Every school in America is going to need to build a ballroom.

Idk man, I think the journalists who have been traumatized the most were not sitting in that room tonight. The feds gassed the shit out of us, knocked us over, sent in the local PD to harass, detain, and hurt us, shot a teenaged photographer in the face and he lost an eye, and that's just in LA

www.independent.co.uk/news/world/a... #Pinks

Holy Moly! Absolutely crazy last couple hours in my neighborhood. A hospital patient took a cop’s gun and shot 2 officers, killing one and the other is in critical condition. The shooter took off naked into a residential area and they found him hiding in someone’s house 500 feet away from me.

⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

my work bff and i always talk about the weirdest things - today it was ernest hemingway's suicidal family, chicago street fests and papusas

Hey assholes - everybody in the world hates you. Everyone. You're the only dumbasses that don't get it. Also, God isn't real. Fuck. Grow a brain.

The main thing in art and entertainment to keep your finger on the pulse of the fans and what they want, their feedback is so important.

if this does come to pass american women need to riot in the fucking streets until the country is shut down

Footage of a horse protecting its owner after a 7.4 magnitude earthquake in Japan 🇯🇵

Holy shit a 4 yo just did the biggest poop I’ve ever seen from a kid. It stunk up the classroom. I’m surprised it went down.

I just saw the thong mom from yesterday and she’s wearing hot pink today and I cannot stop laughing

The most hilarious thing just happened. The kids bring a nap blanket to school and we send them home on fridays to get washed. Today at nap we were putting a kid’s blanket on and there was a bright pink thong stuck to it. Their mom is also 8 months pregnant. 😂

lol someone called the cops

I’m sitting by my window in Chicago and it’s been constant lightning for at least 15 mins. Like something out of ghostbusters.

When you feel imposter syndrome sneaking up on you, just remember that JD Vance lectured the Pope on theology.

I have been kinda taking a break from social media/news and oh my… things are just not going very well for him 😂

ok so I realized after I put them on that I think I’m wearing a neighbor’s underwear. But they’re really comfy so I’m gonna keep em.

happy Rex Manning day!

this is literally exactly me

4 yo: my tummy hurts me: do you have to go potty? 4 yo: no me: are you sure? (she lets out the loudest stinkiest fart that I pretend to ignore) 4 yo: my tummy doesn’t hurt anymore 🤦🏻‍♀️

today my hair looks like helena bonham carter's in every movie she's made

I envy the crew of Artemis II. Mainly for being able to lose contact with this planet.

Some people say we should welcome maga who are turning on trump. All i have to say in response is that we had a couple maga idiots in our family and we just stopped inviting them to things. It's going great.

a friend told me that as a kid her friend would just bring a bag of communion wafers to eat and they’d put hot sauce on them as an ex catholic: 🤯

my jewish husband and I were just talking about how Jesus could have probably used a xanax in that cave

holy shit. I was at work talking to someone and all of a sudden I couldn’t see out of my right eye. Long story short my husband had to pick me up early and now I’m at home kinda just waiting for the rest of the migraine. I think it’s a migraine. And not a stroke.

all I can hear in my head is borat

after a long conversation with a 25 year old I now know who Pooh Shiesty is

bye bye pamela

Say what you will about Chicago but i love that you can get any kind of food here. I have 2 famous Thai restaurants within a mile of me - and those are just the famous ones. It has spoiled me against living most other places.

I don’t think we should be able to visit other planets before we stop destroying ours

Today’s Least Surprising News of the Day. www.washingtonexaminer.com/news/investi...

sending all my love to my trans brothers and sisters today 💜

I did a fire drill this morning and the alarm part got stuck and it wouldn’t turn off for a few minutes and I legitimately thought I was going to die of panic

Trans Day of Visibility is tomorrow. #TDOV #ProtectTheDolls

👀 mol.im/a/15692625

14 people have died in ICE custody this year. More than one per week. Inhumane.

He just wanted to wash his hands and turn off the faucet, but things went out of control.

is wildflowers actually trending? That’s so cute 🌷

I am not a doctor by any means but I am an expert in hand foot and mouth. It’s insane to me how many doctors clear kids to come back to school with obvious oozing sores. Special needs infants, specifically. Like, come on.

I have succumbed to the plague. Patiently waiting for reinforcements at work so I can go the fuck home.

If I was Iran, I’d be saying “We will only negotiate with Obama”

tuition for this ai school is 55k/year I'm a literal teacher with a brain and I don't make that much

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Reminder: While women are being arrested for having miscarriages in america… Ghislaine Maxwell has access to a puppy in her Club Fed Detention Centre

What if we all, everywhere, just agreed to have no things happening anywhere, for like a month. Just for people to remember what it's like.

Absolute insanity. Non stop. The last hour alone - a toddler had a massive blowout and poop got on his clothes, the wall, a pillow, the rug, the sink, teachers, and his nose

Awful. A teenager, dead by suicide in an ICE detention center. There is now a crisis of suicide inside the detention system; I have never seen anything like it. Suicide has happened before, but they were very rare. This is the third or fourth this year.

"i'm on the struggle bus today" bro i am driving the struggle bus. and if it goes slower than 55 mph it's going to explode