This boulder is giving memento mori #MementoMori

Shouldn't the plural be "manfaces"? #localJournalism #manface

'Cuz no one likes a bully?

This is exactly what's wrong with America. People think they're watching a TV show when Trumpf is spouting his endless soundbites, so they vote for the most entertaining personality, then the republicans can start starving and murdering citizens who they don't want to share the country with.

Couldn't help but adapt these panels from the amazing #Buddha by #Tezuka:

proofreading is your fiend

🎶 and if I can't get next to you, I'll settle for the breast of you 🎶

When will the madness end? Wasn't the blockchain supposed to solve this for us somehow?

We are living in hell.

if you start the humpty dance at 11:58:56 pm you can be getting busy in a burger king bathroom by midnight

I call this one: "Where's your tormentor, Charlie Brown?"

Subhuman Lawns (Except this would be a great band)

There's no I in idiot

Idiots are people two! (I'm just gonna skeet the best 30 Rock episode titles)

i do not think therefore i do not am

Fun fact: Black Friday is the only day of the year that is 4 weeks long

Shirt for Christmas that just says “gay apparel” on it

In 1949, Albert Einstein wrote WHY SOCIALISM. Here is an extract.

Which is the guy with feathery hair and a beard: Kenny Rogers or Kenny Loggins?

two wrongs don't make a right but three alrights make a McConaughey

👉👈 Stare past this into the distance and you'll see a floating sausage

I figured out who my bearded celebrity doppelganger is.* *this was the best collage option on my phone

That feeling of accomplishment when you finish a sauce bottle, only to realize that you'll just have to buy another one.

Can’t. Busy cultivating a personality.

I used to read whole books!

Commas are the parsley, in the teeth of my posts

Li'l Joey Stivic laid in wait in the dark box, patient for the moment when his new master would unleash his cursed form unto the world.

What I see: Ngl What I hear in my mind: niggle

jesus christ just tell us if it’s maybelline

I know there's furries, but is there such things as smoothies?

The vibe I bring to any function

You: Stop and smell the roses! Me: I'll smell when I'm dead

Ugh I'm between belt holes. Guess I'll aim for the fatter one.