This shit genuinely ruined my day

the burden of proof is on the people who just wiped out a grade school.

Sup chat this is Slouching Towards Bethlehem with your boy The Rough Beast, and it looks like today’s stream could be a big one, as some of you might’ve already seen there are rumors going around social media that the hour has come round at last, so we’re gonna get right into it

I think the more obvious ploy is that this is an attempt to get into the good graces of the psychotic warmongers of the "classic" Republican party. The kind liberals love to pretend were respectable and classy and nice.

With #Iran, I genuinely don't see how anyone comes back from this moment. Trump killed a foreign leader with the flimsiest of excuses, probably to boost his approval with hawks. This is the kind of thing that should get an appointment you a firing squad. The Ayatollah was a bastard but like. C'mon.

If Iran had a nuke I wouldn't give a fuck. I don’t care. Genuinely fuck off.

I have always thought Khomeini and Bernie Sanders look like the same guy.

Reminder that the richest man in the Roman Republic died after trying to fight Iran and doing such a bad job that they poured his own melted down gold down his throat to kill him. Here's hoping history repeats.

Sam Hyde is an adult band kid if the band only played Wagner

The only deal I would have been happy about

I found Longlegs really unscary and hard to take seriously, and it only occurred to me yesterday why. As someone who grew up completely divorced from Christianity in my house, I never believed in the devil. My frame of reference for Satan is Futurama jokes. I cannot take "hail Satan" seriously.

I'm becoming a reddit atheist guys I'm tired of hearing about Christianity so much

You can misbehave as much as you like in a circular classroom. The Teacher has no where to put you

Guy who knows nothing about history: Da Jews are the ones who did! Guy who knows a little about history: There is no force motivating all negative change, the world and history at large is chaotic and no one group controls it Guys who knows a lot of history: Britain did it

i swear to god man we gotta stop letting liberals pretend to be religious

Charlie Kirk actually died by being mogged by Clavicular. His cortisol levels spiked and that's why his neck did that. He was fountain maxxing.

They got me with the Alysa Liu thing man. I'm hooked. I need her to keep doing fun stuff cuz she smokes too tough. Her bitch too bad.

you were working as a waitress in a hot dog bar a hot dog bar you were working as a waitress in a hot dog bar a hot dog bar you you were working you were working as a waitress in a hot dog bar you you were working you were working as a waitress in a hot dog bar

"Hey that's actually good point I wonder who wro-" GREG PAK?!?!? From Comic Books?!?!?!

I am the Grim Reaper For Fucking Pussys like you . I will hit you in the mouth. Do not ask me questions

"Professor White Boy " has perished. They found him self harmed at the bottom of an elevator shaft. Thanks for the fucking smiles, Professor

most fucked up things that ghislaine maxwell did: 1. pedophilia i guess 2. being named ghislaine

Favorite part of the new Muppets pilot/special is when Sabrina Carpenter put Gonzo up her ass

These posts back-to-back suggest a fascinating story.

World where the moon is made of cheese: "My name is Squeak Armstrong, this is one small step for mouse one giant leap for mouse kind." "This is Fuzz Aldrin. Stilton, we have a problem"

Lawful Evil is the funniest alignment. Nothing Le Wacky Wholesome Chungus Chaotic Good bard does will ever be as funny as the guards in Morrowind asking you if you have a license for that murder then pleasantly apologizing for holding you up when you produce said license.

the only way to improve Star Trek: TNG would be if they'd give each major character an episode where they fucked a ghost trapped in a candle

She had insane swag

A bunch of Millennials online: Wow why is Gen-Z so sex negative this is crazy why won't they bone? Every 20-something ciswoman I am friends with on Instagram: Likes 400 reels a day about how they want to be held down and tied up and fucked all day.

Old "What If...?" Comic: What If one panel of a Captain America comic changed and because of that there was another holocaust? New "What If...?" Comic: What if Thor was Venom?

Honestly I've seen much worse bunnies before.

What if there was a scary messed up version of The Boss named Boos Springscream?

Guy who kinda gets it: "ICE is like America's Geppetto"

Did we ever find out if they were giants or not?

Full #epstein list: -Bananas -Eggs -Raisin Bran -Nutmeg -Salt -Frozen lasagna -Lactose free Cheese -Oat Milk -Semi-sweet chocolate chips -Spinach -the Doritos in the orange bag -Toothpaste -10,000,000 cash paid to me by Donald Trump for child sex -guide on how to not kill self -Coke Zero -Bread

Imagine getting dome at the Scientology centre in Tel Aviv

Me and the bad bitch I pulled by shooting cum out of my watch:

He is a gay man

my favorite right-wing podcast is get cynical. I’ve picked up on the hidden messages Spencer includes in each episode.

she manifest on my destiny til i expand westwardly

Honestly people shit on bluesky but I'd rather chronically online gen x people and bad memes than a robot that makes child porn and wants to kill its own creator running wild. Like, the Twitter nazis were one thing, but now it's genuinely an unusable website.

this was a funny one

People on bluesky will really be like "you believe in legislative hardball while in the minority, even if that leads to collateral damage? that pales in effectiveness to my strategy, winning every election forever" and then win ~50% of elections

Pussy bald look like Rufus from Kim Possible I got a bitch look like the mom from Kim Possible Dr. Draken when I'm sipping on the kraken Crash my car off the perc I'm in the hospital

If it weren't for Wattpad and AO3 we would probably have way more Kate Bushes

letterboxd.com/Dracmin/ Follow me on the Box

Seeing the response to Fantastic Four: First Steps is a surreal experience for me. It feels like a prank how hard people are glazing a movie that was chopped apart worse than Whedon's Justice League cut. The film has no first act. The characters have no personality besides what we're told about them

LAWYER: your honor my client believes that the opposite of meteor is youteor OTHER LAWYER: objection your honor it is clearly meteand ME (from the jury): youteand JUDGE: *bangs gavel* i will not tolerate a double opposite in my courtroom

One of the most underrated parts of Star Trek TOS that nobody talks about is the episode where they keep talking about how this computer genius is visiting who everyone is glazing and he shows up and he's a black guy. Nobody mentions it because why would they? It's the future. But for the 60s? Wild.

Me and the bad bitch I pulled by shooting cum out of my watch: