Fire up the Quattro.

"Together, we will build a stronger and fairer Britain," Starmer vows, arresting a few hundred more pensioners for pointing out Netanyahu is a piece of shit.

If Nigel Farage was having a heart attack and you had 5 mins to save him…. …..What kind of sandwich would you make?….. 🤔

For his 100th birthday David Attenborough should get to surreptitiously release an animal of his choosing into the home of a big game hunter.

"It's a brilliant result," said Nigel Garage, wearing a banana milkshake.

Vote hop not hat. #beer not #corporate

One day Google will do a Pengy special.

When you wake up tomorrow everything will be the same. Don't worry. It's always the same apart from the potholes and the bins and the dozy bastard with ear defenders mowing the verge.

I'd vote for David Attenborough.

I think I'd make a fabulous Councillor if I gave a shit and there was free wine.

8/10 posts on my bluesky are council shite. I'll be back later.

I'm staying here and doing it.

Good morning. Do you have a large farmhouse granary? Yes we do, lovely. Medium sliced? Is that you, Pengy? Yes. Thank you. See you soon, it'll be ready, bye lovely. Thank you, see you soon.

If you get voted in and then go round doing what you feel like ... y'know. Bird Park weekend. 🐦 🐦‍⬛🦜🦉🦢🐧

Can a single image get a song stuck in your head?

Happy birthday for tomorrow, Sir David!

I wonder if there's a word for that?

The Alt Text is gold.

Kenny, let's do a few shrooms and go see if your Nan's finished knitting you that bobble hat.

Won't bother reading the news tomorrow. Load of old shite. Will be going to a bird park to see the hawks and penguins and hopefully meerkats and I think they have an ice cream shop so YAY!

No one normal wants these things around them.

This is a fucking disgrace but actually works. Physics says it can't. Pengy wins again. For the curious, it's a JTAG probe and I only made it because the supplier's lead time is ridiculous.

Agreed. Also, make it look like an accident. Always best.

No smoke

Jeez there's some proper sad shit going down here. A lad opposite drowned a few days ago, he was at uni. His brother's turned up with his belongings, taking them in at home. His mum is still away. Can't imagine.

I wish I paid $4.92 a gallon for petrol.

We’ve been told our content needs to be more informative so here you go

Back from Cádiz. Contrary to anything the news might have said, the EU entry/exit system took a few seconds, there is no industrial action in Seville, EasyJet are ace and cerveza is good for you. Good morning.

Cádiz docks. Hungover.

It's warm and sunny. Here is a picture of our Lord Jesus Christ of the Massive Spliff.

Nice here

a ballroom has a core strategic weakness: the man in the back saying “everyone attack”

The Maillard reaction is a non-enzymatic chemical reaction between amino acids (proteins) and reducing sugars that occurs when food is heated, typically above 140°C, producing browned colours and complex flavours. Good morning.

Things you couldn't make up: Joint Base ANDREWS

I'm not an expert but I'm guessing it was to do with running fast. www.bbc.co.uk/sport/athlet...

I've noticed that people who post complimentary, favourable things about companies and institutions often get sent a load of free stuff. That being so, can I just say what a fantastic job I think @theroyalmintuk.bsky.social does.

Same www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

3rd Edition On Sale Now!

My package from China is in Heathrow. £1 says I get it by 10.00 tomorrow. DHL are amazeballs.

One of the greatest chase sequences ever committed to film.

If you see this post something orange from your gallery.