my book is eligible (see my pinned)

meghan trainor has one of the most versatile pop voices on the planet and she’s making headlines because people are mad that she’s losing weight this planet is fuckin’ stupid

kinda feel as though if I haven’t delivered at least two interesting/funny links and a cat video to my wife’s phone before she wakes up I have failed as a husband

excuse me but the robot boy stole your ship — with thousands of souls aboard — to fly home and see his dad and once you regained control from this abject mutiny you didn’t disassemble the robot boy and fire the pieces into the sun you put the robot boy back in command

I couldn’t get out of bed yesterday. I tried twice and failed both times, crashing to the floor. It got worse: Soon, I couldn’t move at all. Thanks to the EMT folks who managed to get me into an ambulance, the hospital staff who patched me up, and my amazing wife who took care of everything.

I know the president watches a lot of TV but do you think that he saw when Sheldon and Amy won a Nobel prize and it makes him crazy

psst this is a secret we don’t want the media to find out: if we went after white collar criminals with a fraction of the resources we spend locking up minorities from disadvantaged areas, we’d have a lot fewer disadvantaged areas

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: Jean-Luc Picard is the worst captain ever.

between SEVERANCE and PLURIBUS it really seems like Apple is repurposing THE PRISONER as different TV shows

I sent this video to my mother with a note this morning that said ‘perhaps your generation should have been euthanized’ youtu.be/nJBDcb7kq_g?... #margenews

there are times to listen to your big sister and this is one of them

Wow crusherconvo had me on, then @theoliviayoungers.bsky.social and now @ineti.bsky.social? This is great! I want more people to hear those people! Woodang!

I don’t know what this says about society or what it says about me but here goes: I have a concealed carry permit for firearms in Arizona. But in actual practice, I never leave the house without a good camera and microphone. What does this mean?

politics aside I hope john gets betterman

There are a million reasons I love Robert Zemeckis but one of them is that he refuses to shoot establishing shots. If it doesn’t push the story forward, he’s not interested. Drone footage is often used for clumsy establishing shots — breathtaking visual verticality, but genuinely meaningless.

Downtown Phoenix may be the worst place in the world to socialize and do fun stuff with friends because it’s mainly just corporate offices. It’s dead. It’s different (and much better) in older cities that had to build up and out, like Philadelphia. I didn’t get a driver’s license until I was 28.

As of this morning, Starbucks workers across the country are officially ON STRIKE. And we're prepared for this to become the biggest and longest ULP strike in Starbucks history. Say #NoContractNoCoffee with us: DON'T BUY STARBUCKS for the duration of our open-ended ULP strike! $SBUX

My theory is that it’s always 3am on the internet. The stuff you would never think is funny during the day is something so hilarious you need to watch it six times at 3am. Your brain may be right but deploy the idea from a safe distance at another time. At a 3am you’ve slept in front of.

I’m not a normal person but if I heard my name was in the Epstein files I would be in DC with an accordion and a PA system demanding the full release of the files that would exonerate me via increasingly irritating songs about lawmakers

So happy that Olivia was up next on the podcast after me! She is a genuinely good person and I hope her episode goes well!

@michaelianblack.bsky.social my beautiful wife is asking me how we’re supposed to get through the release of the Epstein files with no new HIGNFY until 2026 do we just FaceTime with you and Amber and Roy or what our cats can be your teammates, they’re both good at lie-curious

🚨 Ensign Riggs is not dead! I will be sitting down with @theoliviayoungers.bsky.social from #StarTrekPicard this week! If you have any questions, please record at crusherconvo.com or email me at [email protected]! #Interview #StarTrek #Podcast

weird thing to say about a show with a trailer that was generating Philip K. Dick vibes (or as I like to call them, dickvibes) — but I’m in

A reminder that this anti-trans panic is 100% bullshit and exactly none of our country’s problems are related to someone expressing their gender identity and everyone who isn’t a hate-filled weirdo knows it.

Do you know how hard it is to politically radicalize someone who joined a website to reply with the cry laughing emoji to the Trix cereal rabbit?

Quinn: Daria, you can't leave me here with those, those yuppies. Daria: Yuppies are from the '80s. Quinn: So what do you call people with funny outfits who talk about peace and love and stuff? Daria: Trekkies.

If you strip away the political vibes and keep it to priority alone, it’s still very hard to justify why ICE agents are getting paid but air traffic control is not.

I should infiltrate brofluencer insta and be like ‘ay yo I’ve got the one big trick into getting ladies to smile more are you ready ready READY for this no-fail technique neek NEEK here it is: an active and sincere interest in how they’re doing and finding ways to help works. every. time.’

Devo are officially Grammy-nominated artists. The band formed in Akron, Ohio in 1973. They are up for the Best Music Film (for concert/performance films or music documentaries) for their self-titled documentary, which premiered at the 2024 Sundance Film Festival. It's currently showing on Netflix.

"Right to work" is a euphemism for "giving employers the right to abuse workers."

hope I meet channing tatum one day so I can tell him how much we love jupiter ascending

Hey! I found some more wasteful government spending!

so not for nothing but there’s an angle of the Lego kit that looks fantastic but it’s just not what they’re using for most of the promo images

This is it.

democrats will flip a lot of seats if they take their constituents seriously and get to the bottom of why there’s no miles o’brien minifig in the new star trek lego set

Wonder why this scene looks so familiar... #WildlifeWednesday 🐦🐕

tom brady’s dog is a clone of his dead dog and I will not abide the filthy tleilaxu

I need someone to run the numbers on my hypothesis that those meidastouch videos are being shared by suburban moms at a terrifying rate

so there was this time back in 2025 when the news divisions of the universe went absolutely all-in on pleasing the president and made huge changes and spent insane money — while getting nothing of value from any of it yesterday’s results make many of those decisions a lot harder to explain

ken jennings out here with a KLF reference

bless mikie sherrill but I am pretty sure ‘governor of new jersey’ is just a title they make up to scare little kids it couldn’t possibly be a real job arguing with philly and nyc all day? this is like a hero-of-myth worthiness task not an actual real person’s 9-5

But what is @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social’s stance on professional paranormal investigation and elimination??!

well it seems that they can suck it

Normal People Don’t Want This Shit is running away with the vote tonight

when thousands of people are hungry, the black panthers will feed them if they’re lucky if there are no black panthers, there will be a symbionese liberation army to feed them you’re just starving people into direct contact with crazy motherfuckers and calling it great again

It’s Cuomover

BREAKING: Zohran Mamdani wins the New York City mayoral race, NBC News projects. nbcnews.to/4nIzNUC

Mamdani will win because I ate a piece of New York cheddar within ten minutes of polls closing you’re welcome, New York