American sublime

I hate going to an estate sale in a nearly million dollar house and realizing the owner had terrible taste in books and art. I don’t want a bunch of Janet Evanovich and Hallmark gnomes, nobody does!

Rewatching any movie I watched as a kid as an adult is just a litany of “oh my gosh [insert actor] looks so young”

Both my teams are playing at the same time on two different streaming services. This is a world ending tragedy

A false claimant to the Burger Throne

June will be our 13th wedding anniversary and I’ve decided we need to go to a really nice steakhouse to celebrate this year

“Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again” from Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier

Accidentally pavloved my kids into only liking women’s sports, they have zero interest in baseball—ONLY softball

As a self imposed bedtime hardass it feels nice to stay up late to read a whole chapter of a book

Peruvian guy in Hawaii won by finding a submarine tour and casually flipping through the photos to a group of us, mouths agape

Americans get 1st Pope born in the United States, of course they'll treat this with profound reverence Americans: POPE LEO SAY GO KNICKS!!!

Cane’s sauce or Culver’s chocolate frozen custard

I still dream about the cabbage rolls in tomato sauce we had at a Ukrainian restaurant in Vancouver in 2024

Never a dull moment

The last thing you see before opening ChatGPT

wake up babe the white house is a six flags

Home :) kids home :) :) tired beyond belief :( :( :(

Imagining Bertie Wooster addressing someone as “my B in C”

Well would you look at that 😍

Currently watching DOUBLE INDEMNITY on a tiny smart phone screen. It’s what Billy Wilder would have wanted

A British couple traveled to China and complimented the Northeastern regional cuisine, comparing it to British food. Chinese Internet:

Married couples who Venmo each other publicly and liberally need to go to couples therapy

Finished two books on vacation and then couldn’t get any other ones to download. A 2026 tragedie

this hits so much harder now that he's skipping his son's wedding lol

Whoever invented the snorkel is a genius

Persuasion Jane Eyre Wuthering Heights

I’m sorry I only accept Taylor Lorenz-initiated discourses if she’s posting them on here. we must to stop relying on imported discourses from hostile foreign powers like X Dot Com to fuel our posting wars, as a matter of Bluesky national security and poster sovereignty

Cooked up in a lab to make me want to *reminded not to use suicidal ideation as a joke* uhhhhh scream www.nytimes.com/2026/05/19/b...

They brought out the nation’s slimiest toad to defend its slimiest policy yet. I love living in America

My MIL was trying to justify her use of ChatGPT to me, known and avowed hater. Literally none of the things she could name could not be answered already by a 30 second google search and maybe two paragraphs of reading

My ancestors hearing I got to see lightning at night flash through the thunderheads from 30,000 feet: you sure they’re not leading you to the pond to see if you’re a witch? Like, sure sure?

Also the next somebody says reparations for black people is a ridiculous idea, remind them that we have a reparations program for trying to overthrow the government

We use our grass lawn for sports more than every other house in our neighborhood and I still feel guilty about having it sometimes

I forgot how Mrs. Landingham died 😭

this truly is the thing that makes the united states exceptional, and right wingers hate it so much they want to destroy it

Passed the zen point of travel stress, something I wasn’t sure was actually possible. Things are going to happen or they will not happen and life goes on. C’est la vie and que sera sera and all that jazz

Remember PCR tests from Covid? The CDC doesn't have one for the Andes virus. I learned that a lab in Nebraska built and validated an Andes-specific PCR test in literal days in anticipation of receiving the American cruise ship passengers. My story for @wired.com: www.wired.com/story/race-t...

My carpal tunnel flares if I have a lot of deadlines hitting all at once, which then makes it difficult to hit said deadlines

The real value of social media is being able to post something like "The ass is the father of the legs" and potentially have multiple members of congress see it

I have incredibly lofty media goals for taking flights with my children in tow this weekend

The 7yo boy in our house spends a lot of time with girls older than him — his two older sisters and their friends. He’s currently the only boy joining soccer practice with a group of 14 girls ranging from 9-13 and they’re all gassing him up

I survived 4 concurrent soccer team schedules and all I got for it was a brutal watch and sock line tan

saw a truck for a company called Absolute Chimneys and I can’t stop saying that to myself as if I’m an English soccer announcer calling a free kick that sailed over the crossbar

To be known is to be loved

I think the moon is made of cheese

Decided that my actual dream job is reading articles about obscure shit and then sending them to people who would be interested

Lilas Joseph-Charles Franchère c. 1911