Any episode of this podcast presented by Hollywood Steve is guaranteed to be great, and this one hit me right in my nostalgic sweet spot. If you’re not listening, this is a great place to jump on board.

BREAKING: Following the American threat of an “Avignon Papacy,” Robert Kennedy has begun a Diet of Worms

For the official record, these are the top three blues songs ever: 3. “Bad to the Bone” (in montages where children get makeovers to look tough) 2. The Big Show’s WWE entrance theme 1. Bruce Willis’s Seagram Golden Wine Coolers jingle

This is the part of John Mulaney’s routine where the horse loose in the hospital announces he’s going to run towards the baby incubators and smash them with his hooves.

My traditional Easter reading, from James Tate.

Huge missed opportunity that they never made the Honky Tonk Man the King of the Ring. He would have drawn enormous heel heat with his insufferable boasting of being both that and the king of rock and roll.

Gentle parenting isn’t for effective childrearing. It’s for when other parents are looking.

As seen in:

Every time I see Mac’s mom on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, I think, “Hey! John Prine!”

Josh Shapiro wants your children to learn how to write swear words.

I don’t know why it took me until now to realize that Perez Hilton looks like David Johansen (except, I guess, because I spent most of the 2000s trying not to think of Perez Hilton, and then no one at all thought of him in the 2010s).

I’m delighted my younger child has started getting into Diary of a Wimpy Kid series because that means another round of trolling by calling it “Diarrhea of a Wimpy Kid.”

The Mueller RIPort

Chuck Norris doesn’t negotiate with terrorists. The terrorists negotiate with Chuck Norris—on favorable terms as he is a close personal friend of their leader, Israel PM Benjamin Netanyahu, who has outstanding warrants from the International Criminal Court for war crimes and crimes against humanity.

Mostly I just remember doing Chuck Norris jokes that were about his sincerely held views. Like, “Chuck Norris doesn’t have a chin under his beard, just another man who doesn’t think that gay kids should be in Boy Scouts”

What’s the best song about an old river that just keeps rolling along? My problematic fave is still “Old Man River.”

I felt a great disturbance, as if millions of unfunny voices suddenly cried out in tediousness and were suddenly silenced.

We veer into a little non-Lightning territory today as former maniging editor Acha sits down with @juliedicaro.bsky.social to talk about the US Men's hockey team. #NHL

I’ll never understand people who post things like “I’ll never understand how — works” and subsequently posts about how anyone mansplaining — to her when she didn’t ask for it catches an automatic mute. You kind of implied the question!

A timely warning to locals considering fighting alongside US forces in their foreign wars: They will not return your loyalty. They will not match your commitment. They will not honor their promises.

These are the kind of race based negotiations I’m here for.

I don’t think it’s asking too much for these novelty tees for aging hipsters to have the extra little bit of irony to say “I’m too old for this shirt.”

Kind of agree that this would have fit right in with the Kobe legacy of pretending that he was the best at things

I think it’s a better tribute to Kobe to keep going when you’ve been told to stop

My wife gave away my spot to our female dog and shrugged off my complaint at this betrayal with “Hos before bros,” and I have to grudgingly respect that.

Happy birthday to all the women out there

Happy Gary Retrograde everyone! The next two weeks are the only two weeks out of the year when Gary Numan is older than Gary Oldman

Just saw a 74-year-old scan of an article from my hometown paper about the NHL debut of local star Leo “Nig” Boivin, and … uh … anyone want to explain that nickname?

Trickle Down Photonics isn't real.

Reminder that most of this daylight we’re supposedly “saving” will go straight into Baby Boomers’ pockets and the rest of us will never see any of it.

I love the part of springing forward to Daylight Saving Time every year when I wake up at exactly the same time that I always do and think, “Holy shit! Why did I sleep so late?! I’m a fucking loser!!!”

second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard

Despite all his age, he is still just a brat unassuaged.

modern day slang is starting to sound like stuff the mutants would say in The Dark Knight Returns. “Leader don’t jestermaxx on Batman. Leader say he mogged Batman”

all-timer sports graphic dropped

Hmm. You know who ELSE wanted to appeal to voters as a party of working people but had some unpleasant Nazi associations?

Charlie’s apartment on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia has the same aesthetic as Barth’s restaurant on You Can’t Do That on Television.

When I need to politely excuse myself to use the facilities.

Before you say he needs to be stripped of the FIFA Peace Prize and that lady’s Nobel, please remember: If you stop eight small wars, you’re allowed to start one big one.

He was against a school lunch program to feed starving children in his own district

the party that wants to require ID to vote abruptly invalidating a thousand people’s IDs overnight seems like a pretty giant flashing red light

stop calling us nazis just because we are invalidating IDs and rounding people up based on their skin color and putting them in concentration camps and sending them off to foreign gulags and using all that nazi imagery and banning books and dont forget about all the pedophilia. so just stop alright

Dude in my neighborhood who parks his Cybertruck so it extends over the sidewalk is in for a surprise today

There’s just no useful reason that gender assigned at birth needs to be on a driver’s license. Mine has my weight from when I first learned to drive on it, and that’s a long way from accurate as well.