We can put a man on the moon but we can't make him drink

no matter how many hawks i watch, none of them have boiled yet

thinking about the days Dayla would wish all the freaks out there a happy 3:11 @dayla.bsky.social

shoutout to the heroes working graveyard shift at Plaid Pantry

management let me have the day off today, so that was nice

in the last hour of my 12 hour shift, I was alone with a patient when she stopped breathing and began to have a seizure. she was a new admit, not yet hooked up to any monitors. i didn’t know what to do except call for help, which came quickly and were able to stabilize her

I started uploading a certain album to relevant online services

Many people on here

The president is bad because he is orange.

watched about 10 minutes of Earnest commercials before i decided to just unfriend Victor

i am once again reading sad book (hemingway) while listening to sad music (blaze foley). but both are also a little funny, which is nice

this week, someone i don’t know at my company got full on kidnapped by the off-brand gestapo. one of my direct coworkers got stopped by them, he wasn’t taken but the alarm is there. things are very normal

spending all my free time looking on ebay for waterproof cycling clothes

those silly feds have three helicopters up there tonight. why. there’s literally nothing happening

fighting the urge to scream FUCK ICE at the Portland skyline because i’m at my workplace

🔔You have 3 NEW Sandcastles 🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊 [open beach app] Sandcastle unavailable Sandcastle unavailable Sandcastle unavailable

the sky tram should play KMHD while in transit

TotK real

man this Kawhi Leonard scandal is really the craziest thing that’s happened in the last week

today a 95 year old Japanese man told me he might be a ghost

@ me today

the average Jared post

just got fiber internet installed, and boy are my arms downloading fast

Mars and i have been laughing about this for days

here are some old pics for the sake of it store.steampowered.com/app/359050

today i had a patient say “im shitting my pants right now” to which i responded with “nice work” and a fist bump

i will not eat your ass and clam i will not eat them, Sam I Am

watching Michael Jordan highlights and pondering his career

moving homes on hot days makes nate a damp boy

you guys i was there. nate fucking killed in his puppet improv musical friday night. i can’t stress this enough as a director of puppets. he was brilliant.

accidentally discovered that i love puppeteering

today, i met a therapy dog named Bento, and he helped a kid stay calm while i took their blood. good stuff

our new neighbors showed us the scheme the whole apartment complex runs for free laundry, already loving this place

don’t be afraid, you can watch it

i cant stop watching this live Jeff Buckley performance on BBC where he flips off the host and then ascends to a higher plane

from what i understand if you go to the doctor in canada they prescribe you cans of barq’s root beer that look really weird

Patient, sobbing: But Doctor, I AM Pagliacci! ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.

Barbara Ann playing at this bar, but it’s not the Beach Boys version. didn’t even know it was a cover in the first place

Cassius King

Jeff Buckley’s life story is so poetic

we like to popcorn we like, we like to popcorn we like to popcorn we like, we like to popcorn we like to popcorn we like, we like to popcorn we like to popcorn we like, we like to popcorn

mama’s little baby loves creamed corn, creamed corn mama’s little baby loves corn in head

this video happened the same day as “chair” and makes me laugh just as much

happy 3rd birthday to my favorite video

kermit the frog: i don't know if there's a soul, but every time one of the men who controls my actions dies or is fired, a part of my essence is destroyed. i don't know how much more of me i can lose fozzie bear: i got fart shoes!

every film and series shot in New Mexico is just making up the worst possible guy and letting him make a mess, but i think we can all agree that the worst of them all is still Alec Baldwin

on my Judas shit