here is a list of extremely important things: * being kind to others * being kind to yourself * making little noises * curling up cat-like in a warm corner * fighting for the things that matter * letting go scarred-over hurts * creating art * creating shitty art * celebrating wins with friends

it's so funny how every tech ceo is like this unironically

hey uh can i get a Woke 2 with a side of fries? and uhhh a climate stalin, all to go

From @acyn.bsky.social (posted on X) "Reporter: Do any of you have a favorite animal? Child: My favorite one is a gold snake that can move. It has gold eyes, and it has a super-duper tail… Reporter: Mr. Mamdani, the second question for you. Mamdani: Yes. It’s also the golden snake."

i will never vote for Gavin Newsom even if by some unholy confluence of events he ends up as the dem nominee. a vote for Newsom is a vote for purely self-serving evil

the Spectator accidentally recycled a subhed from a previous day’s article about Tehran

horrible goose gf × bloody magpie bf

this happened to me. rip lozza, you're nah yeahing with the angels now

i love to wander innocently into pitch-black spaces. i am going to seduce a Grue if it kills me

i bet you could have such a good nap in the void between universes

we must pass an additional $200 billion of funding to outfit the Omelas-child torturers with body cameras

in 2026 it is illegal to not do crimes

A spectre is haunting Europe—the spectre of The Scary Ghost.

inventing a drug that gets you high

bro, this caveat is emptor as hell

reading about the stuff ICE is doing makes me want to say the sorts of things that will get my account banned in 0.2 seconds.

i love moopsy. i would die for moopsy. if you are against moopsy you are my enemy and i shall not relent

becca scan'tbechoosers coded characters

I used to love computer it was my friend. Now I have hate in my heart

every right-wing pundit is like "caring about sex trafficking pedophile billionaires is woke moral panic hysteria CRT DEI political correctness gone mad. the *real* urgent crisis is this trans teenager playing hockey with her friends"

anyway i have got to get to sleep. be kind to each other & yourselves my dears 💜

the reasonable person might presume that larger, more consequential acts by wealthier people face would more scrutiny, but this couldn't be further from the truth such acts face not just less *proportionate* scrutiny, but less in absolute terms impunity is the principal luxury of wealth

getting some real "the purpose of a system is what it does" vibes off this union of pedophilia & capitalism

it's un-fucking-believable* that there are more rigorous checks on somebody getting a shitty, inadequate disability payment than there are on whether a powerful political or diplomatic candidate is a pedophile *actually easily believable

personally i don't like it how the right are all leaning into pedofascism and the centre is settling on "well maybe just a little pedofascism, as a treat", and this seems to be true across the whole anglosphere

doing this to everyone implicated in the epstein files tomorrow

it would rule so hard to be a politician. every day you get to tweet something like "police violence has gone too far. i am introducing the EAGLE Act, which forbids police from shooting anyone they don't want to kill" and rake in donations

there are cathedrals somewhere for those with eyes to squint

the time of the great dipping is nigh

we have *got* to invent new kinds of horrible oozes to lower our enemies into

Necessity is the mother of invention. Whimsy is the other mother of invention. they're lesbians

What Da™ brand tuna

the difference between the ruling class and serial murderers in the UK is that the ruling class will be talking about tolerance and dignity the whole time they're shanking you to death

remembered this existed and started laughing uncontrollably again

Man: Doctor, lately I've just been feeling worthless, like the lowest scum on the planet. Doctor: Hm, I know what you should do. Piece of shit loser Pagliacci is in town tonight, go laugh at him. Man: listen here you little shit

pagliacci was really upset at first, but after the fifth doctor suggested he treat his depression with a clown show he just found the whole thing morbidly funny, a private little joke between him & the uncaring universe

when i was having the mri i kept thinking that the experience would work surprisingly well as ASMR if you didn't have to sit in a plastic coffin the whole time

People gotta fuckin stop doin this. I won't vote for Gavin Newsom. Gavin Newsom will lose. I'm saying it now so y'all have time to listen, tho you never do. But nah I ain't voting for diet fascism just because he has a D. Candidates have to do what we want to get elected, there's no fealty here.

i can't believe i am the first woman to ever be sleepy during daytime

it would rule so hard to be a politician. every day you get to tweet something like "police violence has gone too far. i am introducing the EAGLE Act, which forbids police from shooting anyone they don't want to kill" and rake in donations

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

🌿

modern movies think they're too good to do a silly scene transition. fools, you will never surpass the excellence of the clock wipe

Elon Musk could redeem his reputation a bit with just one teensy little murder-suicide

don't think Trump will be on time but Elon just might. you can do it Elon, show the world your low taxes!

elon musk give the people what they want. it'd be so easy, easier than not doing it. so easy you could slip into it like a warm bath

sorry everyone. my predictions once again did not come to pass

there are two, maybe three things Elon Musk could do tomorrow to make the world a better place, here's hoping he does all three!

oh, you think that all cops are bastards? well that's not *my* libbed experience, leftist scum

appropriating all the stolen wealth of billionaires isn't just what's best for the workers, but best for the billionaires too. their riches impoverish them in all ways but one