On the left is an Onion headline from March. On the right is Reuters, today.

It's a good day to vote NO on 5 fascist amendments.

Now that the PL is awful to watch I wonder if @espnbillc.bsky.social can write a primer on which Bundesliga teams to become a fan of for next season.

Pales in comparison to the brain aneurysms the writers had.

nerdy niche subreddits are the some of the best social media we have left

Gas Station Price Sign Using Scientific Notation

too many stupid people have money; that's why I'm launching protein cigarettes

Not the song I would have chosen but it does qualify.

If you read them from the beginning they're the words of a dog who desperately wants you to come over because they've seen a frisbee

if you are looking for something to watch this weekend -- if, say, one or more of your beloved local sports teams are in danger of being swept out of the playoffs at home -- i very much recommend a binge of Reggie Dinkins type-click-type.ghost.io/please-enjoy...

Absolute loser shit. Do you really want to keep these institutions? Do you really think they matter? Then find a way to make them accountable to the will of the voters before they lose the thin patina of legitimacy they have left.

Can't wait for all the "Why does no one want Arsenal to win the CL?" columns that are gonna come out.

My parents waited in line for 2 nights like they were getting a new PlayStation to get a 12% loan.

Funniest show on tv now. Everyone should watch. Really really funny.

It’s always “you’re autistic” and never “thank you for telling me everything you know about mega man”

Josh Dasilva back!!!! Great to see him after being out injured for 28 months.

get in loser we're getting Reconstruction right this time

Crazy to think this week’s two semifinals could produce a combined 9 (!!) goals

Thank you PSG and Bayern for reminding us that football can be fun. Amazing content.

Ted Lasso meets his hardest challenge yet, WOMEN!!?!! How do they work.

a ballroom has a core strategic weakness: the man in the back saying “everyone attack”

Eating crawfish. Again. 🦐🦐🦐

they're having a block party at the shooter's house rn

I'm sorry but I think it's kind of funny that we've all reached "Yeah I guess someone tried to get him again whatever"

kash patel says the fbi will leave no stone unturned, from the postgame locker room of the los angeles kings game tomorrow night to the jelly roll concert a few days later in memphis tennessee

See you all at the Correspondents’ Dinner!

Hahahaha jets

Never forget that time Sam Neill gave a quote about murder that was so beautifully kabonkers, we all assumed it was a Clickhole bit initially

First couple of chips your brain reacts poorly but by the end, I kind of loved them.

ONE BOTTLE AFTER ANOTHER

Wow what a miss

The timeline is going to be so conflicted when west ham hosts arsenal in a few weeks.

oh man. iranian state media reporting that the strait of hormuz is open, but only to those who can answer the blind old man’s riddles three. not a long term solution, to say the least.

Schrodinger's Strait of Hormuz

I’m not proud of it but if Forrest Gump started talking to me on a bench I’d have left

Exactly one year ago today:

After thinking it over. I think the championship version of Spurs would be super fun. Kinksy, Danso, Deki, Maddison, Tel, Bergvall, Gray, Odobert, Moore, Devine, Donley, Yang, Olusesi, Melia, Lankshear, Souza, Rowswell, Byfield, Phillips, Barnet-Williams, Solomon, Takai, Dorrington.

What the fuck is geese

this site has gotta get better at sports because i have not seen this 500,000 times on my TL when it is one of the craziest goals i have ever seen

Or what about this angle??

'the pope is an American because the Vatican is out to get me' is terrific because it's both a thing an insane person would think and also probably true.

Arteta preparing Arsenal to play the worst football anyone has ever seen next weekend vs Man City.

jd vance negotiating with Iran

What a great photo just added on the NASA Johnson Flickr page www.flickr.com/photos/nasa2...

There is no need to be upset

Thinking about a sandwich rn

Schrodinger's Strait of Hormuz

NOW: B52 bombers are literally in the air on their way to Iran and hundreds of thousands of Iranians are in the streets waving flags and surrounding bridges & power plants. Difficult to imagine this has any precedent in modern warfare. (🎥 Al Jazeera)