something about SSRIs idk

I wouldn't say that coprolite is my favourite fossil, but it's a solid number two

being very careful to place my beer on the coaster but leaving a perfect imprint of my arm in sweat on the table

spent too long in the sun and now I'm having halo 3 visions of cortana

Here's how data centres are actually GOOD for the heatwave: 1/???

gonna put myself in a giant jelly mould with assorted fruits and berries

gonna freeze myself in a big block of ice with explicit instructions to only unfreeze me once all my enemies have perished

gonna slather myself in original source mint and tea tree until I look like a big slug and see if I can walk to the isle of wight

A new blog post! www.cupburger.org/wed-love-you...

just saw Starmer down the amusements at the beach. his tie was stuck in a 2p machine and he'd given up on pulling it free, too focused on winning the Italian brainrot keyring

While we're all posting the lows of Starmerism:

Happy father's day

going down on your partner with two scrapers and mix-ins like the coldstone creamery

Andy Burnham will independently verify every single nude sent in the UK

Jean Valjean stopped after stealing one loaf of white bread because he didn't want the wholemeal

Women would rather do ecoterrorism than go to therapy

the shop at the end of my road that I only ever buy monster from has just got a brand new monster fridge and that doesn't feel like a coincidence to me

pirate drag performer called Chase Cannons

They're blocking the straits for Pride

Parklife!

I love touch designer

nobody out here making imp movies these days

it's crazy how influential Flea was to specifically Japanese bass players

Pokémon Foucault to the polls

Labour Insider: Keir Starmer has just burned the roof of his mouth on a rice pudding

next time you're in the supermarket, treat yourself to a little glance up you never know what mysteries await you in the roof

Happy birthday to John Brown, who knew exactly how to handle the south’s “Peculiar Institution”

come on man, I just wanted to play some 8-ball pool

Wish there was a mode of politics in this country that wasn’t “slow and easily preventable car crash you can see is going to happen from miles away but can do nothing to stop”

Just in: Keir Starmer has slipped down the crack in the back of the sofa

Noticed a light I'd never seen on my keyboard before. Spent a solid 5 minutes marvelling at it, wondering what purpose a little led light on the zero key could serve. Then I realised it was a bright blue crumb from a sweet I'd eaten earlier

nice yodas finish first

rudy's bayou birth control new ep w/ @tomwalker.bsky.social out now! youtu.be/a-zo-rOjjOM?...

chose a very funny day to play the Assassin's Creed dlc where Churchill tells you a vote is more lethal than a bullet or a blade

<Trent Reznor "Closer" voice> I want a cromulent fuckcrustable

I guess you could say allbirds sold their soles

The first edition of the podcast’s phone swapping game was a real hit. @demilardner.bsky.social

my enemies will cower before me

for the low low price of Some Money, you can now keep me on retainer I have no services to offer but any time you want to say "I've got a guy", that's me

just heard the Minions are working for palantir. sad to hear. always knew there was something malicious in Bob

maybe it's the ol' mental health talking or perhaps it's the 3am but I reckon taking a week away from everything to walk the entire coastline of the isle of wight would sort me out

off to see some jazz, excited for the notes they won't play

Excited for the release date.

I have questions for MrBeast.

drag king called Bill Payers-Permission

English rappers write shit like "Call me egg mayo cause I need Cress- -ida Dick to face justice for what she did"