You know things are bad when you’re looking forward to your colonoscopy for the nap ❤️

Foccacia me uppppp ❤️

You know things are bad when you’re looking forward to your colonoscopy for the nap ❤️

I’m not funny, you’re just depressed ❤️

Is there BreadSky? If not, I declare myself mayor of it. ❤️

down to foccacia ❤️

Five hours of sleep so I am bawling at this one

They should make a pickle scented candle 💚

chronic pain blows chunks ❤️‍🩹

kinda pissed that I have to write more Tylenol jokes ❤️

My dogs only love me for teeny bites of my foccacia ❤️

I have one press on that is literally STUCK to my skin AND IT HURTS so if anyone has suggestions to get it off without cutting my finger off that would be great❤️

How come all upstairs neighbors drop *so* many bowling balls? 💔

If you like pink enchiladas and getting caught in the rain 🎶

My dad put my mum's glasses on the dog

There is nothing funny about chonking

foccacia round 2 underway, babes ❤️

there is an old couple doing swing dancing on the ice rink and its so cute i think im gonna die 🥹

fish n chips smoothie ❤️

if ur constipated, go to Target or an Antique store and I promise ull be fine. ❤️

Nice shirt. For a clown to wear. To the toilet store

Have I made it yet?

Someone get Cici on a box of milk bones. A pup this cute deserves a brand deal. ❤️

soup is crazy one day someone said dinner will be wet

by goh there are levels to this

i love how when i grab my purse it rattles like a threatened snake bc of the giant bottle of advil i carry around with me everywhere

its puppy coffee time

My dentist always puts on Great British Baking Show for her patients which is genius tbh ❤️

No, Taylor Swift’s new album is good. It is you who is bad. ❤️

all dogs are muffins. if you don’t agree, plz unfollow me ❤️

she’s a ten but she watches “Is It Cake?” ✨

we are not obsessed enough with garlic knots tbh ❤️

This one!

Watched Midsommar and Hereditary while eating Pirates Booty. Obsessed. Need new recs now plz ❤️

I need some serious toe bean holding time rn ❤️

Ppl obsessing over Ophelia from Hamlet now but I already did that in middle school and had no friends and a retainer soooooo ❤️

Got tear away pants for this colonoscopy prep.

I wish there were car washes for humans ❤️

how many people do you think died in the dreamworks spirit horse movie when the horse explodes the train into the other train

public service announcement: the shrek crocs with the ears are on sale. ❤️

Original multiverse

speak truth to shower. if I stink I wanna know ❤️

College has taught me that by junior year you should not be gullible enough to purchase the “required” textbooks anymore

Best I Love Lucy episodes for me to watch while I cry and feel fat? ❤️