TIP TO NEW BLUESKY USERS: Junction enables characters to power up and use abilities. This means a GF must be junctioned in order to power up and use abilities. Let's begin by junctioning a GF. Right now, no GF is junctioned. All other commands in gray cannot be selected yet. Once Junction is selecte

best part of the Disney NBA broadcast was the complete absence of gambling content

they made 3D Shams so much more engaging than the real one

warming myself by the Netflix yule log

(menacingly) so you’re too old for Santa Claus

IT’S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR

no hot takes, babe, it’s christmas.

merry christmas and happy holidays from all of us here at Mike HQ

"You there, boy! [slurpy inhale sound] What day is it?"

(menacingly) so you’re too old for Santa Claus

the Grinch is a retelling of Beowulf from the perspective of Grendel where he’s defeated by Christmas spirit

Second anniversary of our Apple TV’s spectacular attempt to understand me asking for “Hercule Poirot’s Christmas”

cats must think we’re idiots for never making biscuits on our blankets

moving forward the 49ers control their own destiny but due to the quietly oppressive nature of capitalism i can’t say the same

Amazing

christmas weezer be like sleigh it ain't so

mistaking a post for serious medical advice because it didn’t include ‘/s’

well it’s about damn time

grief takes many forms but this one is new to me

10 bags down. of 26. of the first of three boxes.

i don't love it but it took 4 hours of exposure and an hr of post so I might as well lol

as always: I would’ve quit my football job to spend more time with my supermodel wife and our family, it would have been easy for me.

wrapping christmas gifts with these

Me, when the scissors go csssssllllhhhhhhhhhssshhh through wrapping paper: 🥰🎶💍🍻❤️‍🔥🙆‍♀️🫦🫶🤩 Me, when the scissors go fkkkkfffrrrrbbbrrrrttttkkkkkfmb through the wrapping paper: 😤🔪💀🏚️☹️🔫💪👿💣

the game is tied (derogatory)

Gen Z Joni Mitchell: 🎵oooh you’re a mean old zaddy but I like you🎵

WHO TOOK MY – oh wait there it is

what does Mateer have against Kanak?

‘who wore it better?’ I just hope they both had a good time

if I’m just silently sitting in thought there’s a solid chance I’m once again thinking about Yoshinobu Yamamoto coming out of the bullpen in Game 7 of the World Series

i dunno guys, this publicist is saying some pretty believable things

fine let's hear the guy out

was the grich there?

incredible stuff over at r/ididnthaveeggs It’s a eggnog recipe

content streaming? no i’m pretty depressed

looking for a last minute gift idea? everyone needs another pair of kitchen shears

my 4 year old son is legit stoked for the Mickey Mouse basketball broadcast on Christmas, it’s coming up a lot.

placing bets on Kalshi is a quick way to let everyone know you have an empty void where a soul used to be that will never be filled

Your post is being read by...The Nozzle

actually i prefer savory caroline

have the young men dealing with the loneliness epidemic tried not being so lonely?

don’t forget to nog your eggs

trying to mute karoline leavitt’s face now more than ever

Toad put his head close to the ground and said loudly, “Now seeds, start growing!” Toad looked at the ground again. The seeds did not start to grow.

and what if you could see farts? what then?

(knocking on door) you better not be having a midlife crisis in there

In the USA even the very wealthy old men must perform as gladiators until death in inhospitable outposts like Indianapolis in order to provide their children with medical care.