I’m currently in Frankfurt. I’m wondering if Frankfurters think Uisce beatha really does mean “Whisky for Life” or whether they just bloody love alcohol.

This is top shitposting.

Overheard on tram. Late Swiss German teenagers (speaking in Dialect) suddenly mentioning the book “The Art of Giving a Fuck”.

Channel 5 pitch: Gaff Swap. Rylan can live in an asylum seeker’s shared hotel room, and a former British Army interpreter from Afghanistan fleeing the Taliban can live in his home for a week.

Apple Weather: No rain tomorrow! I’ll cycle in to work then. Tomorrow’s weather:

*Takes a deep draw on the cigarette* Looks like Windows needs updating again.

Related: I am currently craving this from breadandwaterprintshop.com/products/eny...

It’s such fun. I made a Woman’s Hour one for exactly this reason

That’s an iiiiiinteresting topic for a Panini sticker album. #swisswrasslin’

🎵If you see a faded sign at the side of the road that says 24.14 kilometres to the…

I had a few loyalty cards stored on the Stocard app. Stocard has been bought by Klarna. If I want to see, let’s say, my Tesco Clubcard data (physical card left my wallet long ago), I now have to install this micro-borrowing app AND sign up for a Klarna account. Which is very hard to then delete.

The fashion line that screams “I want to speak to your manager”.

Lads, I’ve found the peak grumpy Baby Boomer opinion piece.

Totally normal thing in #Zurich happened earlier this week.

OH COME ON

NON, FRUITY MATE.

If someone in Glasgow said to me “Ahm gantin’ furra pêche”, I’d wonder why : 1. They have started using fancy French words 2. They are wanting to eat fruit And I’d definitely start to suspect that they’re actually an undercover English.

At this point, she’s basically William Wallace in trousers.

As my wife is watching #gntm - Germany‘s Next Top Model, it occurs to me that the theme music - Madonna‘s Vogue - is fundamentally incompatible with their Media Partner magazine… Harper’s Bazaar.

they made an ai game where you can talk to the patients but forgot to add in prompt safety controls

Ye gods, Threads is full of bots… and people that don’t read posts very closely before replying anyway.

If Last Tango in Paris was Made in Cologne…

@profanity.accountant Hallo!

Is PubMed b0rked again?

My Rock? 30.

Google Co-Scientist AI cracks superbug problem in two days! — because it had been fed the team’s previous paper with the answer in it pivot-to-ai.com/2025/02/22/g...

Having to finish off a cross-linking book chapter by the end of today, and yeah, there’s better coffee by far, but I always end up WFStarbucks rather than WFH.

Sure sounds like Kemi Badenoch is speaking for Shell - quoting their figures - rather than for “the people of Britain”#PMQs So much projection of her own insecurities and incompetence in her accusations.

It’s going to be pig heart that they use, isn’t it?

A reader writes… “The last time I made a submission to Private Eye was in 1968, when I was 15 years old. I received this wonderful response which I still treasure:”  JOHN CLIVE

I mean, it’s just rude to charge that when it says £2.29 on the label.

FFS, that’s not Avenir, it’s Helvetica Bold, and it’s not Roman, it’s Sans Serif #orrelfussli

Swiss consumer products as as Glaswegian epithets. Awrite turtle honey baws

@limmy.com Mah name’s Dr. Wolfgang Stefinger, and ah lost three years of my life on…

LinkedIn is cool because I was always wondering what it would be like if people I sort of knew wrote mediocre press releases about themselves.

SIMPLY HAVING A

I am getting obsessed by the Hot Cholera - To Go! at the Zurich Operahaus’ Christmas Market.

Floaty bin bag ✅ Sellotaped on menu ✅ Tinny sound system with 90s hits ✅ Chain smoking staff with Santa hats ✅ Untidy plastic pallets prominently visible ✅ Prominent Laurent-Perrier branding ✅ Mmm. Luxury. I guess if I were LP’s brand manager and saw this, I’d be quite pissed off.

It’s a PRIVATE COTTAGE DO NOT PARK HERE. But its’s also a public road. Ah, the town of Knutsford in Passive-aggressiveshire, England.

This seems a poor reflection on Hotel management more than anything else. For me, 7/10 is an A grade. Why punish the staff / guilt trip paying guests like this?

I’ve always wanted to get my work published in “Journal Name” - its Impact Factor of {Missing String Entry Table} is hard to beat.

Yum. Cholera bun.

For some reason, this feels slightly impersonal. #linkedin

Doctor Who day, and I’m thinking about my friend Keith Carter who once saw Tom Baker emerging from a phone box in Edinburgh and shouted “Been anywhere nice, Tom?” and got a resounding “fuck off!”

Today’s poem is called ‘The Importance of the Oxford Comma’.

Ozurdex is a slow-release steroid implant that gets placed with an injector into the virtrous of the eye to treat things like chronic diabetic macular oedema. Is this disclaimer implying there might be a new way of getting it into the eye?

“Oh Ted how I envy you, such a simple blissful existence you live, free from the torment of tax on assets above three million” #TaxTheRich

it made me sad for a moment to think about how there are probably people out there that don't know there is a whole fake netflix site full of the fictional movies and shows referenced within movies and shows nestflix.fun/the-rural-ju...