl, I beg of you

Not me taking prophylactic ibuprofen. Guess I really am approaching middle age.

hate this. like ok well I'm not reading your article regardless of how important it seems to be or how interested I am in it because I don't want to have to pay $22 and have some website I don't care about email me twice a day for the rest of my life

briahna only knowing salt pepper butter olive oil explains everything

In my dissertation I wrote about the concept of the Golden Cage. People who hoard power are desperately miserable, trapped by their own minds in a system built on the myth that any of this is good for anybody. Anyways he just tweeted it out

"This Asian-inspired pasta is really amazing! I served it to friends, and they really liked the sauce" well yeah otherwise why would you blog about it just once I want a blurb for a recipe blog to be like "I served this to my kids and they fuckin hated it"

starting a TikTok trend where people delete TikTok

officially coining the term death pervert to distinguish the bad evil perverts at the government from the good perverts at the furry conventions

Just a pound of refined sugar can fuck up a whole truckload of wet concrete and the damage won't be apparent until it's poured and cured. French Anarchists used that trick when they were trying to sabotage prisons being built in the 70s. And that's today's French history lesson.

Tonight is my third yoga class in 24 hours. I am gonna be Wolverine come September.

Every single one of you should try to find samadhi and discover that your reward is being one of my cats. These furry little assholes are so goddamn spoiled. They don't have to have thoughts. They just vibe and do whatever and someone cleans up after them and feeds them and cuddles them regardless.

this is just natural selection my man

This is straight up Hybrid Theory worship. Especially at the end. You'll see what I mean. #NowPlaying

a playlist called “lofi beats i fucked your dad to”

Plants scream when you eat them cuz they're excited about your gut health

welp it’s time for me to put my brain in a bowl by the bed so it can soak overnight

he was a gross of Joyce all on his own

Centrist liberals need to get a fucking grip, man. Progressives are out there CLEANING CLOCKS and they still want to force these middling center-right establishment dingbats who have been consistently losing for my entire lifetime.

Don't kill your dandelions! Dandelions are one of the earliest flowering wild plants and queen bumblebees coming out of hibernation depend on them. No queen bumblebee survival = no nests = no more bumblebees. #SaveTheBees

for instance, this one just got a manicure

what in the 2000s is going on over at Dolls Kill velour Juicy tracksuits? bedazzled Playboy Bunnies? must we

listening to Forty Six and 2 while dangling off the side of a skyscraper makes Alex Honnold the only cool Tool fan ever

Do you remember when people were saying "I think my phone is listening to me, i'm getting ads for stuff I spoke about" and people said "They arent listening to you, they're just this good at predicting your interests"? Well, it happens they were doing exactly that. www.cbsnews.com/news/google-...

“Education is for the student’s benefit, not for the benefit of their future employer…students go to school not merely to acquire skills but to develop an entire social and intellectual life: to have something good and to have it forever” @thepointmag.bsky.social thepointmag.com/examined-lif...

KLUCK IF YOU BUCK

I'm actually convinced you all love me so until I am explicitly informed otherwise I cannot relate

Haven't heard this but am hype for Gesaffelstein getting flowers

Just as a temperature-taking experiment-- how many of you would like to try yoga, but haven't? Why not? What would make you feel more comfortable in a yoga class?

Men started hitting on me when I was 13. GROWN men. Not 20 year olds. 50 year olds. My mom had to go over to an adult man at the LeMont once and hiss "SHE IS 16!" because he was openly staring at my legs.

Men, ask any woman -- ANY woman -- how old she was the first time an adult man hit on her, harassed her, hollered at her. I was 10!

Update my mom knows what fedposting is and used it in a sentence.

At least, I /assume/ I am not hurt. We'll see how I feel in a couple hours/tomorrow 😅

Walked to the Walgreens and back and only ate shit once, so I'm counting that as a win. It was a pretty spectacular fall, too. Slipped around for 5 business days before falling flat out on my back and flinging the shit from my bag in an impressive arc above my head. (I am not hurt.)

reposting both for underlying insight and for solid use of "zugzwang"

I dream of a world with fewer fuckass bastards in it