you underestimate my power, Charlie Brown

Each chip will require a heat sink the size of North Carolina.

if there are ten guys in the chain of command between me giving an order to do war crimes and the guy pressing the war crimes button then 12 people did war crimes. how is this hard

It is morning, blueskis.

It is morning, blueskis.

Fortnite? Not Wolfenstein?

I heard a preacher this morning saying that he used to have a lot of doubts about the faith, but then he started reading the Bible seriously and regularly, and all his doubts went away, and brother, that is some of the worst spiritual advice I’ve ever heard.

Dick Cheney claimed to be pro-life, and yet he’s not alive. Interesting.

feeling extremely good about my lifelong policy of never sending or reading an email rn

I’d give both my legs to be just chillin’ on a Halifax pier rn

Buses and trains are a capitalist conspiracy to get you to work on time. I’m not falling for it.

If you say “ohhhhhh the year was seventeen seventy eight” and she doesn’t respond, she’s not the one, dawg.

Just dance if you're caught up in the holy ghost trance If you stop, I'ma put them killer ants in your pants I'm the O-D-B as you can see FBI, don't you be watchin' me

My long-held personal political view that every president’s term should end with being marched out of the White House in chains is holding up extremely well.

these posts are not good where are the good posts

While you were studying the blade I was also studying the blade. We were in fourth period blade class together, remember?

she wink wink on my nudge nudge til I say no more

🎶Do you ever feel Like a plastic bag In a plastic bag Inside a plastic bag? CAUSE BABY YOU'RE A BAAAAAAAG OF BAGS🎶

specifying in my will that when they lay me in the coffin I need a little pillow under my knees or my legs will be eternally restless

Nice argument, unfortunately for you I've already portrayed you as the sucker MC, and myself as DJ Run.

Maybe it's COVID 🎶 Maybe it's allergies 🎶

I have had enough. I would like to live in precedented times, please.

news anchor: There is a bus with a bomb driving through the city. guy who has only seen Speed: this is just like the movie Speed

When somebody uses my driveway to turn around

J Jonah Jameson [crunching down on his cigar so hard he bites through it]: PARKER! BRING ME A PIC OF LUIGI WHERE HE DOESN’T LOOK UNBELIEVABLY BEAUTIFUL OR…YOU’RE FIRED!!!

I’m at the huge walk. I’m at the guest suite. I’m at the combination huge walk/guest suite.

I don't think I've ever talked on Bluesky about why I hate the Foo Fighters and Dave Grohl. Don't read any further unless you're prepared for uncomfortable truths about the "Nicest Guy in Rock", and his very substantial body count & subsequent cover-up.

they should invent an adhd pill you don’t have to remember to take

J Jonah Jameson [crunching down on his cigar so hard he bites through it]: PARKER! BRING ME A PIC OF LUIGI WHERE HE DOESN’T LOOK UNBELIEVABLY BEAUTIFUL OR…YOU’RE FIRED!!!

girl with the DAGRON tattoo

getting up this morning to go to the gym for the first time in a month like

Decided “My Home Town” would be a nice way to wrap up tonight’s practice session on the pipes.

Y’all…she’s singing Vivaldi’s Four Seasons: Winter in solfège In other words, she’s practicing her violin part (to memorize it) by singing do-re-mi- (etc) for the corresponding musical notes I…I didn’t know this was a thing OR EVEN POSSIBLE

gimme yule gimme fire don me now with gay attire

getting up this morning to go to the gym for the first time in a month like

A few days ago someone in a knitting group I’m in posted an ai picture of a sweater and asked where they could find a pattern for it. After being told repeatedly that it was ai, they said they knew but surely there must be a pattern to knit it. Somebody showed Trump an ai generated ballroom.

Detached Bungalow is a term for a nice little house in Britain that sounds like an absolutely devastating insult in Britain

Watching the Falcons game and shaking my head the whole time so the people in this Buffalo Wild Wings know I disagree with it

It is morning, blueskis.

A cup of ambition? In this economy???

RA👏DA👏 RA👏RA👏RADDA RA👏👏👏

I showed you my chakra please respond

Next hit him with some butter, sugar, and salt and turn this creep into a crepe.

Clear eyes, strong floor, no ceiling.

you underestimate my power, Charlie Brown

‘You boy! How do I unsubscribe from all these Black Friday emails?’

It is morning, blueskis.

Decided “My Home Town” would be a nice way to wrap up tonight’s practice session on the pipes.