parent visiting their kid’s school: what’s that lizard doing here? principal: it’s our hall monitor.

all my grapes gone

I'm no fan of Maduro but he's not wrong here.

gender politics is going to get so incredibly fucked up over the next decade lmao we're gonna see some really weird dynamics manifest where one party is openly pro-rape and the other will waste time hand-wringing over how to call it out for fear of "alienating men" or whatever

You may choose one person to tell you the Aristocrats joke.

I’m happy to report that MGMT got their ass

Not my home, but I know my way around.

Is removing Nazi tattoos too woke? We asked some Germans living in Argentina.

The dialogue is a whole other thing but the bit about "fuck you shoot me I'll die for this shit" and the reaction is the crux here, from Gandhi's time on down, no authoritarian in history ever knows how to respond to this and it's why it beats them whenever deployed

Shark3ozero is the best leftist streamer but people would rather dunk on Hasan and Vaush than boost him.

GenAI is inferior because there is no way it could recreate the Naatu Naatu sequence.

Finally watching Twin Peaks and Leo Johnson absolutely had to have been a major influence on Lost Records' Corey Litchfield.

Dale Cooper is such a delightful little weirdo.

My Platner take is he got the tattoo because he existed in a social structure where it was normal and there were no negative consequences for doing so. He knew what it was and it speaks to a lack of strength of character that we don't need in yet another senator.

Pining for the days when it was just Clint Eastwood pretending Obama was a chair. www.washingtonpost.com/dc-md-va/202...

What are the odds this project gets dropped halfway through and it becomes The White House Tetanus Playground.

The AWS outage was actually a promo for the next Bond film where woke DEI communists take out AWS because they're jealous of how totally cool and rich and awesome Jeff Bezos is.

Lol Ed Zitron blocking me because I used the word "typo" in a pun is a peak example of big accounts not being arsed to parse posts before they react.

With the AWS outage, now‘s as good a time as any to post this old strip.

i see you're doing something online that you have effortlessly done 100,000 times. would you like to use this ai tool? would you like to use this ai tool? would you like to use this ai tool? would you like to use this ai tool? would you like to use this ai tool? would you like to use this ai tool? w

The left: always correct—uncomfortably early for everyone else Everyone else: “now that we agree with the left, the left needs to compromise to accommodate us”

Who robbed the Louvre? Right answers only.

What did you do for a Klondike bar? WHAT DID YOU DO?!

President Poopy Pants. Many people are saying this.

New albums from Tame Impala, The Last Dinner Party, AND Of Monster and Men all on the same day? What a bounty.

I could understand Jays fans being happy about their success but it seems like they're happy about doing it against the Mariners specifically. So weird.

I want to root against the Dodgers if they go to the series no matter what but Jays fans are making that real difficult right now.

First Comey and now Bolton. This administration is really forcing us to stand behind the worst fucking people.

Happy John Brown’s Raid day to all who celebrate

“I’m not worried about nazis in the party because this is a Nazi party that uses Nazi methods to achieve Nazi goals and I’m a Nazi. Does that make sense?”

I feel like Ben Gvir personally being in the room when Greta Thunberg was being tortured should be bigger news

The first Jim Crow was enacted under the auspices that racism is a necessity and a great and natural moral good. The second one is being enacted under the auspices that racism doesn’t exist if you claim you don’t see it and anyone who questions your motives about that is oppressing you.

you fucked around and now the Episcopalians are doing memes. are you happy now. are you

Sometimes you do need to beat a dead horse

So glad I got to see @garbage.com one last time. Emotional show, and Shirley will speak about trans rights for five minutes straight because she is punk as fuck.

One of these sides wants me to pay zero taxes and wages to undeserving poors while the other has adherents that said mean things to me on Twitter so I know which side of the scale my thumb is going on.

I know Zohran Mamdani should be Time's person of the year. No one else should even come close And yet, there is a part of me that wants it to be Portland Frog

Damn. Just losing all the good ones this year. variety.com/2025/music/n...

Television is the only medium where you can point to one decade and honestly say that that was when the majority of the best stuff happened.

yearly reminder to people insisting that we view Christopher Columbus as "a man of his time" that *the people responsible for the Spanish Inquisition* thought Columbus was out of pocket

It's an inside wheelbarrow. I never take it outside.

Really want a reporter to ask him "Well, what DO you know?"

what did she call us | patreon.com/lubchansky

Just found out Margaret Thatcher was born 100 years ago today so you know what that means. www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUlj...

One thing that's important to realize about Taylor Swift is that she is exponentially more wealthy than she was even just a few years ago. She will become more and more out of touch with the experiences of normal people and I guarantee you she'll never write a song like Anti-Hero ever again.