"The moons in Scorpio and I've never wanted cock more." -my friend 2024

Ope, I'm sad again. It's time to go onto zillow and doomscroll houses I'll never be able to afford

Still can’t believe they renamed it “Max”

Me and who?

I am In peak physical health. I'm in my prime. I am an apex predator -I say as I'm consistently dying for one reason or another-

Learned about Joan Of Arc the other day, she's pretty hard-core and might be my new hero #mythology #model #photography

Someone asked for my number but I said no, it's mine, it's my number, they gave it to me. Dummy

When a man tells me to smile more

(me in a cave 40,000 years ago) you're gonna draw another bull, huh. real exciting

Sometimes I take a break from being a silly fella, to be a serous gentleman #model #Photography

petition to legally shorten spaghetti to spaghet

First rule of rules club is actually more of a preamble to the codex that explains our founding principles and outlines the guiding ideas that inform the general tenor of rules club.

I crumbled

This is my character I like, post yours, and tag 5 moots :) @salltine.bsky.social @senshue.blsky.social @jonmcminn.bsky.social @insomneah.bsky.social @pidster.bsky.social Also, this is a chain email, reply and forward, or in 7 days It will come for you.

Now realizing I never officially broke up with my girlfriend on Club Penguin, happy 8 year anniversary boo ❤️

Always kiss your homies goodnight. BUT, let’s normalize kissing the homies good morning <3

Good evening gooners and goonettes

In space, nobody can hear you scream. They can see you ugly cry, though, so keep that in mind.

holding space 24 hour challenge

You stepped on something sharp It was my wit I'm on the floor Please step on me

I heard a joke about Orion's belt earlier I gave it 3 stars

When I say match my energy this is what I mean

My wife & I tried role play but we kept fighting over who would be Mr. Bean

doing a podcast where i cry for 1 hour

Lofi Beats to scream into the void

What if the light switch moaned when you flicked it

Yeah sex is great, but have you ever had the bartender say “There he is” when you walk in?

Just because you came from a shitty source doesn't mean you're bad, Just look at Arcane

When my friend showed me her pet chickens

Goodnight to everyone except that one girl who stole my Dark Magician card in middle school

Imagine if you could drink the blood directly out of Jesus’ hand hole

Midlife crisis? I'd have a crisis too if my life was mid

I think it's cool that Butter gets its own little penthouse in the fridge

You’re in her dm’s I've been assigned to a terrible fate These are unrelated

-Me with my tism-

Good afternoon :) (in a threatening way)

:)

I was going to tell you a time-travel joke, but you didn't like it :(

When I'm not being a goober on the net, I'm doing stuff like this #cyberpunk #model #Photography

giving each piece of laundry a little pat after folding so they know it’s okay to relax

-me taking any quiz ever- When in doubt, pick C :)