When you finally get the East Wing just the way you like it

Never been sworn in but I’ve definitely been cursed out

What if he ADMITS he did it, BUT claims he used an AutoCock™️

‘He knew about the girls’

the best neil young album?

So he made a sweet escape? Nice.

Saw this shirt in the store but hear me out; TOP GUT would be way funnier

Happy 80th Birthday Neil Young! Explore his musical legacy (including audio & video highlights) here: album.ink/NeilYoungHBD

Repost with an iconic fictional band

Today was a very stupid day but I have faith tomorrow will be stupider

You know whose political platform is always relevant? That "Rent Is Too Damned High" guy.

John Coltrane Bahia (1965) John Coltrane - tenor sax Wilbur Harden - flugelhorn, trumpet Freddie Hubbard - trumpet Red Garland - piano Paul Chambers - bass Art Taylor - drums Jimmy Cobb - drums My favorite tracks “Bahia” youtu.be/qIy9HjRAev0?si “My Ideal” youtu.be/6Rx53Mczs8s?si

My son and I have been doing this bit for years where before I hand him any food or drink I prepare for him, I take a bite or sip and he goes ‘waiter?!’ in a startled voice. We laugh every time

How about this?

Get to know your Mutuals, list 10 random things you like: Late night shows Bossa Nova Pizza Pyjamas Headphones Capybaras Electric guitars Casio Watches Crocs Hot climates

Sometimes I get jealous of people who are retiring, then I remember they’re nearing the end of their natural lifespan and I get even more jealous.

Me as a therapist: *quits*

Don’t give up on your dreams. Stay in bed 😴

He would have left sooner but his Cybertruck was recalled

Can’t right now, I’m busy updating an app in my phone that I haven’t opened in two years

wut?

Wild that Gordon Lightfoot died on the Edmund Fitzgerald

you're at work, not doing work, farting around on bluesky, I see you and am proud of you

Fast forwarding your story but I still love you

Super glad we got his take

My toxic trait is looking up old Basia videos and just getting lost in them 😌

this is Sunday night

They’re not booing they’re saying ‘truuuuee!’

Ok cool, getting up 👀

Sometimes people say ‘don’t shit where you eat’ but they just mean ‘don’t fuck at work’

if you are on a skateboard and are threatened, the key is picking up the skateboard with both hands. whacking ability is off the charts

football’s all like gimme that coconut i want it it’s beautiful but tennis is all like fuck this stupid lemon i hate it

‘We’ll be right back with more Who Gives a Shit after this’

Ok cool, getting up 👀

How has no one sorted out the digital-products-as-physical-presents problem yet? We used to give each other books, albums, games every xmas, but how do you gift an audiobook? So they can easily add it to their account & have something to open? It's such a gap in the market

I STG every time there’s an economic downturn those Charmin Bears get skimpy on the ply

Everything but 9 because that’s rude and I’m Canadian

Please clap

Quick question you guys how do you cook?

‘We’ll be right back with more Who Gives a Shit after this’