The ratio of day to night capsules in Lemsip is all off. When I'm ill I want to curl up in bed and sleep, not pump myself full of caffeine.

The mouse in the Gruffalo stories comes across as a bit of a twat.

Thank you the baby Jesus… for everything 🙏 💞 #christisking #christmas #manger etc

Saying you "slept like a baby" is such a fucking ridiculous phrase. Unless of course, you mean you were screaming the house down 20 times during the night, and also pissed and shit yourself into the bargain.

This is a model for what actual masculinity should be. Men don’t need to spend more time in caves beating their chests with other men; they need to take their daughters to a meaningful thing and talk to them about it. Relatedly I think the biggest cure for toxic masculinity is platonic women friends

Christmas giveaway time! I've got a 2026 Calendar in need of a good home. For a chance to win it just click Follow/Like/Retweet (and if you can spare a couple of quid a month & want to encourage me, sign up to my Patreon.com/happytoast - but that bit's not necessary to win)

As a Brit, I find it disappointing that the Grinch has replaced Ebenezer Scrooge as the "anti-Christmas" character.

It's not slaw you pretentious wanks, it's coleslaw.

@manmademoon.bsky.social that Rogue Trooper cast list, you had us at Alice Lowe!

This is absolutely fucking bananas the way that these people are *so close* to getting it but still manage to miss it by a fucking mile.

All the kids in Stranger Things would almost be in their 60s now.

Bring Johno home! #nffc #johnsonin

Goes without saying but going to anyway, that orange septic twat trying to sue our BBC can fuck right off back to his shit hole country.

Do do do, Britt Assombalonga. Sometimes it's the simple ones that stay with you #nffc

Important reminder

www.theguardian.com/football/202... Poor form Brighton, poor form.

If bagpipes were English the Scots would take the piss relentlessly.

We never do well against Moyes sides, Everton at home was always a defeat on my list, obviously don't want it to be by three but it is what it is. We've got almost a whole side of injuries and now is when it'll catch up with us. Let's hope they come back and stay fit #nffc

Peace Award, this World Cup can fuck off. They didn't even suck up this bad to the dictatorship of Saudi Arabia, but the US dictator isn't sharp enough to work it out. Plus, far too many teams and games, it'll be shit until the last 8.

Fuck the Eurovision contest and fair play to the countries that have done exactly that.

This reminds me of my favourite little factoid about hedgehogs. They used to be called 'urchins' in English, so a sea urchin was a sea hedgehog. In Welsh, a hedgehog is a draenog, and a sea urchin is draenog môr... a sea hedgehog.

We kept the receipts. These comments, taken together, paint a picture of the man he is today.

Great culture can save lives. Literally. Amazing letter in today’s @thetimes.com about Tom Stoppard

If divorced dads whose kids don't see them could go back to dressing up in superhero outfits and climbing up buildings instead of ushering in fascism I think we'd all be better off quite frankly.

Fuck me it's changed around here! Where's all this modern stuff popped up around Nottingham #nffc

Steve Penna breaks down the stack in his talk: ✅ Taming "BLE Callback Hell" with Coroutines & Structured Concurrency ✅ Fully shared iOS/Android UI via Compose Multiplatform ✅ Room KMP + custom KSP plugin cut DB work from 5 hours to 10 mins 🤯 www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOQM...

I'm travelling up Thursday for the game and looking for somewhere to park probably between 5 and 7, happy to pay and don't mind a walk, some sort of multi story would be fine, any recommendations please? #nffc Been awhile since I was able to go to a home game!

I remember commenting on an article on The Athletic a while back to someone that said we should sell Williams as he'll never be premier league quality that he'll come good with the right management, BAM! #nffc

Been saying how noticeable the improvement in his English is, that'll only make him an even better player! #nffc

First on Match Of The Day, never thought I'd live to see the day #nffc

You'd struggle to find this many cnuts in one photo on pornhub.

When I arrive at the party

The real BBC bias story, narrated by Anna Ford

The most hilarious thing about the far right is how afraid they are of imaginary things. They're all "Grr I'm an alpha male but London is so scary tho" "1000 hobbits will descend on your village" Or some nonsense.

Get fucked, you melt. In The Night Garden is a masterpiece. Along with million other things nobody else would do. 'Current affairs' yeah, like your house in Clacton? Wanker. You are, and always have been, a cultural traitor.

Okay, I can't let this one go. I live in Ireland, not the UK, but the use of this image by a supposedly socialist party is so stupid and offensive, I'm going to get stuck in. Let me explain to you why any experienced illustrator/designer could have stopped you making so many miserable mistakes. 1/

Every ad now

My favourite book used to be Ice Station Zebra by Alistair Maclean. This has now been comprehensively ruined by the latest Alan Partridge series, and I cannot ever admit to liking it again without people doing Steve Coogan impressions at me.

Remembrance Day is now dominated by performative nonsense. You don't need a house sized poppy and a model spitfire to show you care about the sacrifices made for the country. Where's the sense of dignity and the quiet respect gone?

SUPERB and angrily unvarnished response, by former BBC chairman, Lord Patten. "I don't think that we should allow ourselves to be bullied into thinking that the BBC is only any good, if it reflects the prejudice of the last person who shouted at it." ~AA

I've been a member of IMDB for over 21 years now, it's insane how old the internet is. #imdb

Well as frustrating as a draw was when we "should" have won it that's still a reasonable point. The other games should be slightly easier and the squad hopefully less injured. Abbott looked good again, Yatesy back to his old self too, more positives than negatives #nffc

Fuck off Spotify, "watching" podcasts is telly not radio, stay in your lane.

Got my Malmö tickets and I'm as excited as fuck! Not been for over five years I think. Give it another five and hopefully I'll be taking the boys with me too! #nffc

Pretty sure there is a Live Love Laugh one on the other wall.

I'm Dyches first three games we've had all the flavours and personally I think it'll be a tough season but he can keep us up and that's all the matters. #nffc

Watched the highlights and draw seemed fair even though we massively didn't get the rub of the green. Ball not out for the corner, but should have defended said corner, but last goal looked technically offside. That said a great finish that for footballs sake you wouldn't want chalked off #nffc