This World Cup we're being out-fanned on every level

Playing Mr. Brightside at the hydration break to a crowd that appears to be primarily composed of the team down 2-0 is a heck of a choice.

I don't think FIFA refs are biased against specific countries, only against all that is beautiful, good, and pure that flickers briefly into existence in this fallen world.

drake in attendance to watch cr7

We live in a post-side world.

Na na Na na na na Fuuuuuuuuuuck you Good bye (Ronaldo)

Okay, someone in Los Verdes Slack called Spain/Austria "El Hapsburg Clasico", and I'm dying.

Based on this groundbreaking analysis we predict Canada will beat Morocco.

That is an approach to prostelyization I had never considered. Look for the Society of St. Pius X to start endorsing global warming.

There are an equal number of hydration stations at Q2 Stadium, for 20k people, most of whom are drinking beer from concessions, AND IT STILL IS TOO FEW.

Does the thought of no Balogun make you break out in a...

Alito says that goal violates the original intent of offsides

Without Balogun next match the US may just be shooting blanks.

Before you get all hyped, that kid in the ref uniform thought it was a red card.

Update: Baloguns mat have faulty safeties.

Pretty sure there was a player in this tournament not given a red card for a more serious/similar play 🤷🏻

I was worried about only being up 1-0, and now I'm REALLY worried. Also not thrilled we lose Balogun next match.

i have one less touch in the box than bosnia and herzegovina COMBINED

Fuck me, now we've got Steiner Math in this game.

fun fact: Balogun in Yoruba basically means "general" or "commander" but most literally translates to "war dad"

How did this game turn into a CONCACAF qualifier, probably in San Pedro Sula?

I support the 2nd Amendment that all citizens may have a Balogun.

I wonder what the name of the stadium is. It looks like a Levi's logo covered in Dollar Tree tablecloths, but FIFA would never be that cheap.

‼️ Multiple pitch invaders on the field during Seattle's World Cup match between Senegal and Belgium. The group are wearing shirts promoting an online crypto casino operating in the "Autonomous Island of Anjouan". The site has previously partnered with Andrew Tate.

If Mexico don't warm up in Maradona jerseys with gloves on, what are we even doing.

You left it all on the field. Salute and respect to you DR Congo. 🇨🇩⚽️✋🏿🫡

England said to be distraught that bland food is illegal in Mexico. Their private chef is on the border watch list.

if congo pull this off i want the british museum empty by midnight

It appears Paraguay are the new tactical pioneers - every game since has featured their tactical plan.

Forgive the picture of my TV but this is an absolutely wild World Cup fact

Hard to imagine anything less Christ-like than this.

You mean like that Jewish carpenter dude and his fishermen peeps?

Hey, it's Brek Shea!

The Spanish pronunciation of "Francia" keeps making me think I hear "Franzia" and I think the French would be more offended by being called boxed wine than any other insult.

How does Erling Holland not play for the Netherlands? #dadjoke

Justice Alito just voted for mandatory pissing on the Statue Of Liberty. In his weird opinion, he wrote, "She's female, and she's a foreigner."

I understand SCOTUS, know who they are, & by all rational accounts it feels so naive to say: "I can't believe 4 of 9 justices said the Constitution doesn't protect birthright citizenship." And yet, I can't believe 4 of 9 justices just said the Constitution doesn't protect birthright citizenship.

One might say he's Cruyff Turnt

Monterrrreeeyyyyyyy Give me goals Distract me from life's burning coals Pausa di hidratcion changes games Monterrrreeeyyyyyyy Give me goals

"Siri, define Stockholm Syndrome."

Bielsa has been spotted fleeing for the Paraguayan border.

FULL BAGGIO