WTF Morrisons? You're not doing any in store baked wholemeal bread or rolls until December 30? The big Tesco is getting my Christmas food money.

Oh my god. The hangover. This is why I don't drink.

It's my birthday week, so first cocktail of the year. A classic margarita. And that's an old Absolut bottle with lemon squash in it. It's not vodka, I promise.

I'm not going to name names, but some people have irked me today.

Watching a movie I recorded ages ago on 5Action. Kellan Lutz in leather is rather a sight to behold.

Scott and Jay from Five would still get it #BBCStrictly

It's a sad day when patriotic hero Tommy Robinson can't visit a Muslim country and get his arse handed to him and publicly shit himself.

I wonder where George Lucas got the idea from...

Going out at 0800 tomorrow to do the Christmas food shop. My dad's on a cruise, I'm going to my brother's on Boxing Day, so can have whatever the fuck I like for my birthday. Breakfast will be smoked salmon and scrambled egg on sourdough. Not sure about lunch.

Our Santa’s Grotto is temporarily closed. I will be taking no more questions at this time.

Salem's Lot is on Sci-Fi this evening at 2100. I've watched it once and it still gives me nightmares.

Ever wanted to argue your opinion live? Rob Manuel's Anon Opin Live is your chance. Leicester shows: 12–13 Feb 2026. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole

Thierry Henry's speech on SPOTY. Didn't make my eyes water. Honest.

HOLD THE FRONT PAGES. There's a DFS sale on.

Dear gays, I have to beg your forgiveness. I've had to put the big light on the the small bedroom to reattach a label to a Christmas present. In my defence, there are no other lights in said room.

Just reminded by blue Grindr. If you want to feel old, N*Sync's Pop was released 25 years ago in May.

Have the Germans come up with a word for 'forever adding to my Netflix watch list but never quite in the right mood to watch any of it'?

I'm excellent at wrapping presents. But there are some ... interesting shapes to wrap this year. The hardest, strangely, are my brother's Puzzler and my nephew's PS4 game. They're so thin, it's hard to get neat corners. Yes, in a perfectionist.

This is a blast from the past. Should ask @tuffcub.bsky.social to do an extended remix as a birthday present for me 😉

I am an adult and will not laugh. I am an adult and will not laugh. I am an adult and will not laugh. I am an adult and will not laugh. I am an adult and will not laugh. I am an adult and will not laugh. I am an adult and will not laugh. I am an adult and will not laugh.

Ultimate time line cleanse.

Today's lunch. Home-made chickpea, chilli and coriander soup.

Does foot size really correlate to dick size. I'm 5'8" and not small in the underwear department and I have size 10 feet. Do I have big feet for my height?

A long time ago (I'mv thinkig 1998 or 99) when I only hsd one chin

Julian has his chest out. This doesn't bode well for Balvinder’s dance #StrictlyComeDancing

Love this!

I love Lorne sausage - and you have to get it from Fife - but the amount of fat that comes out of it is scary.

I want to do something like Race Across The World or Hunted, but I don't have anyone to do it with.

Marco Rubio ordered diplomats to switch from Calibri font back to Times New Roman. But let's be honest, this is a Comic Sans administration.

I need cuddles. I'm feeling blue, meh and subby.

AAARRRGGGHHH! My dad asked me round to teach him how to make a "proper" curry. I'm a white boy from south Wales and SE Scotland, but I've worked in hospitality for decades. I did my research. Brought all the stuff round. Started to tell him what to do and when. He told me I was wrong.

Quotes out of context: "Pop your lips round this tube and give me one, long, steady breath." Gay porn or Police Interceptors?

OMG! The place I grew up has been featured in the Guardian Thursday quiz. www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle...

Again, apologies for the errant grocer's apostrophe.

@vaughanbw.bsky.social Regarding your FB post, nothing is free. If you're not paying, you're the commodity.

A guide to adding a header image to your pprofile

Coooooo-Kieeeeeee

Home-made leek and potato soup with Worcestershire sauce. (It's not that dark IRL)

Can't believe they're using shop bought Yorkshire puddings on Morning Live.

In terms of food, what branded item would you never swap for a supermarket own brand? And what supermarket own brand do you think is as good or better than branded? For me, it's Scott's Porage Oats and Asda's Wheat Bisks (same as, but cheaper than, Weetabix).

And another one. If Iran and Egypt don't want any Pride celebrations - it's Seattle's Pride weekend - to coincide with their world cup match, they should default the match. www.theguardian.com/football/202...

2025/12/10. It's 15°C (60°F) and I'm in shorts and t-shirt. It should be around 7°C (44°F). Anyone who says climate change isn't real needs a good slap.

A racist, an antisemite, a Russian stooge, an election fraudster and a tax dodger walk into a bar. The barman says "Good evening Mr Farage".

🔴If Nigel Farage’s Racism Is Forgotten It Will Give Him Permission for Far Worse When someone tells you who they are, over and over again, it is wise to listen, argues @labourlewis.bsky.social bylinetimes.com/2025/12/10/n...

Bought everything for a lovely pick-me-up breakfast tomorrow morning. Everything bagels, smoked salmon, and cream cheese. I already had bacon in the fridge. Are two bagels excessive for breakfast?

Slava Prague should play without any supporters if they're going to cause a disturbance. Or forfeit the match. #COYS www.theguardian.com/football/202...

Helmut Marko is leaving Red Bull. Maybe he knows something may be true about the Red Bull Ford engine rumours. www.bbc.co.uk/sport/formul...

Apologies for the grocer's apostrophe, I didn't make the pic.

Jesus. He blew 119. The legal limit is 35μg/100ml of breath. The biggest I've ever heard of was 146μg. I wouldn't be able to walk if I was that drunk, let alone drive. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Another bloody roast dinner. But the roast potatoes were great: fluffy on the inside, crispy on the outside. @magnumificent.bsky.social would hopefully approve.