"Get his ass” Is so unreasonably funny to me. A huge win for the English language. Today's version of "seize him" imo

Had a great convo this week where I introduced someone to the term “passive suicidal ideation” and he hadn’t had a word before for his experiences. So I thought I’d take this moment to share with everyone in case it missed you too. theoutline.com/post/7267/li...

Fuck it, I’m supposed to be cleaning and packing: If you see this post, do it too! Pronouns: She/they Height 5' 6” Shoe: 9 Zodiac: Capricorn Smoke: only when I’m drunk, and only cloves like an art freshman Tattoos: 2 Piercings: 6 Fave drinks: London Fog, a Penicillin

I’m still just confused how anyone my age looks at a 20-year-old and doesn’t see unseasoned raw chicken. Teens look like a different species to me! Or like one of those early AI images with too many fingers!

Grey’s Anatomy is the perfect argument both for and against polyamory. Most of their personal problems would be fixed if they just formed a few polycules. But these people cannot be trusted to communicate, so there would be all new personal problems.

Amazing, no notes, I do not desire to learn anything else about this story, for it would only detract from the perfection on this headline.

(spending 9 billion dollars to make a robot say "i have always loved you") hard times create strong men

What are your top 5 movie genres? Mine are: -Quirky assassin romantic comedy -Legal case about a piece of art -Action movie but for the female gaze -Modern Classics Adaptation with messy teens and a female lead -Surprise! it’s gay!

You have discovered a planet. It is teeny, with molten seas. It is beyond the sunrise. What a good land.

I keep thinking people are talking about Trump disliking Magic The Gathering. I am not awake enough today.

My mom just sent me this in preparation for me flying tomorrow night…

I suspect there’s a deep and unacknowledged fear of disability and a refusal to face one’s own vulnerability at work here

STILL READY #art #digitalart #illustration

I got off a plane last week and immediately set up an appointment with a tv repair guy, washed the bath mat, and replaced some batteries. I have never felt more like a house mother.

The angel on my shoulder: No, I didn't say you COULDN'T fit all the flags onto one pair of shoes, just that you SHOULDN'T The devil on my shoulder: Bet.

Last night was just a bunch of writers drinking for free at a bar, so of course in devolved into comparing the merits of different Star Treks.

Finally someone explains sportsball in a language I understand: kitty scritchies.

We need a matchmaking service to pair authors with screenwriters so they can get all weird and funky with their adaptations.

If you'd LET THEM FINISH, ghosts are saying "boobs."

The importance of being Genuine and Authentic is a great excuse for me being exactly as unhinged in person as I am online. People who hire me to write get to see me poking Greg like an annoying sister IN REAL LIFE too!

If you can't handle me at my unhinged posting behavior you don't deserve me at my industry professional.

and I heard a voice saying to the sixth angel which had the trumpet, Loose the four angels which are bound in the great river Euphrates. and the four angels were loosed, which were prepared for an hour, and a day, and a month, and a year, for to slay the third part of men

After all the KBBQ talk, seemed like a perfect rainy day for a trip with friends. cc @vivaciousvandal.bsky.social @gregmachlin.bsky.social

no more of this "their friends talk them out of vicious bloodthirsty revenge" stuff in fiction. I wanna see a villain get PULPED

Wanna read about a powerful villain meeting a violent end? Here are my books where that happens! I’ll thread links and details below. Other authors feel free to quote with your books

I’m so tired that I genuinely thought for a second I was drunk, but all I had tonight was a Coca Cola.

Stranded in Nashville. Sucks for the airport staff who aren’t allowed to say “not our fault, fuck Trump!” when they clearly want to.

One of my favorite things is making up fake movies/shows that would exist within the universe of the real thing we're writing. I'm now re-using "Teen Millionaire Lifeguard Academy" as a fake show, which implies that "Date Crimes" and "Dark Academia" share a universe.

Somebody should buy one of my circuses so I can keep giving away the bread. …Or let’s just riot. Both (not either) would work for me. Both is good.

Having one of those weeks where I just have zero appetite and every meal is a force-feeding, but it happens to be the week I have a per diem to cover eating many delicious things. Rude, body. Rude.

It is objectively funny how many Dunkin Donuts are in Logan Airport. We aren’t even trying to beat these charges, eh?

Dream blunt rotation.

When you’re sitting in the back of the bus near the bathroom just hoping no one is crazy enough to need it on a 2-hour drive. Then hoping he just has to pee. Then when it’s silent you’re just chanting “please be doing cocaine, please be doing cocaine” because at least coke doesn’t leave a smell.

Joyce Carol Oates sitting across a desk from Kendrick Lamar: "So I'm putting a team together..." Isaac Chotiner knocks on the open door.

By some miracle I made my bus, so I’ll be in Boston in two hours, and from thence LA so long as there are enough air traffic controllers to keep us going.

Sweater weather is so conflicting. I look real cute in a big cozy sweater but also how will anyone know that I have cool tattoos

motivations and politics aside, moderate democrats must suck at strategic board games

Judith Beheading Holofernes, by Caravaggio, 1599

the brain worms are winning tonight, but I have a giant fuzzy hoodie, a cat in a sweater, unlimited internet access to comics, and enough buspirone to chill out an elephant if he happens to have an anxiety disorder.

I read a lot of manwha with happy endings where nobody dies and everyone learns to communicate, but the current one I'm reading has pretty horrific murders and suicide and gross travesties, and it is reminding me more of how I write. ...Oops?

Ms. Rachel 2028

Mamdani is going to implement "Sharing Is Caring" Law. Everyone is going to have to "It Can Be Fun".