“Leg Room and Legumes” is the tagline for my new commercial carrier, Bean Air

Current* conditions near Kenosha, WI:

today was my first leg day without Jane Goodall

I was the shadow of the vocals slain By the great Osbourne on the Crazy Train

What else can be said about Jackie Young at this point ??? What a cold cold breakdown and contested lay.

The Majesty of the Seltzer Cat

They should publish a beautiful Adrian Chiles coffee table book that's just the headlines

Breaking Pete Hegseth’s concentration on his set of quarter-rep push-ups by saying “herstory”

The US consumer is completely drained, and what did they do with all that cash they extracted from us? Lit it on fire to make a machine so advanced its the first ever computer that can't do math and spent the remaining scraps buying the media and presidency so people couldnt be mean about them

My Wallflowers cover band that sings about cloning wrestlers is called Three John Cenas

Current* conditions near Chicago, IL:

Does this count?

Hearing rumors the Mariners will have Jack Perconte throw out the first pitch, and I gotta say, I approve!

Ma$e & Dixon — Thomas Pynchon’s fictionalized, sometimes surreal account of the three-day road trip rapper Ma$e and college basketball star Juan Dixon took to watch Allen Iverson’s Philadelphia 76ers play the heavily favored Los Angeles Lakers in Game 1 of the 2001 NBA Finals.

Microsoft shoved their AI Copilot into everything in Windows 11. Which lead to an increase in Windows 10 use. So they announced they'd stop support for Windows 10, but its usage was still strong. So they started to put Copilot into Windows 10. Windows 7 use is surging 5x now. AI is product poison.

Blame the bad breakup with Gene Keady

Charles Bronson “Pinchot”

Zero Dark Barbie 2: Extraordinary Kendition

counsel: she called u Mr Boombastic shaggy: that’s correct counsel: & on the night in question she said you’re fantastic *hushed sidebar discussion, rustling papers* shaggy: that’s correct

Wendy’s Dave Thomas once dangled me off a balcony & called me a “nothingburger”

many cringe posters suffer from groans disease

If you can buy a forever stamp you have generational wealth

My pitch is a digressive, Sebaldian novel narrated by Zach Lowe about professional basketball, life in CT, fatherhood, and 90s television. On page 260 of 275, the narrative reaches a crescendo and the narrator says "BOBBY MARKS, HOW ARE YOU?" then immediately resumes his ramble. Marks never speaks.

G’orca

“A second Gorka has hit the government”

My newest album of all-guitar music just came out in June and is still available for you to stream/buy, even on this BandCamp FriDay!!! mikehuguenor.bandcamp.com/album/surfin...

"TGIF thank god it's Friday," I say getting in the car after a long week. "God can't help you now," says Urkel from the backseat with a gun.

That red brick building is Funston Elementary. They are gassing kids in their classrooms

Win John Prine’s Money

Taylor Swift

Mamet Okur

Glengarry Glen Rice

Well this leads to an uncomfortable question I think the electeds themselves are avoiding, who do we think the police will listen to?

[interviewing Bun B for the Atlantic] Is it true your name stands for Abundant Bass?

Can’t believe they’re putting Bari Weiss in charge of CVS

[scene from the Oscar-nominated 2026 film TIM, about how hard it is to be a tech CEO] TIM COOK: Tim Cook’s Apple, yes. But sometimes Apple cooks Tim. SIRI: It sounds like you want to cook an apple?

Only loosely related but I was thinking the other night how in the pre-internet days it would’ve been fun to start a rumor that Jesse Michaels of Operation Ivy was Al Michaels’ son

Matchbox, 30 September

Matchbox, 1October

Matchbox, 2 October

evening crowd: I wrote about convention centers, logistics, plastics, clothing, and cowboy boots for @defector.com:

NEW // Sales Tax Hike Would Fund Civilian Responder Expansion, Barring SPOG Obstruction By @amysundberg.bsky.social Via @theurbanist.org www.theurbanist.org/2025/10/02/s...

Cartoon of Ryne Sandberg giving Goose Gossage the bird from heaven

Prohibiting the generals from eating candy except for Mentos because those help with problem solving

"Do the wild thing" is a coLōcquialism