My best friend from law school wrote this, and I’m so proud of her

My cardiologist told me to eat a bag of chips every day, I’m not even kidding (or pickles, it’s for the sodium)

Derek Guy 🤝 Stacy London “You can wear whatever you want of course, but I can tell you it looks bad.”

Okay but why did yall tell me to get here at 7:30 if your lobby isn’t open yet

The expansion of Bucees outside of Texas and across the United States is the perfect example of the overconsumption problem in America today. In this essay I will

Who recommended the “Sold A Story” podcast? I’m riveted, I cannot wait to report to my dyslexia therapist mother! Was it @jaconthebrazos.bsky.social ?

Using AI for everything in your professional sphere is building your entire career on sand

One thing a podcast will never do is make me empathize with a Silicon Valley mogul. Baby the only thing we have in common is autism

The L’Oréal Infallible Three Second Setting Spray is the best setting spray I have ever used in my life I walked 7 miles in NYC AND saw a game at Yankee stadium, and my makeup did not budge the entire time It’s like hairspray for your face. Beyond worth $11

At Walmart in 2002, my brother smacked me across the face with a pork tenderloin so I threw oranges at him. Our mortified mother rushed us out in tears, grounded us for a month, and banned us from going grocery shopping. That is my only memory of Walmart from the aughts. AI could never recreate that

you know those rules aren’t something the US made up right

Little Rock and it’s not even close It’s the least real place I’ve ever been and I LIVED there for 3 years

At least now I have one thing to look forward to during the Super Bowl, as a Cowboys fan: shaking ass to Bad Bunny

EVERYONE STOP EVERYTHING Mychal the Librarian is hosting the Reading Rainbow revival!!! reactormag.com/reading-rain...

“Well, I don’t know any Bad Bunny songs!!!” Babe, it’s September. The show is in February. I believe in you.

Walker has a new favorite food: broccoli cheese soup

Okay I’m really feeling called to get into hockey this season The boy aquarium? Yeah I like it there

Bonnie is refusing to come inside. This phenomenon is known as “flat basset”

Lmao my husband just called me a “basset hound aesthetician”

Me: I love your nails! Gracie: thanks! Gel! She turns 5 tomorrow. An icon

The lion doesn’t concern herself with the opinions of anyone who can’t take off their own bra while driving

Get in girlies, we’re going to the American Girl store for Gracie’s fifth birthday!

Just saw a red streak on my white & tan dog’s fur and started to panic thinking it could be blood… it’s marinara

Don’t ever ask me if your cowboy copper hair looks good because I will be forced to tell you the truth

I never knew I needed to hear Cardi and Lizzo cover Four Non Blondes until right now but it’s healing me

Back in the 90s, a neighborhood friend invited my 9YO brother to a fall carnival at his Baptist church. While there, 4 adults got my brother in a room alone and traumatized him forever by repeating that he was going to hell for not being “saved.” We were cradle Catholics attending Catholic school.

Do I have to update my iOS before the rapture?

A pop up box on Tylenol dot com

My 70 YO father in law, who supports this administration, showed us his special wooden coat hanger he accidentally took home from church after altar serving for Monsignor Smith in 1965 at Our Lady of Perpetual Suffering. He was in the navy for 42 years and he took that hanger to war with him. Twice

Sometimes when I have the sads, I pet Walker’s ears and feel better He has the softest ears in the universe

Best birthday present of all: my mom said I look skinny 😭

One of my best friends sent me the perfect birthday present 🥹🥰

💕 make sure you refill your medication organizer thingy today sugar 💕

This has been the best birthday week of my life

Adult book fair is incredible!

Current favorite new lil treats

The peanut butter and jelly M&Ms are absolutely delectable

My mom: “the thing about Walker is, just when you think you’ve got him all figured out, he’ll surprise you!”

Happy birthday [email protected]

The whole “don’t wear red if you don’t want to be MAGA presenting” is certainly something I have a nose ring, neck tattoo, 9 earrings, and a chest piece- pretty sure I’m okay wearing a red dress

My library branch since college is closing next week because the city of Dallas cut the funding for it, and I’m absolutely devastated

As you cancel streaming services, here is a casual reminder that only 16% of Americans read for pleasure anymore, and your local library has hundreds or thousands of books you haven't read. They would love to see you stop by and renew your library card.

Wheeeee I have to go back to the cardiologist

Got my flu and Covid shots!!

Sometimes when I get really depressed about the state of the world, I wonder who Hollywood’s current Epstein is and which of our fav celebrities frequent that establishment

I think I left my inhaler in my hotel room in NYC I never lose anything! And it’s my most expensive med. And, I really need it 😭

I just wrote a spooky season movie watch list on the fly- 55 movies off the top of my head lol

I love when people ask what I’m doing for my birthday I’m EATING

[whispering to George W. Bush meme]: a second bouquet has been delivered

3️⃣6️⃣