That's what happens when you balance life on a triple beard.

They should make a flashlight that's powered by piss. Like you just go ahead and piss in it and it turns on. Someone with engineering experience should get on that right away!

Holy shit god damn

I knew i had a good reason to hate Chris Pohl, Blutengel, and all of his other side projects because holy shit this is horrendous. Why does this exist?

if elected president i promise to be just as corrupt as our current leadership, perhaps even moreso. but I will also reinvest the entire defense and policing budgets into creating what i call The Health Cigarette

Ravaged by a Werewolf at Bellevue Hill Park. A new erotic thriller from the twisted mind of @nazgurrl.bsky.social

Can you imagine the sick riffs Jimi Hendrix could have written if he only had access to a sick ass B.C. Rich Warlock or something.

Who up Edmunding their Fitzgerald?

Titane, 2021

It should probably be illegal to fuck someone else's car

Who about to be up Suiciding their Commando tonight at Necto

I have no meat in my body. It is all car parts and magnetic knifelike teeth.

If you were at the club tonight and didn't chant "group sex, group sex, group sex, group sex, cum all over the place" during the Time Warp just know that i am personally dissapointed in you.

"I bet Ronald McDonald fucks like crazy, at least he's tall." - @nazgurrl.bsky.social

I've never said this before but we need Dave Matthews to tour and play Chicago now more than ever.

"This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gondor," i holler as i overturn my uncle's funeral pyre and turn the 4th Age of Man into the 4th Age of Shit

You're shitposting I'm posting shit We are not the same

it’s time

meanwhile at the Riyadh Comedy Festival

Stress-Free Eric Adams Spends Day Bribing Pigeons In Central Park

One funny thing about my cat is he will literally start EATING BOOKS just to get my attention

Appointing James Hetfield to head the CDC and announcing breakthrough research proving a correlation between lifestyle and deathstyle.

I bet the YouTube Costco deals guy fucks like an absolute animal. youtu.be/dce5DxZTxGM?...

Truly funny that we only got dumber from here youtu.be/rGjEaRbQvpI?...

I guess you aren’t allowed to whack off to your favorite nu metal bands anymore

I wonder, at what point the democrats will figure out that they are dealing with a Hitler?

Fuck AI Fuck The Police Fuck these Corporations youtu.be/Pp9MwZkHiMQ?...

This is an INSANE deal

I know there's a lot of controversy about the Cracker Barrel logo, so I worked up a new option that should be good with everyone... The barrel is back, but it's now guarded by Scubble, The Cracker Goblin. I also worked up a new slogan for the company!

Come see us at Mixwells or check us out on Twitch. www.twitch.tv/second_circle_

Zao is the only truly good Metalcore band. youtu.be/ZCoqMeoNYsk?...

I just want to hang out at Indigo Ranch in the 90s

My new single PUSHING ROPE is now on streaming! Bandcamp presales for my TWO new albums is AUGUST 1ST (and you'll save a few bucks ordering early;)). Please share and spread the word! #diy #industrial #cvltaf #ebm #electronicmusic

I am never going to be sad when a cop or a Blackstone Executive dies. Be real.

Come see us at Mixwells Tonight for Second Circle its fisting night so there's a ton of hand puppets available to adopt. We'll also be streaming on Twitch at Second_Circle_

Don't worry, if the tornado comes i will shoot it with a gun and it will go away

Come see us at Mixwells in Cincinnati for the best genre in history.

Checking in on the DNC's new YouTube series that Chair Ken Martin "cements our commitment to meet this moment"

I am truly heartened by what our community came together and accomplished tonight. To say i'm blown away is an understatement. As shitty as everything is right now y'all give me hope for the future. I love you

Holy shit the Dems suck so much.

Chris Pohl must be stopped.

Chris Pohl has never been silly a day in his life.

Priest goes so incredibly hard. Love to see them getting the mainstream recognition they deserve, truly some of the best folks in the scene doing it today. youtu.be/XlrYvJNF5yQ?...

Ever had your shit pushed in?

My Lyft driver got me home from work in 5 minutes when it usually takes 10, spent the entire time talking to me about how overpoliced Columbus is compared to Cincinnati and how he wished he could "duct tape every cop to a dentist's chair and torture them to death" 10/10, no notes.

Playing Last Resort at emo night is nu metal stolen valor. (Papa Roach still sucks)

Greegus kronk superstore

We're doing nu metal stuff tonight

ah the ol' fire extinguisher fulla paint gambit.

BREAKING: A few minutes ago, a vehicle of three people was rammed by a truck belonging to federal immigration authorities in Boyle Heights, CA. According to security footage shown to me, they deployed chemical munitions & detained the driver at gunpoint. All are US citizens according to the wife.