[if Chuck Schumer replaced Liam Neeson in Taken] CHUCK SCHUMER: [on phone] I don’t know who you are or what you want, but I will find you and I will help you kill my daughter

"No matter how you feel about ketamine, its use is growing more widespread and it's important that educators understand how they could integrate it as a tool in their classrooms"

The Paris Match by Kate Clayborn is out today, and it is SO GOOD. www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/768412... (Disclaimer: I got to beta-read this for my 2 areas of expertise, "being American in Paris" and "how do earnest French learners sound," but I would love it and be promoting it regardless)

FYI: The Paris Match by Kate Clayborn is out tomorrow and is without a doubt, one of the best books I read this year. It was phenomenal and no one does character development quite like Kate.

I need a good, angsty, slump-busting romance. I’m starting to get that desperate feeling like I’m never going to read anything good again 😭

Never have, never will, and I will absolutely quit my teaching job (which I love) before anyone makes me

It pisses me off so much when I see those ChatGPT ads where someone gets advice for sticking to a running routine or opening a restaurant — all that information is stolen from folks who have done actual research studies, run trials, written blogs, published essays & books. Fucking thievery.

Of all the reasons to love historical romance, “heroine gets a whole new wardrobe” is simply one we are not talking about enough! Top-tier stuff right here!!

Taurus: Actually, Frankenstein is the doctor. The monster is you.

Congratulations to Michael B Jordan on his win for Sinners, and congrats to this Letterboxd reviewer of the movie for coming up with possibly my favorite dad joke on the internet

Last year I got to attend this incredible event where literary translators did readings and talked about their work to a huge receptive audience, and I was so in awe and jealous Today I got an email inviting me to be a speaker at this year’s same event

Just finished a fanfic* where a character states what I think is, metatexually, the basic requirement of all the best romance: that "impossible" doesn't stand a chance against "inevitable" And, like, this is it! Make me believe the love is impossible! And how it simply MUST thrive anyway!

“On research leave” (making Heated Rivalry-themed playlists to work out to)

my hot writing take is that playing with POV is neat and you can do what you want. present tense first! close third! first-person-direct-address with bits of omniscient third! anything is legal if you look good doing it!!

Sunday plans: 🖼️ Arnold Lobel

Yes, asking for consent is sexy: in fiction, asking for consent is also *character work*, anyone with questions may refer to Ch 13 of the below text

Two chapters in and I’m already obsessed. Simon is the gay spiritual successor to Richard from Act Like It, and I cannot tell you how much I needed that in my life 😂😂

I'm not interested in pragmatism for 2-7 hours after a Schadenfreude Event. It's like swimming after eating.

Why are we using the internet for ANYTHING but this

More Peter Darling news: The Spanish edition comes out on April 10 and is fully illustrated! ✨

Just tried matcha for the first time and… am I missing something? Is it supposed to taste like recently-cut grass and bitter regrets?

I don't want to say that finding out Trader Joe's has crumpets is the best thing that's happened lately but... have you seen what's been happening lately?

If they want me back they have to go fully Woke 2, sorry. Whole hog. I gotta be able to get an abortion there

It's usually pretty easy to keep my Romance Bsky and my Professional Bsky apart, until someone says "Fanon" and I have to decide if it's famous anticolonial thinker and psychologist Frantz Fanon, or a portmanteau of Fan Canon

If I had an enchanted sword, I would be really smug about people with regular swords

“Why Does Everything Make Me Nervous: a Memoir in 700,582 Parts”

Curious to hear what people are currently recommending as a “read this next” to people who are new to Heated Rivalry?

I go to a therapist to hear therapy-speak. I read romance to watch two believably confused humans mess each other up a bit. Let’s not mix up the two.

istg I’m about one “new ways we’re adopting generative AI” email from my employer away from quitting my job

Just hangin’ out at the US/Canada border with my Amtrak wine, my box of cheese cubes, and a fantasy novel. As one does.

Oh my god TWO DOLLARS for (imho) the best romance novel of the last 5 years? An absolute steal, is what that is

ngl, feeling a little smug about the number of people to whom I spoke aloud my prediction that Alysa Liu would win gold bc she was the only contender who truly didn’t care how well she scored

SO rude to have the women's hockey gold medal match and the women's figure skating long program on at the same time? the Sapphic Cutting Edge Dilemma, they call it

hey I just met you / and this is dopey / but I'm a white whale / so call me Moby

see below (not so much bc I like Malinin - I don't really - or because I dislike Shaidorov - I don't at all - but because the reality where Yuma Kagiyama, Adam Siao Him Fa, or even Cha Jun-Hwan got a gold medal was... so close)

Bad news everybody, figure skating is cancelled I just cancelled it 😤😤😤😤😤

The first in what is about to become a series of hand-knit sweaters inspired by Cat “sweaters and crying” Sebastian novels. This pattern is Inge by Le Knit, and I imagine it as one of the sweaters everyone passes around at Dooryard Books

update: I managed to rescue both Eric and Ryan (Ari Baran's Home Ice Advantage) as well as Alice and Van (Emily Zipps' Alice Rue Evades the Truth) yesterday. Sadly, Nick and Andy are still going through it, but I've been there with them before, they'll be ok

Trust me, the woman of academia are not at all surprised by the number of academic men orbiting Epstein.

I have somehow ended up at the low moment of all 3 romances I'm reading at the same time and, like... help! everyone is so sad! and I don't know which couple to bail out first! 😂

Prompt: reply to this with romance novel couples you think should be as much household names as Ilya and Shane are now

Rereading We Could Be So Good for the 50 quintillionth time, and wondering if it’s time to make space in my long-time, heavily-solidified “top 5 romances” list for this book

JESUS: Forgive them, Lord; they know not what they— {puts finger to earpiece} Sorry, Lord, I'm now being told they absolutely do know what they do

oh my god, HONESTLY

Birds seen today: 33 Canada goose 25 mallard 5 black-headed gull 25 redwing 5 song thrush 8 robin 43 carrion crow 1 blackbird 3 auras of wren 6 small brown and distant 14 tiny indeterminate flitters 6 quivering bush 4 fuck knows 7 come out of there and show your face you little bastard

I'm running a popular romance course at the University of Liverpool... but only if enough people sign up! Come and join us! www.liverpool.ac.uk/continuing-e...

I'll be writing my local library system to ask them to drop Libby and seek alternatives: do any of my more knowledgable followers know of other (AI-free) platforms out there for libraries to use?