I stopped dying my hair a couple of years ago & was happy to let it revert to its natural state of mousey with a dollop of grey. Until y'day when for no discernable reason I had the strongest urge to dye it dark green. It would look absolutely ridiculous on me. I can't stop thinking about it. 💚

Merry Crêpemas! Please note, I will not be accepting (incorrect) suggestions for "improvements".

1. you will start to learn what the cost of “convenience” is i.e. what it costs to pay someone else something you can do for yourself 2. if you really want to understand resource and conflict management, watch animals 3. “Other” people are just like you!! Holy shit!!!

as an older person (+50) who’s never used ai, here are things i recommend about life: - do DIY (the biggest is learn to cook but any other work you can do for yourself, learn it and do it) - observe nature (all the animals around us have already figured life out) - talk to people in real life

Huh. I didn't know he was married.

In case anyone wondered how out of touch my fashion sense is, I just saw a post showing a really appealing shirt only to discover it was an advert for a museum exhibit.

Hold up. They might be onto something BRILLIANT here. Making housework a competitive event might be the one thing that could make me enthusiastic enough to want to participate.

A reminder popped up from 2020 when Knobhead Cat was just a baby. The feistiness was already evident. 🖤

Hold on to your tits. Mine's Marie Laura Violet Gayler. Yes, THAT Marie Gayler! (A metallurgist born in 1891 who predominantly worked with aluminium alloys & dental amalgams.) 🤘

Ireland has shown that basic income works — not just socially, but economically. Give people time and security to develop their skills, and the returns flow back to society. Now let’s go further. #UniversalBasicIncome #Economics

After much soul searching, I've chosen to go with the traditional (if slightly pedestrian) method of yarn to attach the blanket pieces together. I'm on row 3 of 21 and have had to undo it twice already, so we can safely say that counting to 5 isn't one of my fortés.

[gasp!] It's happened. WE'VE BEEN DRAFTED!! This does of course mean I'm going to have to repurpose my next birthday wish for something else now. Everyone shit up. Im thinking.

Plato knew a thing or two. Problem is our governmental system still ignores his advice. In the UK our electoral system is specifically designed to enhance these shortcomings. If we don't get electoral reform before the next election, the consequences could be catastrophic for this country.

I love the various craft competition shows on TV but they all make it look faaaar too easy and I cockily find myself thinking "I could do that!" far more often than the subsequent evidence warrants.

I love how excited the Olympic athletes get about collecting and swapping badges with the other nations. "Yes, the gold medal was pretty cool, but more importantly I STILL NEED THE NETHERLANDS!"

Deleted that last thread as it was clearly causing issues.

Waiting for Thames Water to declare a drought because it's the 'wrong kind of water'.

ok. does anyone know if it's twice per athlon or every two athlons

At this stage might it be easier if we just ask any members of royalty who AREN'T massive shits to put their hands up? Uh, William, you can pop yours down again mate.

this is why you should *never* hit someone with an rpg. it’s dangerous, it’s shitty, and it’s wrong

I often find myself getting overly irate when quiz show contestants persist in not choosing what is CLEARLY the best category to answer questions on. If they don't stop pretending they can't hear me, I'm going to start taking it personally pretty soon.

I'm struggling to remember a time when it wasn't raining. 😐

Alexa keeps asking if I want to be alerted to snow in my 'area'. Lady, don't you think I'd be the first to know if there was snow there?!

If we get to our fundraising goal, I will show you all our newest miracle cat. His name is Hamham, he has two noses, a wobbly head and a hearing deficiency, and he is SO CUTE I COULD SPLODE. Trust me, you want to see this cat! Donate here:

I've finally finished crocheting all 120 granny squares and have therefore lost any prior enthusiasm I had for finishing the blanket. Alternatives to sewing them together are: • staples • glue • gaffa tape • send them loose to my sister and tell her that her bday gift is a DIY blanket kit

Bit of a low blow from the ol' targeted ads this morning.

All these people saying Trump is a terrible person. But I don't see any of you shitting yourselves on live TV to distract people from your wife's movie failing at the box office.

This was sooner than I anticipated but I'm sorry to report that we've already lost Fred. #PrayForFidl

In order to maximise my distress as it slowly dies, I have named each of Fidl Leaf Fig's eight original leaves. May the odds be ever in their favour.

Me, remembering the weekend is nearly over.

I gave in to temptation and bought a £6 fiddle leaf fig plant from Lidl. (Fidl leaf fig?) Anyway, they are notoriously difficult to keep alive and already has some suspicious leaf activity so I don't have much hope for its survival, but hopefully I can make its passing comfortable. #PrayForFidl

Been doing some heavy duty gardening and have come in for the 2nd time to try to stave off hypothermia. In stark contrast the local ice-cream van has been obnoxiously doing the rounds the entire time I've been outside. I can feel another sun ≠ warm presentation coming on.

Finally he's proving to be useful. (Tables are useful.)

The Deborah Council's mandated annual pilgrimage has yet to yield results. Seems it's just not that flammable.

One of my favourite Teams features is the notification everyone gets when a meeting has been and gone and some numpty who missed it tries to join and restarts the whole ugly thing again. [deducts one house point for Julie from procurement]

how far is Davos from Dignitas

I think we need a second camera shot showing the audience's faces.

Genuine question - what is he SUPPOSED to be talking about?

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Tokyo's Snail meow Print Club is now open. 12 cats over 12 months. Order by Jan 28th to get January's Blep kitty. (see pic) Same price for international orders. Opt out at anytime! www.infinitebacon.com/printclub Thank you!

FUUUUUCKS SAKE. It would appear that there's a knobhead in my loft.

Over the last year I have spent a fortune on supplements to aid my poor decaying body only to discover today that half of them cancel each other out when taken together. There's nothing for it now - I'm going all in. [inhales agedly] IT'S MULTI-COLOURED PLASTIC PILL ORGANISER TIME, BABY!

It's simple, you just get an 8th nation to hold him back.

Also the first recorded sighting of Feathers McGraw.

My favourite quote from It's A Wonderful Life is: "Teacher says, every time a bell rings, THAT IS A SIGN FOR ME, NOT FOR YOU; SIT BACK DOWN"

Because there are very few enjoyable moments in life that can't be improved by the introduction of a spreadsheet, I've crafted a #Traitors tracker. This probably means the secret traitor will be revealed in the very next episode, but time spent perfecting conditional formatting is rarely a waste.

It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth, The ewok one, then a major dip; A baffling plot involving Amidala

I invented a new phone to help save time in the morning

Top bantz from Ronan on the ol' Hootenanny.

Happy 2026 to all who celebrate.