Breaking Bad. I couldn’t stand his wife.

Please no, I’m not ready to die yet

On paper I am a biology teacher More recently, many of the IT or business improvement roles I’ve done have ended up with some form of systems training shoe-horned in

Sad though this sounds. The nuances of IVR programming

Gen X, we have a pathological dislike of phone calls

I’d have a car that worked

Oh I’ve grafted today! Post office, subway, Morrisons. Cleared out 3 black bags of cardboard from the attic (all those “that’s a nice box we should keep that” boxes) Sorted 2 bags of clothes for charity & 2 bags for Vinted, then did 3 lots of washing because the Vinted stuff smelled fousty

People talk about how love is what’s bringing everyone together this World Cup and how beautiful that is. Well I’m sorry to burst the bubble but the true unifier, the one cross cultural constant, is hating Ronaldo.

On the plus side, the children wrongly decided to be adults by the Home Office will be able to watch YouTube in the detention camps

Penis beaker off mumsnet

Regretting not getting #thecans for tonight

Evergreen post

Dude looks like his own waxwork that’s been left outside too long

I’ll need to decide on what “real” name to use for the real name police (I’m obvs not going to use my own) Any ideas? I quite like Hugh Jarse

One year ago today I ran across the Øresund Bridge! (Nearly fucking killed me)

Kids. This is peak Bluesky encapsulated in one post

Pork crackling. It’s burnt skin you fucking weirdos

Water in “wet” shocker

New HR app at my workplace. One for @soapachu.bsky.social there

After 2 hours of tinkering I’ve finally managed to get my work laptop working to the extent that I can do my job Now there’s a car alarm going off in the street. Ever get the impression someone somewhere just wants you to gob to the office? (I won’t btw. I’d rather cut my feet off than

Started work at 8am today. Still trying to fix my broken profile on my laptop (because absolutely fuck going into the office) Pretty sure I’m going to jack the whole thing off & spend the day tidying the garage instead of

Starmer & his social media bollocks. My 4 year old has Garmin & Strava accounts ffs

Absolutely loving all the footage of Norman Cook at the Brighton carnival against fascism

I saw something earlier, I think on Instagram, that showed 2 teenage girls and had the caption, “Too old for the park, too young for the pub”. This is the gap that social media is filling. Make it safer, don’t take it away.

For the avoidance of doubt: I wholeheartedly believe that, if your business cannot pay you your staff a living wage as a single person (1/3 housing, 1/3 bills, 1/3 other) then your business is failing. And salary costs come first - before shareholder dividends or CEO bonuses.

Yo @protopigeon.lol a bit later than originally promised but, poaching eggs 1/3

Plaid Cymru is rolling out the most generous childcare offer in the UK to support families and lift children out of poverty. Reform spread misinformation and ignore the problems facing Wales.

Just been to a reunion with folks I worked with about 15 years ago. Fucking brilliant afternoon, really nice to see everyone. Not gonna lie tho, I’m as drunk as shit now

I can't stop thinking about this utterly delicious anecdote in last week's Guardian Q&A with Mark Williams...

EAT,SLEEP,RAVE,REPEAT. EAT,SLEEP,RAVE,REPEAT. (As I’m stood at the self-serve till in Sainos buying reed diffuser refill liquid and some “taste the difference” chorizo, like the effete cunt I am)

Mrs safe & mini safe have taken our cat to the vet for his flea & worms booster Just had a text of Mrs. A dog has just turned up & shat on the floor while the “quiet please” light (the euthanasia indicator) was on. Absolute #scenes I bet the boy is loving it

Happy birthday @veeistrying.bsky.social hope your day is as fabulous as you are

Social media has ruined me. Someone posted this on the local community page & my instant reaction was “YER DA!”

Welsh parliament supporting trans rights da iawn pawb! record.senedd.wales/StatementOfO...

Friends fear he’s watching Se7en again

Cardiff Costco was *very* gammony today Full of the sort of fat-necked pricks who’ll stand in the middle of a busy thoroughfare & have a phone conversation with someone 10 feet away Also since when did it become fashionable to fucking stink of BO? Did I miss the memo?

It’s Friday evening so I’ve been getting my Monty Don on. Our house plants have needed attention for a while (everything needs potting up & moving) so I’ve done a bit tonight Finally given up on my Ficus (the scrawny, bald bastard) and replaced it with an umbrella plant from the bathroom

Vote here for which animals youd like to see on our banknotes! www.bankofengland.co.uk/banknotes/he...

Every recipe should start with: "Wash the dishes that are already in the sink because you'll need some of those."

A picture that captures your essence

8 years ago today my wife frightened Edward “Tenpole”Tudor

My boss’s daughter does competitive cheerleading. They’ve got this thing amongst their troupe where they surreptitiously put clothes pegs on each others clothing, bags etc with positive messages attached So my boss has regaled us all with the tale of “pegging” I nearly sniggered myself inside out

Really Ruthless Szechuan hot pepper sauce crisps They sold them in the bar I worked at. I once scarfed 3 packs while in the cellar then fell down the stairs as they hit me halfway back to the bar

I’m still (sporadically) in touch with my old biology teacher. He’s an absolute legend and is part of the reason I am (on paper at least) a biology teacher myself

Also felt perfectly safe holding my husband’s hand walking in the Arsenal trophy parade, is nice being openly queer in football space

Big thanks to Chris Collins, former Cardiff blues player and fat-necked games wanker who mercilessly bullied me from age 13 to 17 for having the audacity to not be very good at rugby, turning me from a straight-A student to a problem in the process I’ll dance on this cunts grave eventually

Had to go to work for a few hours today, the project we’ve worked on fit 6 months goes live tomorrow so lots of last minute checks. I said from the outset if yall want me in then I’m turning up with my kid Was very amused to look up after about 2 hours in the office & see the head of IT and the

Happy birthday @juxtaposedwithyou.bsky.social hope you’ve had a lush day