when i was a kid i always found it unrealistic that padme died of a "broken heart" after luke and leia were born. but now i think it's actually the most realistic thing ever, that a society with flying spaceships and shit still has absolutely no idea how to, like, care for a postpartum woman

we've come up with a system where you can demonstrate growth to shareholders by hiring more people than you should, but also you can demonstrate growth by firing more people than you should. we call it the economy and we think it's going to be great

If we're doing game design doc discourse, I highly, highly recommend following this template from @kchironis.bsky.social

ADAM, TURNING TO GOD: i feel like you could have roped me into this process sooner, there's critical context i'm missing. can you include my department at an earlier step next time?

medieval peasants: what grand works do ye bring of the future, lady me, holding up phone: so it’s a soulslike extraction friendslop with twitch integration and collector elements peasant: and doth it bring joy ? me: oh definitely, for like 4 hours yeah

always so funny to me when people are like “how am I supposed to explain Gay to my kids?” my kid asks me way harder shit all the time. “why did they build the road this way? why are some people bad?” I don’t know. please ask me about Gay

I made a map of 3.4 million Bluesky users - see if you can find yourself! bluesky-map.theo.io I've seen some similar projects, but IMO this seems to better capture some of the fine-grained detail

why is game dev feedback always kinda like this

Wild that there was an open lane called "what if we just explain things clearly to people?" and he's the first one to ever fill it

i tagged you in that thread. i expanded the DM into a channel. i ported the DM to the thread and then turned the thread into a huddle. i'm operating on planes of existence you've never even heard of. i'm speaking holy tongues to the angels, in the huddle. the huddle is pinging you. join the huddle

protect your peace. right click Slack > mark all as read. namaste

Heartbreaking: Kindest, Gentlest Person You Know Is Just A Real Fuckin Sociopath In Arc Raiders

They say imitation crab is the sincerest form of crab

something that goes against everything in my nature…? yes, it’s being asked to insert Screw G into Hole B as depicted on page 11 of the booklet. i respectfully believe that is an insane ask and i rebuke it. why is this dollhouse installed backwards and upside down? please, no further questions

If there's one thing I hate to taste, it's my own medicine. Of all the things I want taste, my own medicine ranks dead last. I'd taste any medicine you threw at me unless it's my own. I hate it when my friends are tasting my medicine and they're like "oh this is so good you should try some"—fuck off

We may still see a few more layoffs added for 2025 as I learn of ones I may have missed (there are always some of those) or new ones emerge (not all regions take the last weeks of the month off) but a few more won't make a dramatic change now so behold the state of games industry layoffs. 🧵

alternative math curriculum for game developers: - probabilities and loot tables, aka If you Fuck This Up Your Endgame Playerbase Will Be So Mad At You, Pay Attention - physics, aka Oh God Is The Player Stuck In That Wall Again - vector math, aka Bullet Logic Is Mostly Raycasts Honestly

as someone who likes nintendo a normal amount, i cannot compare to my friends who are advanced nintendo likers. "did you play Super Toad's Toothbrush Gala? i thought it wasn't as good as Yoshi's Colonoscopy but better than Paper Mario Dark Academia"

i can’t do tutorial sections anymore. i need gameplay right now. i need you to pile every system into my brain immediately. i need the video game tutorial equivalent of being knocked over the head with a crowbar, only to wake up in Cancun with one kidney and my venmo fully drained. just fuck me up

they just nerfed your boss fight dude. yep they gave you more startup on your attack. all the people who beat you pre-nerf are gonna boast about it. sorry man.

(holding up the phone to my 3yo) these women sealed the honmoon long before huntrix ever existed 3yo: what are their names me: this is scary spice, there’s also posh, baby, sporty and ginger

😈 Maleficent, the evil queen, had her goblins searching for Sleeping Beauty for 16 years. 🛑 BUT…. they were looking for a baby the whole time. Acceptance criteria fail! 🧠 This is why it’s so important for villains to leverage AGILE practices. Don’t let this become your team. My new ecourse will

me, curled up in fetal position, sick, prepping for 4 thanksgivings and 8 holiday events: i’m alive but please— no more the universe, kicking me in the ribs with her glittery heels: get up bitch. you need to somehow secure a pumpkin pie for your kid’s class thanksgiving party by tomorrow morning

friday soapbox: as a designer, if you want something to be a skillful action for players, and you want growth in this skill to be very deep/meaningful, then you need to also let players be bad at it. sometimes horrendously bad. players hate this pain, and designers often want to mitigate it away.

