I object to the inclusion of Home Alone on this list if only because Home Alone 2 gave us this

People talk about social media like it is some other phase of existence. That is wild. Social media only extended the range of conversation. Cars extended the range of walking. Telescopes extended the range of seeing. Asking this question is like asking "Has talking to people changed your life?"

Portland has elevated protesting to an art form.

James Bond has killed mofos with a phone, a bed of nails, a Speargun, a tire, a smokestack, and gravity itself. A gun is easy mode.

I'll write my skeets on the wall with my own shit like de Sade before I go to mastodon

Hey remember when the United Kingdom announced their historically successful undercover initiative "Operation Julie" before it launched? That really helped them succeed... what? Nobody heard about it until afterwards? Huh.

This must be why Quentin just accused King of ripping off Nightmare on Elm Street with his novel "It". Only problem is Stephen King started "It" in 1980, well before Elm Street was conceived. Moron.

Someone on TikTok said Taylor Swift has contracted “sexually transmitted CTE” and I—

You said...

2025 has been terrible, horrible, no-good, and very bad enough without us having to say goodbye to the legend that is Dolly Parton.

I'm now completely happy with the effect, all the bugs, errors and jumpiness are gone! I'm 100% on this, no weirdness, no oddness, everything works from all the angles I'd ever want. All done in camera!

Lex Luther STAY breaking the law and getting locked up.

"I don't know the details, I just saw a headline"

“turn to joe flacco to keep their playoff hopes alive”

it is imperative that we get Joe Flacco at least one start on the 2026 Steelers so he can complete the AFC North set

Joe Flacco after spending a season behind Cincinnati's offensive line.

Mars was the Roman god of war. That’s why we say ‘martial arts,' ‘martial law,' and 'court martial.' Marshall was the Roman god of designer fashion at discount prices. That’s why we have Marshall’s.

Except they did vote for it. Despite all the people telling that’s what’s they were supporting and voting for. They laughed and considering “owning the libs” as part of the appeal. They PROUDLY voted for it They should be given zero off ramp. They supported fascism for clout and money

Exactly. Dexter, you didn’t think about it because you’re not a weirdo. We’re watching a fairy tale set in space, and you get it. 🤣

I ... never thought about that. ... Shit ....

Either they’re an aviation geek who films the full taxi in addition to takeoff and landing, or they were informed that the plane was holding position due to a left engine problem and started filming just in case.

Why were they originally filming before the flames started?

You supported and voted for a rapist, racist, liar, con artist, and unfuckable dumbass who did a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad job as President the first time around. Not only did you vote for this leopard to eat your face, you voted for him to do this shit to you TWICE!

Literally watched him orchestrate an attack on the Capital, smh

The leopard ate their face.

I just watched a video of an ICE agent trying to find a costumed frog's rear air hole to stick pepper spray in it, and, like, why are we paying people to do this

Trump is claiming no inflation. He knows that, unlike him, we actually do our own shopping and know that’s bullshit, right?

Netflix, 'The Ed Gein story', has quite a few peculiar claims in it, but I was waiting for this one... The term Serial Killer/murderer has been in use since the 1930s and first example of it I could find dates back to 1927.More information here; fakehistoryhunter.net/2019/09/15/s...

These motherfuckers saw the first term and wanted more. Forget Project 20whatever. The first term was damning enough for any rational person with empathy.

They actually scared me as a kid lol.

Mascots are lowkey terrifying.

Goddamn

Ray Bradbury's daughter being a soap opera writer is like if Leonardo Da Vinci's kid painted fences.

Mofo started as a CALL SCREENER for Jim Rome

Weird thing where people say “no one could have predicted it” when really what they mean is their political commitments and orientation were such that they ignored everyone who was predicting it Sorry but “no one could have“ and you having your head stuck up your ass are two different situations

Let's goooooooooooooo woo

Just watched Carnival of Souls (1962) and I feel like I was rooting through a basement and accidentally found the blueprints for David Lynch's entire career

Sometimes I expect Collinsworth to slip and call Josh "Joshy-poo"when he gets to glazing

I really hate Bills games on SNF. Have to stay up past old man bedtime and even if they win I have to suffer through Collinsworth and the Italian stallion.

The fuck are the Bills doing?