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Everything is so stupid

I love how no matter how many times I update my AlertsDC profile, I still fail to receive alerts for things like, you know, a military flyover in downtown DC. At least this time I knew Charles was here so I connected the dots quickly. Sheesh.

This one is a flyover for the King of England to *checks notes* commemorate the 250th anniversary of rebelling against the King of England.

Pour one out for the Hilton staff who are working perhaps the worst shift in food service history rn.

Is there someone dead in the lobby or is there someone in custody? Was the person armed or not? Did he make it into the ballroom or not? Usually there should be a pretty wide grace period on finding this out, but there are literally hundreds of reporters in the room and nobody knows shit.

DEVASTATED to report that I forgot my DC flag for tonight’s @washingtonspirit.com game. I’ve brought it every game since the federal agent and national guard occupation. WHOOPSIE.

Please do not ask bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.

WHAT IS ON FIRE IN DC

When you stop eating fast food your supply of car napkins plummets.

'SWIMS' upside down is still 'SWIMS.'

For fuck's sake, sign up for The Onion, and get a free limited edition IW tote. A share of merch sales will go to the Sandy Hook families, which will be the first time they get any money since they filed this lawsuit eight years ago. Legal fees have been insane. Please sign up and help us out!

Just a thought: How about we stop shaming the poor for buying things that may not be essential, and start shaming the rich for making a profit off things that are essential?

Want to support #WomeninSTEM? Don’t hold back an invite for something bc they’re pregnant/ just had a baby/ have a small child. People always say they’ll invite “later” but later never comes- let me lean on my support network and figure it out instead! 🔭🧪

Flour comes from a plant, sugar comes from a plant, and chocolate comes from a plant. So, basically a chocolate chip cookie is a salad. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk

#Tagtuesday #Streetart My grandson is in an arts middle school on his way to an arts high school. His graduation class painted this nural.

BREAKING: Maryland is about to become the first state in the nation to ban the use of surveillance data and dynamic pricing at grocery stores. The Maryland House has just passed the Protection from Predatory Pricing Act. Governor Wes Moore plans to sign the bill.

Could everything just...not...for a while?

caffeine is perfect when you're having trouble concentrating and would rather be having trouble concentrating while vibrating

I am choosing to believe they are more entertained by making the microphone spin and do tricks…

Lmfao he is lying to these astronauts as he talks to them while they are space

New over here so introducing myself with some commentary on Artemis II!

So, to sum up, a couple of days ago Christina Koch became the first woman to see Earth in its entirety, and today – right now, in fact – she is the first woman to see the Moon up close, and the first woman to see the far side. 🥹

Y'all there is a woman and a black man circling the moon and NASA's mission control+ science teams are so diverse and people are nerding out about science and exploration this is all a gigantic middle finger to the stupid and hate and grotesque ghouls running our country

NASA #Artemis II flyby coverage schedule; all times in Eastern. You can follow along live on NASA+ (plus.nasa.gov) or on the NASA YouTube channel (www.youtube.com/@NASA). It should be amazing to watch!

IF BERGER HAD SCORED THAT!! 😳 #NWSL

NWSL should cancel their broadcast agreement with CBS for splitting the screen in the middle of a half to air a commercial. Absolutely vile.

who else feels like they’re doing too much and not enough simultaneously

NASA is honestly one of the greatest things humans have ever created, the stuff of math and dreams

Yeah I hated the propaganda video but hearing each astronaut ahead of the 10 minute countdown has me crying. #ArtemisII #NASA

This is a Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson appreciation post. That is all! 💕🙏

4:06 pm: Area being monitored for potential of a severe storm watch, although NWS currently not favoring issuing one. Modest moisture means any severe weather is probably somewhat isolated. Scattered storms still a threat into evening. Details at cwg.live.

Ketanji Brown Jackson was the only dissenter in the conversion therapy case 😞 It's so upsetting, and I just want to remind folks that Trans Lifeline is a resource you should take advantage of right now if you need it. Your life is precious. +1-877-565-8860 translifeline.org

From 80 to 49 in 24 hours 📉 A 31 degree drop in D.C. -- courtesy of major cold front #4 in ~2.5 weeks. March has zero chill… except when it suddenly does. Lows tonight: upper 20s to low 30s. Details and updated forecast at cwg.live

I just suggested the daycare center I sent kid #1 to as a solution for someone. I paid $650 a month. I knew it had gone up, but they are usually considered the affordable option. So let's say $7800 a year. It's almost $19,000 a year now. In Central Illinois. No one's having babies.

Casey Trees cherry blossom map has arrived! So many beauties right here in Kingman Park 😍 🌸 experience.arcgis.com/experience/9...

Croix had a great KC debut. Happy for her. 😭😭

I have watched 6 hours of a DOGE bro deposition. The whole thing, start to finish. It's a fascinating, and horrifying, look at the people who caused so much damage, didn't really achieve anything at all, while still being so sure they are right. Here's what they said: www.404media.co/i-watched-6-...

Is it the two allergy meds kicking in or IS IT THE SNOW and wild temp drop that has made my eyes stop itching and sinus headache subside? We will truly never know!! #dcwx #washingtondc

I’m so excited to celebrate the start of the NWSL season tomorrow at Rowdy Audi!

This puts me at 10 people released. I filed my 1st habeas petition 29 days ago. I am an incredibly small-time, nobody lawyer who knew nothing about immigration law the day I submitted that case. I barely know any more today. I had never sued the federal government and now I've beaten them 10 times.

Every year, twice a year, I very confidently think a one hour time change will not fuck me up. And every year, twice a year, I am wrong… (She whispers: but yayyy sun!)

No big deal, just the winningest SheBelieve Cup player in tournament history, Emily Sonnett 🏆

congrats to alyssa thompson on her doctorate degree from the christen press school of shooting

I love that we are finally celebrating Tobin and I love how comfortable she now is in front of the camera. #TobinHeath #USWNT

HAPPY USWNT GAME DAY TO ALL WHO CELEBRATE ⚽

it's friday.✌🏽if you made it to today, keep going.♥️

Weird chart. What happened in 2025 in the US? Did political leadership change and then start systematically dismantling education, science, health care, and government, levying arbitrary tariffs, randomly attacking major US cities, and destroying the economy? Just asking.

[Exit Murderer.]