Made it to where we need to be and got food and a High Noon, I still haven't wrapped up two giant work things though

Sorry pie haters I couldn’t hear you over the symphony of god’s light

Franz Ferdinand, art school cod psychologists that they were, imagined themselves as the turkey when they sang “take me out”

It took normie radio weeks to figure out what Tears is actually about and bleep all the “wet”s. Sabrina, queen of what should have been obvious raunch that flew over people’s heads anyway!

Mentally already in Miami cooking giant tubs of beige foods, but unfortunately physically on duty until 5 pm today

“Defective appointment” is the most hilarious wording while also being legally accurate.

New haircut, new RiNo wall

NFL broadcast going on and on about dyslexia awareness cleats, can we fast forward to the postseason pls

Packing again, groundbreaking

I do not use ChatGPT because I still remember when you had to go to your local at a specific time of day to listen to someone slurring conspiracy theories with utmost confidence and I will never allow Sam Altman to take that from me

In better news, I've melded the recipes of Ina Garten and Dan Pelosi and will be ready for my Thanksgiving menu contribution!

Target was unhinged but more in the school/craft supply areas than the groceries?

Back on my 🥯 ➡️ 🚌 ➡️ 🚈 bullshit!

the elementary school I drove past had a sign that said, “how many days should you be reading? 6-7” and I screamed at it

Seriously now. How stupid do you have to be to literally type "zip ties near me" into a search engine while planning your dumb crimes.

New haircut, new RiNo wall

Continuing to be horrified by the 🧊 activity in new places, including the Triangle, and reassured by the organizing that has sprung up to protect folx ❤️

if i had an arch nemesis id sneak into their home every time they were using a crockpot and turn it off

whenever the sun sets at 4:45 pm i open a window, lean out and yell "WRONG" as loud as i can. that usually buys me another hour or two of sunlight

NM pioneered putting shredded cheese on the outside of the taco shell and griddling it into a nice burn. It sounds unhinged, it is, and it is EVERYTHING

During this cloudflare outage, let me supply you with this wisdom of the ages: “single point of failure” can be sung to the tune of “all the single ladies”

I get to be home for a full week!

Home! I drove 840 miles in two days, somehow. 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

parents freed a hummingbird from a skylight with a coleus flower attached to a pole

I'm going to give you $2,000... emotionally.

And now I’m in Santa Fe. What I thought would be 2+ days between trips turned out to be 39 hours 😵‍💫

Took the 11 bus to pick up my next rental car, we are so multimodal babes

George Strait did it earliest and best, so appropriately you can stop listening after 0:08

More than warm enough for patio cocktails, ty global climate change?

What’s been super fun about my month of travel is combating identity theft at the same time 🙃

Joel Insurance sent us a Thanksgiving card? Mail is becoming unhinged

Someone remind me to buy souvenirs tomorrow

New Robyn single for my birthday!

Am I actually ready for this trip, 24 hours ahead of time, due to working with competent people? 😱

Urban planner here. If anyone - neighbor or otherwise - tells you this is an issue, you have the cover of all my years of professional practice to tell them to grow up and be fucking serious.

Open enrollment done, with almost four hours to spare!

Ugh that was a Monday

trump: birds go fast cabinet: yes mr president, sir, birds go very fast. trump: why don’t we use birds to pull airplanes? no one knows. maybe I’m the first person to think of it. cabinet: sir, mr president, sir, you are the smartest person in the world. trump: I believe it’s pronounced “worlm”

[putting up halloween decorations] spider who lives is my hallway: THIS IS GENTRIFICATION

I thought that Benson Boone single was pretty transparently about getting dirtbag pipe, yet retailers are like, yes, this is perfect for our holiday ad

Loving today's news that the mysterious "fedora man" outside the Louvre heist was actually a 15-year-old museum visitor who dresses like a 1940s French detective all the time, just because. apnews.com/article/louv...

pre-writing a devastating obituary for your enemy is god-tier hating of a kind you don’t often see anymore. renaissance haterism. beautiful stuff.

Laundry and pancakes day

The system is very much taped together and straining at the rips, but we made it home and not tooooo late. Thank you, TSA and air traffic controllers and all the people that make it work.

Trying to fly home before the ATC sitch gets bad 😬

Will we get home tomorrow? United will try in exchange for the money we gave them, but Secretary Road Rules is a fuckup, so 🤷🏻‍♂️

Dinner with my parents and biggest brother ☺️🥰

DC won this battle 🥪🫡

In such a good mood still. Thank you, electorate, for doing what you did on Tuesday!

Have been so absent from here but happy to say I’m in New Mexico this week and currently at the state’s best queer bar (Sidewinder’s in Albuquerque) 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🫡