The This is Your Life reboot is a bit shit.

What idiot called it ‘The FIFA Peace Prize’ and not the ‘Ballon D’War’?

Look, Netflix can go and do whatever they like with Warner Bros, just as long as they bring back this logo:

Ru-roh

I think Fallon ruffling Trump’s hair like he was a little scamp was rock bottom, but this is a very close second.

Remember Freddie as F.R.0.7? No, of course you don’t, because I’m the only loser on the planet that’s watched it. Anyway, in the UK cut, there’s a scene in this CHILDREN’S ANIMATED MOVIE where Daffers, a human, FLASHES HER TITS at Freddie, a frog. British animation, the best in the world.

I’m just saying that if Sepp Blatter can not only criticise you but make valid points as well, then you should probably look at yourself in the mirror.

Is Netflix buying WB how Disney finally gets its hands on Batman? Because I don’t see Netflix wanting to run a comic publisher, and realistically, who else could afford to buy DC?

His performance absolutely defined Shang Tsung. I'm so glad NetherRealm brought him back to reprise his role in Mortal Kombat 11 to ham it up before he left us.

Friday.

All I can say about the terrestrial TV Christmas Day schedules is that they’ve clearly conceded Christmas Day to the next batch of Stranger Things episodes. Cowards.

Not Larry 😢

He's cinema's Morrissey.

Wednesday

Oh @rianjohnson.bsky.social played all innocent "I'm not doing a muppet thing with Knives Out" he knew HE KNEW

Can't wait for my local chip shop to be under government control.

Tuesday

It’s taken a few weeks, but Toby has finally accepted a new dog in the house.

The Snowman (1982, Channel Four)

I love how all the Air Force One interviews with Trump look like he’s just coming out of the toilet after a horrific dump.

Monday

‘I've seen things you fuckin’ people wouldn't fuckin’ believe. Fuckin’ attack ships on fuckin’ fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the fuckin’ dark near the fuckin’ Tannhäuser Gate. All those fuckin’ moments will be lost in time, like tears in fuckin’ rain. Time to die.’

How do I tell my family I’d like to spend the rest of my birthday alone?

There are worst ways to spend your fortieth birthday. #Panto

40

I’m spending my last night in my thirties watching this shower of shite.

Imagine posing for a photographer friend who sells your image to iStock and a year later, you see this is what The Washington Post has done with the image of you walking on a beautiful fall day

I’ve seen a few films this week with British actors talking in horrendous American accents. It makes me long for the days when Sean Connery could play a Spanish-Egyptian or a Russian in a Scottish accent.

Friday.

for a modest fee I will comment “ai slop” on your ex boyfriend’s selfie

Thursday.

That time Zendaya looked like she’d just come from work having busted a gang of bank robbers with the flying squad in 1976

Gammons like to complain about being stereotyped as bald, red-faced, middle-aged men, but every time one of these cunts is in the news for being a racist piece of shit, it’s a bald, red-faced, middle-aged man 99.9% of the time.

Bluesky is like Thought For The Day, but the topic is always bought round to Doctor Who rather than Jesus.

Oh, so the Paramount buying Warner Bros. deal really is just straight up done then. We're just waiting for the pageant to arrive at its predetermined and rigged conclusion.

I’ve listened to three different podcasts this week, and all three have been waxing lyrical about Rivals, so I’m giving it a watch. It’s rather horny, isn’t it?

You can’t throw milkshakes at politicians if you can’t afford to buy them.

James Cameron’s right that Netflix is bad for cinemas and would be bad for Warner Bros., but having fewer cinema releases doesn’t matter as much to me as capitulating to a fascist paedophile’s every demand.

Bringing up Farage being a racist won't shift any opinions on him. Pushing him on the fact his close associates take Russian money will.

Tuesday

Why are the films on ITVX the TV edit? I’ve just tried watching Lethal Weapon, and every instance of the word ‘fuck’ is muted.

You'll be visited by three spirits." The three spirits:

‘What are you doing step-mouse?’

Monday

A film so warm and grumpy it feels like being hugged and insulted at the same time. #Filmsky