First Secretary of Defense you could defeat by painting a tunnel on the side of a boulder.

Ooft, Arsenal 🔥

Man, I’m kind of sorry for being such a smartass today but let me promise you this one thing it will happen again

Accidentally went out earlier without my phone and have been phone free for 6 and a half hours. Reckon I’ve got a guardian article about “my digital detox” in me

oh, that's... that's not... you can't call it that

Watched this yesterday and it is absolutely beautiful. Sparse and sad but really stunning. Recommend if that’s your bag.

Have been awake at 6 or 6.30am every day for 3 weeks, even when I didn’t need to be and it has been extremely annoying. Today I slept until 9 and have done absolutely nothing all morning but read my book with the cat asleep on me. A delight

There are plenty of links between the anti-trans “women’s rights” movement & anti-feminist conservatism. And opposing abortion is a logical conclusion for a movement that says no, you should not have agency over your own body; no, you do not know best about yourself; no, you have no choice.

they're talking about youse on here

while I’m being cranky, access journalism needs to go. When the president does his “I’m alpha because I insulted you” thing somebody needs to fall on his sword and say “what the fuck is wrong with you, old man?” on a hot mic. the hero of the wizard of Oz is Toto.

In my corner of the bass-playing universe there was life pre- and post-Mani. He brought a liquid, melodic funkiness that EVERYONE copied. And when I finally met him he was exactly how you imagined him: joyful, generous, unstarry (& more of a star because of it) and wickedly funny. A life well lived

Horrible news about Mani. One of those guys absolutely everyone loves. Lovely funny stories everywhere about him.

Been working like a Trojan the last 3 weeks but I’ve just finished and *in the style of The Beastie Boys* NO WORK TIL TUESDAY

Try not to react to every madness Trump does but seeing him say “quiet, Piggy” to a woman who is at her work and no one responding to it at all is so unnerving

I don't use the word lightly, but this is really just evil isn't it. "Your identity makes us uncomfortable so be gone from public spaces." Fuck off.

I really enjoy having a half hour show on the go so it pains me that I don’t think I can drag myself to the end of season 2 of Nobody Wants This. It’s me, I’m nobody

Barely any traffic on the M80 this morning. Phoning in sick off the charts in Scotland this morning

Important

My instagram feed has a lot of pics of McTominay’s overhead kick captioned “hang it in The Louvre” but one guy has captioned it “hang it in Kelvingrove” and I really appreciate that

Would like to extend the delay repay scheme to include trains which have no heating when it’s fucking baltic outside

Just so: the plan is to lock the cabin doors to keep the passengers out, fly the plane into the ground and then walk out of the wreckage untouched to fancy jobs at Facebook and PWC. And if you don’t like it, fuck you.

The only fleeting moments I think it would be nice to live in America are always gig related

Really obvious that the monitoring, confiscation, valuing and sale of any items would cost more than the revenue generated of them. Grim rhetoric designed to be perfomatively cruel

Hey the Nazis did this to my grandparents so this sounds cool @teamlabouruk.bsky.social

For all I moan about the winter, I actually love the first properly cold dry day of the year where I need to wear a hat. Boosted this year by having a new winter jacket. Had such a clear idea of what I wanted and managed to find it AND at half price cos it’s last year’s. What a win

Haven’t seen a good film at the cinema since One Battle After Another and just found out we don’t get the new Park Chan-wook until late January. Feels unreasonable

Saw the trailer for that film where Elizabeth Olsen dies and has to choose which of her loves to spend the afterlife with. You can’t convince me there’s any tension in a decision about whether to spend eternity with Callum Turner or Miles Teller. Come on.

The Rest is Politics at the armadillo and some Australian DJ at the hydro leading to a very mixed crowd on the train from town to exhibition centre there

One of my favourite smells in the world is wood smoke. Have found a perfume that smells like a sexy wood fire and I could not be happier

Have decided I can no longer risk clicking on any videos in case they’re a stealth Beez in the Trap/What’s Up mashup

Puffling!

Went to see the third Now You See Me movie today. Was it bad? Yes. Did I have a good time? Absolutely. Having enjoyed neither Bugonia nor Die My Love in the last week or two, I was happily chowing down on this popcorn nonsense

Oh boy, I wonder how all these Trump/Epstein revelations will affect the deliberations for the FIFA Peace Prize 🙃

Joyce Carol Oates owned Elon so hard he's spent the last day posting about movies he hasn't seen in 15 years

Watched the first episode of Trespasses tonight. Always slightly concerned when it’s an adaptation of a book you loved but the casting is so good. Lola Petticrew is a perfect Cushla

Got these new trainers today but I can't get it out of my head that they look like fuckin DC Tosh Lines from The Bill

every generation loves Rumours. it’s fucking Rumours

In town at 9am on a Sunday just to get my eyebrows done is really making me regret my vanity *my eyebrow woman now only does one Sunday a month and this was the only appointment I could get

Have only watched the first two episodes of this but I’m really enjoying it. Aimee Lou Wood is so charming

First Christmas tree of the year. Broomhill. The west end isn’t what it used to be

Elon has never experienced this and neither have his biggest fans but now they can create these visuals with the help of a computermachine

"World's first potential trillionaire has killed 600,000 people, including 400,000 children" is the only headline that anyone should ever read about Elon Musk

I love that the Boston cop slide never got fixed and now people just willingly go down it in tribute. It’s basically a national landmark at this point

Fuck Joe Marler 😀

Alan, a worthy king 👑

Working and missing both the football AND Traitors. Happier about one of those than the other tbh

Defund Yorgos Lanthimos

the uk government is terrified of doing absolutely anything about this

Biggest endorsment for Mamdani comes so late