Maybe THIS time when I open the Instagram app, I’ll finally see the image I’ve been hoping to see. Wish me luck!

There is a Kalshi commercial where a golfer sees an alien on a golf course and asks his caddy if Kalshi allows betting on alien sightings while LOOKING AT AN ALIEN. THAT IS NOT HOW BETTING WORKS. If it is, I’d like to bet 794 trillion dollars that the Dodgers will win the 2025 World Series.

This was a great band. www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOZT...

Arnor (Blaine Swen) and Axelrod (@markmcconville.bsky.social) have questions about Broth's (Rekha Shankar) childhood in the latest episode. Listen here: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/s...

Sex is cool, but have you listened to Ozzy Osbourne’s criminally underrated 1988 album No Rest For The Wicked while reading Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman’s Dragonlance Chronicles trilogy?

I can’t believe I get to do comedy things in a fantasy realm. Love y’all at @magictavern.bsky.social!

If you are a fan of the Superego podcast, our entire archive is now available for purchase at a site that is 99% less sketchy than the former host site. Full episodes, bonus content, live performances, cinema watchalongs, and everything else! superego.supercast.com?fbclid=PAZnR...

An important message. www.instagram.com/reel/DWKC04w...

On the night that a fly landed on Mike Pence’s head during a debate, I may have consumed some adult candy. I woke up today wondering if that truly did happen. A fly landed on that dude’s head on national TV and he didn’t budge, right?

tariffs happening for no reason and theyre making your life worse, secret police kidnapping people for no reason and making your life worse, firing thousands of government employees for no reason and making your life worse, going to war with iran for no reason and making your life worse

"That's what living is all about. You go out there, you take every opportunity, you do your best, you wear a vest, you take a rest." —Mark 7:26:16

If the climate can change, why can’t I?

Between Roofman and Secret Mall Apartment, 2025 was a pretty great year for one of my favorite micro-genres that I’ll clumsily call “People hiding in commercial spaces films.”

It’d be a great time to go to your podcast provider of choice and subscribe to Superego. Stay frosty.

I love the game of hockey. I can’t stand the culture of hockey.

Maybe the Olympic Labubus can be part of a swag bag? The humiliation is palpable.

JD Vance gets loudly booed at the Olympics.

Starting a rumor that eating a billionaire gives you the power of flight

If you need something as dumb as the day is long to take a break from the hellstorm that is this current situation, this might be it. www.patreon.com/posts/149270...

Pro Football Hall of Famer John Randle posted a statement about ICE as text overlays on various portraits of himself and I kind of love it

🕯️My cousin Brian passed away last night. After a courageous 3 wk stint with ICE. He slipped on a fellow agent’s frozen peepee puddle & somersaulted many times in the air, yelling “yabbada yabbada yabbada” & tragically aspirating (a different) agent’s pee he’d been gargling. He hated women🇺🇸💔

Fine, I’ll do it.

I guess I just don’t know what a horse collar tackle is.

Met a person at a party tonight that is not into Pluribus and I’m honestly considering staying home forever now.

Intriguing idea

I know no one cares about anyone’s fantasy football team, but Jalen Hurts just put up a Rex Grossman on Monday Night Football. I started Hurts tonight, and I started Rex back in 2006, a night that gave us an all-time post-game quote from Denny Green. NEW RULE- don’t start a QB on Monday Night.

I’m in Vancouver for a Canucks/Minnesota Wild game. Just saw a dude in head to toe Houston Texans gear. Why is that random person at every sporting event ever?

A lady on my flight today was so asleep that a flight attendant checked her pulse when she wouldn’t wake up when it was time to land.

Hi Bluesky. My wife is in the Macy’s Parade tomorrow. I’m looking for people who might have an office or apartment on the parade route. Somewhere where I could come and take pictures and watch without wading through the people on the street. I know, I am asking for a miracle…

Why is France the only country that gets their own toast? Before you remind me of Texas Toast, Texas is no longer a sovereign nation, but for about ten years there, two different countries had their own toasts and maybe the world was a better place, toast-wise.

Was Noah’s Ark the first boat Noah built? Quite the accomplishment, honestly. I don’t think I could build a canoe.

Does Jalen Hurts like playing football? Does he enjoy the game? He’s great and a Super Bowl Champion and Super Bowl MVP, but his facial expressions and body language tell me that his loved ones are being tortured by Eagles ownership unless he comes to the stadium once a week.

THE IRON HORSE OF PODCASTS.

HALF BAKED IDEA: The “oops” in Cap’n Crunch’s Oops! All Berries isn’t about an abundance of berries at all. Perhaps it’s the tale of a gruesome and unprecedented industrial accident involving overworked union cereal workers hideously acid-melted beyond recognition in the factory’s non-berry wing.

I have some robust (and admittedly unimportant) opinions about pro sports, but maybe the strongest of all is this: If your team has Powder Blue uniforms, they should be the primary uniforms. GIVE ME ALL OF THE POWDER BLUE YOU’VE GOT!

Wall to wall bangers at Sassafras Saloon tomorrow night.

Let’s face it- y’all need magic more than ever.

I can’t believe what I just saw.

the good news is, the boys in the lab have another 16 hours to cook up a painkiller cocktail for George Springer that zoos normally give to a walrus before surgery

HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Today would be an EXCELLENT day to become a Full Cartwright subscriber. There is A LOT of very funny stuff in the archive and even more in the pipeline. GET INTO IT! www.patreon.com/AndyDaly?utm...

Dieter Ruehle digging DEEP tonight.

Winchester Mystery White House.

Why does Zoom have an AI companion? All I ever use Zoom for is to connect to actual companions.

Same.

I’m normally full of absurdity, whimsy, and comedic idiocy, but I saw the preview for this show yesterday and I’m dead serious about it being so very good. If you’re in LA, go as soon as you can. Fallen Confederate Statues Take Center Stage in the Year’s Boldest Show www.nytimes.com/2025/10/20/a...

@fesshole.bsky.social brings me heaps and heaps of joy. A must follow in my humble opinion.

I am suing the Los Angeles Chargers for permanently damaging my television and eyes with these yellow atrocities.

I’m no Trump fan but it’s not fair/necessary for his physician to reveal that the President has what most closely resembles a custom-built mobile bathtub that’s “just for diarrhea” and that the secret service are responsible for making sure he’s “never more than 30 feet from it.”