Hurrah! It’s cos I’m back hahahahaha Calling all Quatermass fans…

Man, you lads are way off.

Avoiding the tumble drier in the inner city.

I've only had one flatmate. We started civil & then, over six months, we gradually fell out. Everything they did started to irritate me. I remember seeing the guy having his breakfast. "Look at that cunt." I thought, deeply & sincerely annoyed. "Eating toast." An emotional rubicon had been crossed.

www.ganymede.tv/2026/03/obit... That'll be the definitive obituary for Red Dwarf co-creator Rob Grant

The right's messaging on defeat ("this is illegitimate!") is in fact the same as their messaging on victory ("You lost, we won, get over it.") It's the pursuit of power, only.

Wait, Britain has politics as well?? Christ, when will it end

I like to pay exactly £4 for tops with 90s Rap Albums on them, so I tend to open AliExpress emails. This was in today's. I wish Puzo had written an incident where Vito sat before a Citizen Kane like image of himself, an arm on the floor in front, and the suspicion he might be an auton ever present

In honour of Rob Grant, here's the bonus episode @danielharper.bsky.social & I did with @jameslatrmurphy.bsky.social on the Red Dwarf novel.

cut in Chicago 100 years ago on this date: a wonderful, joyous, swinging record. Armstrong was far from being the first to scat, but he did it masterfully here. Nothing would be the same afterward for Armstrong, for jazz, for US pop music: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ksmG...

It's weird, isn't it? That there was a man who enjoyed the closest possible proximity to power and everyone basically knew him as The Evil Guy. For years. Who's that? Oh, that's Mandy. We all call him The Evil Guy. What? Why? Tsk. Cos of all the evil, silly!

New CEO put in place purely to be accountable for the crap pulled by their predecessor? We call that a Dönitzing.

I'm named after my Uncles, who were each named after Irish Republican martyrs. James (Connolly) Michael (Collins) Charles (Stewart Parnell) Murphy. I like 'em fine.

Obsessed with that Andew photo. It's a man seeing every load bearing stone of the way he fundamentally understood the universe to exist ripped violently away. The only way I could achieve an expression like that is if I'd woken up on the Planet of the fucking Apes.

Young man just cycled fast past me on the street, on the phone. Beautiful patois influenced working class accent. "Pick you up at what three, fam? Three pm?" (Beat) "How do you not know what three pm is?!"

On the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, which I will keep watching full episodes of in bed til YouTube runs dry, a magician was on whose whole act was cigarette based. It felt endless. Carzini was his name and I could not find out if he died of something respiratory related, which is unsatisfying.

I've seen Spinal Tap dozens of times and had no idea that Anjelica Huston, Dana Carvey, and Paul Shaffer owned the faces I'd seen so many times.

The Death of Ivan Illyich has taught me that we were robbed of Norm MacDonald quietly locating the toughest of chuckles from Tolstoy books on Audible.

Anglo saxon burial mask in the windowsill salt. Did you grow up without bowls of salt on your windows or are you normal?

New avi. He's hip. He's cool. He's 36 years old.

When I come back to find the washing machine having juddered out of his usual spot, I'm annoyed but I also have to respect his refusal to be tamed.

Andrew Rankin RIP. A tasteful and versatile drummer and, arguably, the best singer in the Pogues. youtube.com/clip/UgkxSbc...

Age verification? When I was a kid, this was our social media.

Looking forward to not being blitzed out of my head on edible for only one reason: 1) To find out if the idea I just had is a game changer for behavioural psychology Or, like all the other ideas I've had while high, merely amazing, well worth implementing, not dangerous incoherent nonsense, etc.

👍✨All good!!✨👍

We know that if Elon was a poster like dril, he'd be at peace & would leave us in the same. For Trump, a couple generations older, he would only have found satisfaction if he could be Regis. Cackling with Joan Rivers. "Oh, you're so wicked!" Sadly for us all they're the least witty men to ever live.

At the British SNL writer's table, 2026.

De La Soul Is Dead is the peak of art created by nice guys desperate to show they're tough, too. It's in the same quality ballpark as the debut, but you feel the studious screwface through all of it.

POLONIUS: ...and purchase not calendars as the ash of the year drops to tallow. Nor within the several bright following dawns! Wait, instead, until at least the fifth eve of January, my boy. Sellers will reduce prices for their perishable stock, yet would you have use for them prior to that day?

That's on me. That's my fault for expecting good burritos in a Cobham service station on Christmas eve.

How great is it that we can see extinct animals in cave paintings? Big old dead aurochs, visible to us through the artistic eye of a prehistoric artist. Magic.

GEN X RAP SNOB: In my day, we sampled records made with REAL instruments.

RZA's ballet score is beautiful on its own terms. It's also fascinating on the meta level because he's swaggeringly confident in the new form. We still hear the artist who looped soul records with dialogue from kung fu films on 36 Chambers. It isn't hip hop at all, but the spirit's easy to feel.

'Tis the season for M! R! James!

Don't want to hear the reality. This is Sir Mix a Lot crashing an orchestral evening, the musicians spontaneosly bursting into Baby Got Back, and a room full of socialites losing their minds on hearing the song for the first time. Many a monacle dropped. Give me this much. youtu.be/w59e20ijOpE?...

Starting to feel like good odds that the last coherent thought that fires across my dying synapses will be 01818118181.

The Princess Bride and Spinal Tap are two of my favourite films of all times. If either was starting right now, I'd watch to the end. Reiner as a director was unflashy. He didn't have much of a recognisable visual style. He just made the best film in the style that suited the story.

📌 ciaraioch.com is now taking Christmas orders for prints, cards, and vouchers - each archival-quality print on heavy art paper is made in Ireland, ships internationally in eco-friendly packaging with discount tracked postage, and comes with a FREE card and treats for every customer 🎁 #SpéirGorm

"And now we come to 'people I worked with 30 years ago who objected, in the most mild terms, to my decade long, monomaniacal campaign of targeted abuse against a vulnerable minority, targeting countless specific individuals and the group as a whole.' Some real bastards in here!"

So I pull the sleigh Looking for the answer Am I Rudolph Or am I Prancer

Marlon Brando 🤝Superman III Got wrecked by Richard Pryor

This one got me.

Not on the Wikipedia for 'Dub Be Good to Me,' so it's been wiped from history to an extent. Check the music mags at the time & find Norman Cook, Housemartins member, DJ, & architect of the single spend a few weeks claiming the bassline came from "...an old ska record..." youtu.be/-MnELifX3sQ?...

Spotify wrapped must be madly off. What kind of a lunatic would have an obscure 1980s Bob Dylan outtake as their number one listened-to song for 2025?

A guitar loving man came round my house with the rest of his band. He looked at my battered, charity shop acoustic, used up like a toddler's favourite soft toy. "If you file down the neck, [several other helpful, intelligent suggestions that I stopped listening to] you'd find it plays better."

Woke up excited for new socks. We've got money to replace socks now. They're bright red, like Neville Staples said sixties Rudies wore. Felt a twang of boring bastardry but reassured myself by echoing Capone in Mamet's script out loud. "A man's got to have enthusiasms... enthusiasms..." "What?"

Disney+ has given me the chance to watch The Golden Girls for the first time since I was an infant on my nan's knee and it's great. As overused as murder's become as a story engine, I'd watch any of the main characters, solo, together, or in any combination, solving crimes and travelling the U.S.