Timeline cleanser youtu.be/HBxn56l9WcU?...

Exactly. Whether he's giving Wendy's his unused roadkill or giving America's children easily preventable diseases, RFK Jr. has a very charitable soul.

He called ICE on a living nativity

Primary every single one of them.

Wrestling legend Mick Foley just announced he’s parting ways with the WWE because of their connection to Trump: "I no longer wish to represent a company that coddles a man so seemingly void of compassion as he marches our country towards autocracy…." 💪

FUCK YEAH! Congratulations, Ahmed!

The Contrarian

I heard that watching this gave Trump his first boner in a decade.

The Bill of Rights was ratified on this day in 1791. For the last 105 years, we've defended those rights, alongside the entire Constitution, and we aren't stopping any time soon.

📌Erika Kirk was married to a racist, homophobic, and misogynistic man, who was tragically cut down by one of the millions of guns he told us were an acceptable cost of preserving Republicans' bastardized understanding of the 2nd Amendment. I feel badly for her, but spare me her thoughts on ANYTHING.

Meowy Christmas

But what he really wants to know is how to see kids when they’re sleeping

Fuck Trump and his racist regime.

@jedimindtricker.bsky.social @luckyshitt.bsky.social @nicholehiltz.bsky.social @yappydagger.bsky.social Someone is stealing our #SnowPenis 😲😲

You steal it, you wear it

Fact-check: true

Unfortunately, I had to stage an intervention for our Elf on the Shelf.

chat i sputtered

That Good News Girl @thatgoodnewsgirl.bsky.social

The only thing I have in common with people on Fox News is a contempt for their viewers.

Just when I thought I couldn't admire the man more... 🎯 🎯 🎯 💯 💯 💯 👍 👍 👍

Dick Van Dyke is 100 years old tomorrow. I hope he's making the most of his finally night of Lego building.

Just a reminder that ICE didn't exist until 2002. It's not some longstanding institution that must be maintained. It was created as a knee-jerk reaction to 9/11, and it could be gotten rid of as easily as it was created.

Reason 1,000,001 why I will never give Apple my money. Fuck them.

Javier, our new CEO, wanted to thank everyone for a fun and motivating first week. You all have made his transition process enjoyable. He has much to do but insisted on relaying that his initial numbers indicate that the dogs are all very good and will likely continue to be ❤️

Yep, they’ve fed the global population violent, psychotic anti-human bullshit Tried to stoke race wars Tried to stoke gender wars Tried to stoke religious wars All so we wouldn’t fight the class war, & turn our collective strength to the removal of the tumors on global society #Oligarchy

Hello from Lucky, the River Side Casino chatbot. The holidays are coming and River Side Casino is a great place to spend the holidays with your family for the holidays. Do you have holiday plans for the holidays? Let us know.

Watching Kristapo Noem get demolished at today’s hearing was great but mostly I’m just impressed with the steel-stomached surgeons who had to work on her Tupperware face

Bring this veteran, and all other veterans deported by this heartless fucking regime, home!!!

I heard Ben Shapiro's wife loves making pickle bread. They say she really kneads the dill dough.

Whatever do you mean?

RFK Jr. went with MAHA (Make America Healthy Again) because MACDFPDA (Make American Children Die From Preventable Diseases Again) doesn't quite roll off the tongue.

A stack of Transmetropolitan trade paperbacks.

Sam Altman: "The baby's dribbling." Chat GPT: Would you like to tips on how to dribble it like a basketball? Jimmy Fallon: Wow! That would be amazing!

My impersonation of a political influencer.

I'm the Ghost of Christmas Past, this the Ghost of Christmas Present, and this is the other Ghost of Christmas Present.

SHARE NOW: Texas just got a whole lot louder. Jasmine Crockett is running for the United States Senate and Republicans should be terrified. She’s smart, fearless, relentless, and she doesn’t back down from anybody. This is the matchup Texas deserves. Let’s go.

you’ve definitely heard of elf on the shelf but are you ready for

Gene Simmons just long tongueing the living shit out of Old Yam Tits 🍄

Adorable!

I ordered two.

A teaching moment for humans

Trump can release them today

Ahem