I saw Titanic at 16 and it affected me so profoundly that I was depressed for 2 weeks. I went again with my best friend and this time something uncorked and I fully lost it weeping in the theater. Then I saw my high school guidance counselor in the parking lot after I’d obviously been crying.

My stance on doomers remains consistent and it is that I think running around publicly shitting your pants in fear all the time is shameful

Black Mirror was not a how-to guide and I'm getting tired of having to say that.

I would like to go back in time to about 2018 and thank myself for predicting I would want a second cute penguin sweater from Forever 21. I left it in the plastic package and just found it today. 😀

Long John Silverchair

Nobody. I do not think you can eat chair

I find myself frequently saying (sometimes out loud, sometimes internally depending on my spice level) “yes stop exactly there”

I'm starting to wonder how much "the male loneliness epidemic" is just straight and bisexual women identifying low-effort, mean, and incompetent men and choosing not to date, marry, and tolerate them anymore

Since everyone liked that passed-out drunk bathroom raccoon so much, why not go viral by OD'ing on fent and showing hole on our new bathroom cam? Please continue to enjoy arbys

Misty Pacaday

The FIFA Peace Prize sounds like a throwaway 30 Rock joke about an event Jack Donaghy was attending or Jenna Maroney was performing at.

Put me down as a slop-bowl-enjoyer. Chipotle, Qdoba, Naf-Naf...bring them to me

people in hospice look more alive than this

“AI is clearly sticking around so you have to get used to it” wrong. I don’t have to get used to shit. I am a practiced hater and I can keep this going for decades if I am required to

As somebody with a good understanding of electricity this is beyond horrifying.

I see this and hear that exasperated moan-gasp that Michael Kors would make on Project Runway when something was truly horrible.

I love the gap between the official online groyper run info organs posting genAI pics of him as “warhammer fascist battle pope” while the actual guy looks like “ET sick in a creek”

I think it has to be The Studio.

I’ve been really enjoying this YouTube series by a gay couple that bought a run down Catskills resort and is trying to renovate it. They’re just getting started but it’s so well produced and I am rooting for them. www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecGE...

For this year’s mashed potatoes instead of adding any salt I used Better Than Bouillon roasted garlic flavor. Oh my goodness…I will be doing this forever more.

This doesn’t seem like it would be comfortable but she apparently likes it.

pluribus is the only show brave enough to ask if one mean lesbian could save the world

remember folks thanksgiving is the one day that your dog is allowed to plug in all twenty of your toasters on the same circuit as a treat

One Christmas my aunt Sharon asked my mom to get the shrimp from Sam’s Club so she got this big bag of uncooked super jumbo shrimp. But the outcome was a platter of big gray shrimp that Sharon didn’t know needed cooking and a couple aunts eating raw shrimp before anyone noticed.

Free drag name, Jaye D’Egg

tfw you’re fucking the lasagna man for lasagna

Twitter accounts are based in Russia. BlueSky accounts are based in homes with, frankly, too many books, plants, obsolete cables, and pieces of rustic pottery, that could do with a bit of a tidying up, to be honest.

Every time I see Iman I’m a little taken aback by her beauty. I also hear her say in my head “I’ll have a twist of lemon” from LA Story.

⚔ New comic: Fight to the McDeath ⚔

I will vote for anyone who vows to prosecute these little shits

This is so completely true. Walmart is evil but so is virtually any competitor. Target can’t compete on price and if I no longer feel like I’m getting value from the experience or ethics (and I don’t) why would I pay more?

The simplest explanation is usually the right one: 1. Trump is easily manipulated by anyone charismatic. Mandani is charming AF and apparently knows how to handle a narcissist. That’s it. 2. MTG is peacing out two days before her pension-for-life goes live. This I almost respect tbh.

Despite seeing both movies so, so many times it wasn’t until watching Heathers tonight that I realized the music is *obviously* done by the same person as Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead. The scores are so similar.

One deep breath and somebody’s getting a button to the face. Also why is he lactating

The email marketers putting events on my calendar that I didn't ask for are going entirely too far.

A fascinating article that makes me worried we are further along the road toward the death of all truth than I already feared.

A Quiet Piggy (2018)

Stacked cats

I saw one of these (a Chevy Spark EUV) when I was in Mexico and it stopped me in my tracks. Why can’t we have this here? It looks like a miniaturized Bronco that’s also an EV. I feel like this would print money given the opportunity.

working at the nyt

Mexico City is wild. They are so committed to greenery in the city it looks like skyscrapers grow from the forest. ❤️

The whole time I was here I couldn’t stop thinking about the tesseract in Interstellar. Walking around with “Murph!!” reverberating in my head.

Olivia Nuzzi whenever someone runs the garbage disposal: I should call him

It me

I wish him a swift recovery but he needs to resign and let our Democratic governor appoint someone else. He clearly hates his job and has abandoned everything he claimed to care about in the primary and general. youtu.be/dkK1OuyOkHw

In Philadelphia this is becoming untenable because regional rail is falling apart. Never knowing when or if your train is coming makes an already pointless commute to center city even dumber. These bootlicky takes are exhausting. People live in cities.

Can we just take a minute and acknowledge that our POTUS is right OUT IN THE OPEN lobbying Congressional members to vote against releasing the Epstein files?! Like... what the fuck else does anyone even need to know?