it's on miro. it's literally on figma. you have to log into okta. it's in jira. it's on zoom. it's on pureref. it's on flow. it's on perforce. it's on slack. you can find it on slack. you can go to slack and find it. log onto slack right now. you can slack it. slack has it for you. it's on slack.

the developers clowning around in chat vs the producer who is desperately trying to keep this team ritual on the rails and get everyone to pay attention

Just friendly advice for the Dodgers fans: most fans of other teams are going to be rooting for the Jays no matter what, embrace the villain role and you will be much happier than trying unsuccessfully to convince everyone else that the Dodgers are the heroes everyone should root for

never invite a group of game dev parents to a “digital lab” toddler play place, i promise you we will be insufferable. why is this art wall stuttering and running at 10fps? how come the grass in the frog minigame is like 30k polys? is nobody doing the gameplay clarity work here???

sorry i can't respond to your text right now, i am in hell! aka 10 minutes into a 45 minute unreal engine tutorial video on some obscure part of the tech pipeline where a guy is mumbling rapid fire instructions over a dubstep backtrack

the older i get the more i think there might only be 3 kinds of millennial midlife crisis: Vans Warped Tour, Funkopop, and Making Sous Vide Your Entire Personality

pleased to announce that there seems to be a passive-aggressive conflict roiling the august pages of Cooks Illustrated, Fall Harvest recipes edition. allow me to explain:

level designer and gameplay designer: our friendship is strong. we're not playing your little game design lead in a Saw mask: oh you can leave anytime, but first you have to agree about what kinds of ramps are allowed in this game (level designer and gameplay designer look at each other in horror)

Los Angeles came out in droves. #NoKings

most annoying part of having a baby is how everyone you know is all "can I see the baby" "where's the baby" "I don't see the baby" "is there actually a baby" "I don't mean to imply anything" "it's just that... You've been different lately" "ever since you fainted during that weird electrical storm"

developer: put it down. we don't need another one concept artist: (clutching tighter) no. this is my emotional support sky whale

Learned that I am being laid off from Heart Machine, and will be leaving the studio later this month. Do you need a contractor? I've got a track record of leading scope-friendly script revisions late in dev. I have also done a lot of consulting on new IPs and pitches/demos. Feel free to DM me!

every expedition 33 journal is like “sadly, our attempts at kitesurfing into the final boss failed” “we tried dabbing on the nevrons and we’re completely out of ideas” “will we ever be free of this tyranny”

it's normal to walk around with the fiscal quarter end dates burned into your brain so that you know exactly which weeks to be most anxious about bad industry news, right

the marshmallow test for game developers, except every day you come into work there's a big button saying JUST ADD A HOOKSHOT TO THE GAME and you have to exert every single ounce of free will to stop yourself from pushing it

i just think if you’re hot, you shouldn’t have to learn how to parry

(holding up tablet) and here you can see the oldest known human writing, it's about one hundred billion years old. it's a message written by a designer to their engineer, begging the engineer to build them something and explaining "it'll be simple"

you: what are we having for dinner game designer: great question. i wrote some pillars to help us align on a good outcome here. you, reading: wait, this pillar is just "food must be edible," that seems pretty vague game designer: ah, that's where the secondary pillars about Edibility come into play

every JRPG for some reason: …and that’s why on the 17th of the coldest month, all our children must be frozen to death and fed to demons, begging for their lives JRPG: anyway, here’s a minigame where you can teach a dog how to runway model while some bubbly EDM track plays in the background

i have a lot of issues trusting folks and being vulnerable with them. i realized recently-- it's because i frankly do not ask them to go on enough quests for me. i need them to go find a gas canister and some food to prove i can trust them. or go kill my rivals' leader in that base over there

used to do duolingo for French until I started Expedition 33. now armed with my new arsenal of curse words, i’m well equipped for the Parisian vacation of my dreams

sometimes i wonder why i don’t have energy for a DnD campaign right now. then i have nights like tonight where i, a foreign queen hosting a banquet, must convince the “flower princess” (my 3yo) that she should eat protein. this is of course so she can prepare for the coming flower war

every dev team has 1 guy who looks like he would probably stab and/or fistfight you if you met him in a dark alley, but then during some meeting he'll be like "sorry brb, one of my 23 cats knocked over my bonsai collection and it fell into the artisanal tea jar"

Travis Kelce originally planned to propose next week, but moved it forward to avoid the Silksong release window.

pov: you are on your deathbed. you've lived a good long life. no regrets. your family and friends have all come to pay their respects. they've left now and things are quiet and calm. tim sweeney is also there for some reason. he has something to say to you. he whispers: navmesh needs to be rebuilt