Spanish fans looking forward to some boisterous celebrations..

I’ve just spent an hour sorting shop fixtures in a container. 44 degrees. I’m wetter than an Otter’s pocket

New David Holmes just dropped 👌 david-holmes.bandcamp.com/album/trespa...

Good morning all, and especially to our new fash-slaying Clacton Overlord..

Well, Egypt gave it a proper go. Great effort 👏

Kinell Zico! ⚽️ Egypt in a quarter final?! 🤞

Hydration break 🥤

“Your public life drama, baby, leave me out”

Nigel and Rupert doing sensible, grown up politics.

I've just given a statement on my future in public life. I'd leave it five minutes if I were you…

I will make a statement on my future in public life at 2pm..

I will make a statement on my future in public life at 2pm..

Roberto delivers his verdict on Ronaldo’s performance via the method of the universal sign.

c h o r t l e

Tonight, Leo. Do your thing tonight.

Having sat dormant on the drive for almost 18 months and not being turned over once, the car started first time this evening with a battery pack and ran perfectly. Off to the garage for you little Noddy car for a full service and MOT. Road trips are back, baby..

“The Adventures of Splat, the Penguin” Seriously though, this is an incredible leap of faith… 🙏

Predictions for Portugal vs Spain tonight? Bruno to get a PB chasing the Ref’ moaning like fuck. Cucurella doing the never-ending Neymar roll every time he’s touched. Ronaldo getting through a lorry load of Kleenex no matter what the outcome. Much falling, fouling and cheating. Great stuff!

Get well soon Jordan Henderson

Two dogs who have borrowed their mum's car for the first time and are trying to persuade me to drop what I'm doing to go and break into a tennis ball factory with them.

Declan Rice is gonna come back to Arsenal with IKEA assembly instructions

Jordan Henderson yellow card and stretchered off the pitch after falling over a hoarding. Hasn’t played a minute. Heroic.

Elmer Fudd is that you ?

The Long Playing Record. Invented by Columbia Records in 1948. Where would we be without our LPs? It doesn't bear thinking about.

Might do some football posts later, just for a change, like..

As WC filth goes, this is possibly the gold standard. I'm told Hungary v Brazil in 1954 was of a similar standard, but I haven't seen that one. youtu.be/T5jVMSlpZhg?...

Yesterday I remembered the time Luis Suarez batted a Ghana winner off the line with his FULL HAND in the 2010 World Cup, got a red card, Ghana missed the subsequent penalty, the match went to a shootout, Uruguay won. Just the absolute pinnacle of epic shithousery, very funny if you're not involved.

I’m all for letting a game flow, but only 2 possible explanations tonight; the ref had either been got at by a gambling cartel who weighed in on zero Paraguay yellows, or a criminal group who threatened his/family’s lives. He shouldn’t be allowed to officiate internationals again.

3% - the chance McCoist gave them, and they take Argentina to 111 minutes, pushed to the very limit. Cabo Verde, what a wonderful story! 🥰

Little Cape Verde, taking mighty Argentina to extra time? Marvellous, isn’t it, aren’t they?

Messi’s eyes never left the ball ⚽️ G O A T

Me reading your posts, when nobody’s pictures are loading..

Hydration break? Good call. Hoo roo..

No Harry Kewell for Australia tonight? Missed a trick there, lads..

Forgot to put my out of office on for today, so just switched my work phone off. Had a quick check just now - big mistake, and oh my, Monday looks like fun. May stay up for the footie now so zombie me just won’t care. 😬

FB memories from 7 years back when, sat in the garden and Joe climbs up onto my knee, with his face an inch from mine and shares my mug of Yorkshire. Good job I loved him.

Sorry I am late, I was watching the football next week.

Sat out in the garden sun with a coffee and all the birds are swooping round my fat balls.

Me in 1990 when I climbed in to my mum’s mate’s chicken house and couldn’t get out.

The Dog has granted me the most luxurious of 6-hour lie-ins, for which he shall today* be worshipped *for all time

Hadaway man im a 61 year old fat nufc fan, and I reckon I could chip the ball 12 yards doon the middle of the goal.

Yves Saint Laurent cocktail dresses, known as ‘Homage to Pop Art’, Fall/Winter 1966 haute couture collection. Published in LIFE magazine, September 1966 📷 Jean-Claude Sauer

This should be the only way that Crocs could be legally worn.

Well, I hope you’ve all enjoyed your couple of hours as England manager as much as I have. Well done, you’ve all done very well..

Now they’ve gone snd spoiled it with old Tefal-head’s Wonderwall. Cheers Noel, World Cup’s ruined now.

Looking forward to Tuchel’s post match interviews, always refreshingly honest and calmly bats the hacks away with ease.

Now that was just magnificent, Harry! ⚽️ Oh my word..