Dammit Duck Duck Go, a Facebook page isn't the fucking website.

I was there!

I’m in an outrageously foul mood.

The one Manchester used was also in Paddington 2.

Considering the parallels between Glasgow International Jazz Festival and Manchester Jazz Festival and amused to learn they both had one of these bad boys.

I'm not saying I've been hit with an attack of the sads AND a cold but I am off to tell Luke I'm his father.

I feel like TikTok should get rid of comments and just have a ‘that’s a skill issue’ button and an over 35’s feed.

As is becoming frequent, I'd lost interest in this before really finishing it but there is some fine tuneage from the land of the rising sun. Enjoy. music.youtube.com/playlist?lis...

This but the YouTube channel would be a selection of ‘Technology Connections’ videos. The ones about vintage toasters in particular.

Punt it in the nuts Mr Worf.

Worth mentioning that the view of Simon Dudley is shared by the construction industry, developers, architects and YIMBYs at large.

My hangover didn’t kick in until 11am and now I’m enraged at absolutely nothing. Like, unapproachable.

Yes, I know April Fools jokes aren't funny but a YouTuber I watch making a TWENTY-EIGHT MINUTE joke video and keep a straight face the entire time is pretty funny. And none of it was at anyone else's expense.

A more recent-ish one, but an all time banger

Sometimes I think there is no right in the world then I remember that ‘skeet’ never took off and I feel a little better.

LOL, as if the 42A, 42B and 42C buses didn’t all turn up at once.

It didn’t freak me out that there’s a hospital over the road from Southern Cemetery until I got an appointment to have surgery in it. Now it does.

Made my day so it has.

Teeth, teeth, teeth, TEETH, TEETH, TEETH

Thought I needed a big poo but it was actually just a big fart.

If I ever win an acting award I'm saying "I'm so honored to be nominated in this category, composed almost entirely of brilliant actors. I'm in awe of the work all but one of you did, we all know which one. Three of the four of you inspire me daily" and then never elaborating the rest of my life

Was going to apologise for any drunk posting I did last night but I went back through them and they weren't off brand at all. Also, still can't decide if the band were good or not.

Yes, yes I would.

Imagine if Bluesky was around during the first moon missions. People posting it's really offensive to them because they're allergic to cheese etc.

I think about her a lot because of this

Charming.

I think the reason I haven’t offed myself by now is that I know everything is my fault. So it’s my job to fix it. Plough on.

Chesterfield or Canterbury, depending on where Ellen wanted to live. She was, and is, ace. And I fucked it up.

While I’m drunk, let’s have an AMA.

I’m a sad drunk, apparently. Would I be a sad drunk if I had a kebab? Let’s find out.

Call me. I am a walking random idea generator.

I dunno, what do you think?

This band, however, sucks.

Here’s a nice moment: A couple I spoke to for precisely ten seconds last week just came to say hello. All I did was give them a chair.

I rarely drink wine but here we are. Cheers.

I don’t know.

German accent, surprisingly sexy.

The only good April Fools joke was when a library posted a headline saying “Study Shows Literacy Problems BC People Reply To Articles They Didn’t Read” When you clicked the link “lol April Fools there is no article. Tell no one” Then people who had not clicked the link argued about literacy all day.

Bring back Cord, we miss you.

April In Tokyo 2 delayed cos I’m going out. In the meantime, enjoy every YouTube memelord’s favourite song. music.youtube.com/watch?v=U0TX...

Pitch an unnecessary sequel: The Cook, The Thief, his Wife and her Lover versus Predator.

A woman on TikTok said a red flag in men was if they ‘fall over’. I’d fallen over ten minutes before reading that and twice since. I topple an excessive amount of times.

This is never not funny

I hear by declare today ‘April Foos Day’, so what’s your favourite foo? The song ‘Kung Fu’ by Ash? Foo Fighters? ‘To Wong Foo, Thanks for everything! Julie Newmar’?

I saw an ebay listing for a used stereo. As-Is: $1 - plays at full volume only. I thought to myself, I can't turn that down.

April Fools. youtu.be/D-sQiySX79g?...

Oh, I’m a fool every day of the year. Step up your game.

Decided I’d get back to working on my novel. It’s fucking shite. Ho hum, start again.

There’s a pair of leopard Louboutin heels on @missyotk.bsky.social wish list. I’ve made the matching leopard flogger to go with them. If someone wants to see her in the full set - put her in the heels. Quality always leaves its mark