your imaginary friend who uses too much electricity is now also annoying

Your daily reminder that there are in fact more of us than there are of them and bigots are not nearly as popular or tough as they think they are.

Wow, the University of Washington's Psych 201 class does *not* play go fuckin Huskies Nazi UW students fuck off

"A sad wank. Is still sad... but it's a still a wank..."

It’s official: AIPAC is trying to buy my election to keep me out of Congress. Apparently, I’m a “dangerous detractor”... by believing Palestinians (like myself and my family) deserve basic human rights. But we’re not going to let AIPAC win.

Trump: ‘Another Thing Epstein And I Never Did Is Play Nude Charades’

"how's the artwork going?" ... #DetectiveDepression

You can't meet in the middle with a transphobe... unless that middle is your back where they plan to place their knife...

ICE attempted and failed to disappear a food delivery guy. It needed to be scored.

This tweet has been doing the rounds on Twitter now that Nathan Gill has pleaded guilty. If only someone had tried to investigate UKIP & Russian interference 🧐 There’s another timeline where the Guardian supported me, doubled down on the investigation & I look 5 years younger ..

You can't joke about anything anymore. Because you signed a multi figure contract with the Saudi government that said they wouldn't pay you if you did.

This is literally what the actual "siege" of the auxiliary ICE building looks like

OK was this a handicap match? If not I hope the person in the yellow shirt has a manager's licence and if they do they should not be inside the ring. Pretty sure the dog also stepped on their opponent's groin in the last pin attempt. It's clear that this isn't the end of the feud.

🚨 This is serious. Ex Reform UK leader in Wales, Nathan Gill, 52, pleads guilty to accepting bribes in exchange for making pro-Russia statements in the European Parliament when serving as a UKIP MEP.

SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL IS GOING TO HAPPEN

A song to remind me of the most useful phrases I have learnt from Italian Duolingo. (Sound up)

Remember when Elon sent a mini-sub to rescue the boys from the cave in Thailand and the rescue diver said it would never work so Elon called him a pedophile? Anyway, Elon is in the Epstein files.

Musk being in the Epstein files makes him tweeting that Trump is in the Epstein files so much funnier

If anyone knows anything about this ICE agent, you can reach me on Signal at marisakabas.04

Hi Internet! I'm Drew and THIS IS MY FACE. If this GIF has ever brought you joy in the past, I humbly ask you to consider making a donation to the National MS Society. It would mean a lot to me and to those I know affected by the disease! Donate at blinkingguy.com

Forget everything you already know about America's most notorious dead person. 'Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile' is in select theaters October 2. To find a theater near you, visit: theonion.com/badpedophile

In case AI art didn't made you mad already.

Former Lib Dem leader Menzies Campbell dies aged 84

spell effects test

A very big Onion announcement: The Onion has spent the last two months working on a masterpiece. It's a documentary titled Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile. It's so good, in fact, we were set to release it in theatres nationwide on October 2nd. Then two weeks ago, Charlie Kirk was shot.

The richest man on earth owns X. The second richest man on earth is about to be a major owner of TikTok. The third richest man owns Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp. The fourth richest man owns The Washington Post. See the problem here?

The Reid Technique should be banned. PACE has proved to be more effective for the last thirty years.

Vance once called Trump "America's Hitler."

“I’m really good at this stuff.* Your countries are going to hell.” — President tRump, speaking the United Nations. *Except for pronouncing "Acetaminophen"

He steps aside as the bull is coming.

Today is the only day you can quote post this:

Hotel cancels launch event for Tommy Robinson-backed political party

Dr. Oz publicly breaks from Trump on Tylenol as he encourages pregnant women to take the drug

Kimmel has done a better job in the last few hours than the leaders of the Democrats have in the last year. The emperor has no clothes. He paints his face. He can't walk up stairs. He can't read. He can't talk. He's a rapist. He's incapable of shedding a single tear for a dead friend.

As I was saying…

Trump just threatened to sue ABC again for allowing Jimmy Kimmel back on the air, which is SUPER weird, because all of these Republicans said that the decision to pull Kimmel’s show was a “business decision.”

Kimmel: "He might have to release the Epstein files to distract us from this now."

Kimmel's show put together a montage of Trump insisting dozens of times yesterday to "DON'T TAKE TYLENOL." Complete insanity.

🧵Watch out for Nick Fuentes and the "Groyper" army. He has his own under the radar vision of white-only America and hated Charlie Kirk and Turning Point USA. Kirk's death has boosted Fuentes and his in the shadows followers. www.wired.com/story/nick-f...

Man fucking Ben Affleck returns to television youtu.be/c1tjh_ZO_tY?...

A million views in under an hour... That's about 38.5 Sinclair specials about Charlie...

More than 1800 detainees are missing after the closure of Alligator Alcatraz. Their families and lawyers can’t find them and they’ve vanished from the ICE database. Feels like this should be a much bigger story www.miamiherald.com/news/local/i...

I need a Tylenol after listening to him drone on.

Chilling echo of dictators past.

On the National Mall this morning, a new satirical statue is up celebrating Jeffrey Epstein and Trump's "friendship" in honor of National Friendship Month.

donald trump is going through full brandonization at an alarming rate

This trend, but with Candice Michelle's theme.