"for the last step, find two miniature clones to levitate the upper half onto the lower half"

Lauren, guilting me: PLease I just want to walk around home sense, I just want to walk around a store that isn't mine PLEEEEEASE Lauren 10 minutes later:

my fav when im standing in my small business & you mention a corporate competitor. thnks. yes. good.

bout to get banned from the brewery unthemed vinyl night

Cuomo Announces Plan To Govern New York City As Independent https://theonion.com/cuomo-announces-plan-to-govern-new-york-city-as-independent/

My wife is the best 🌝

i haven't seen a capital one commercial in a while. maybe they could sneak one in between pitches here

I hate baseball and don't care about baseball but I can't deny that this is compelling and I'm gonna stay awake till it's over

As an unbiased viewer of a world series, I think it's total BS you can just say "nah, you don't count" to the best player on the other team. Just telling Mcdavid to stay on the bench for OT. Baby behavior

I get the sense that if i come home without pizza there will be consequences

Best sign I saw today

You can easily block the official MAGA government accounts here. Do not engage them. Do not give them what they want.

as someone who could not care less about baseball, I might as well be reading an entirely different language on the tl

AUTHORITIES, AUTHORITIES!!!

THIS BAR HAS THE FUCKIN PRESTIGE ON, 20/5 STARS!!!

this was a good show to watch but God damn I forgot how much of network late night is COMMERCIALS

what I showed the barber vs what the barber apparently saw

lotta totally sincere rapture believers out here not turning off autopay on their bills or giving their soon to be unneeded possessions away! which epistle is the one where Paul says to hedge thee thy bets on the Lord, in case thy math was shitty

Promare sure is a timely watch

I wrote about the leveling and deranging effects of the Trumpist snitchscape, and the awful content creation imperatives governing this awful moment. defector.com/the-united-s...

first customer of the weekend in my independent import hobby store: "you guys aren't affected by tariffs, right?" sir I cannot imagine a way you could have guessed more incorrectly

man oh man "good things go"is perfect. can't believe Linkin Park actually came back

with Centrism, which is less a politics than it is a neurosis about seeming smarter than people on the Left. In order to seem smart, you just second-guess obvious conclusions -- "Does this seem good? Well, not so fast. Does this seem bad? There could be another side." &c.

every time I start and endgame fight in clair obscur and Rain from the Ground starts playing I'm like OH FUCK THIS ONE'S SERIOUS and then I'm sad when I win cause the song goes away again

Went to Taco Bell and AI took my order, made a mistake on the first item, and a real person had to jump in and fix it and take the order anyway. @internethippo.bsky.social remains undefeated

my favorite thing about rhythm games is that they expose everyone's weird individual tick they do when they realize the track is a way out of their depth. turns out we all have the "I'm failing and I know it" tell

Otakon day 1 done

Lauren is the goodest person to everyone around her that I've ever known, but also she specializes in doing things that make me say "you shouldn't have done that"

finally put effort into getting shampoo / conditioner that match my hair type and somehow it just made my hair completely straight. Aussie lied about these amazing curls ☹️

play Clair Obscur

driving SUVs is for braindead humans, this Durango in front of me just put 21 gallons in the tank. deranged

once you become a millionaire you should be forced to work a summer as a gas station attendant in new jersey. this repeats for every additional million you make. This would solve every problem in the country

I'm a Republican which means I want small hands-off government that can't do anything except extort every single political adversary and force them to do everything I want or risk having the entire apparatus of the institutions turned on them

I think if my sport allowed the gametime to continue ticking the while the other team celebrated scoring, I would become a murderer

Whether it's Hillary Clinton wearing pantsuits or Donald Trump drawing naked women in a letter he sent to a pedophile, both candidates took a provocative approach to women's attire.

since making this post our "point of contact" has changed twice and each time they try to call me mid work day to "schedule and introductory meeting" as if I won't have to give the same info to a brand new person in 3-5 weeks

i'm not on IG enough to be desensitized to the caption culture and sometimes it really is gripping to read through these

Great wallpaper in the sushi joint bathroom tonight

no one has ever betrayed anyone as much as my wife has betrayed me in Uno this weekend

LOL - dashare.zone ADMIN

what athlete's expression will stay with you the rest of your life?

HELP - dashare.zone ADMIN

I feel like all the world's problems started when I didn't wake Lauren up to watch Sharks Knights game 7 😔

Staying up late? My favorite Being awake when birds start chirping? I am now homicidal

Clair Obscure has: -incredible story -unique and interesting characters -amazing music -engaging TURN-BASED combat -top tier voice acting -just the absolute most dog shit platforming segments to ever exist in a game

A real metric of how much I'm aging is that the acoustic performer at the winery on a Saturday is playing covers of all the emo songs from when I was in high school 🫠

TNT, I promise I will never text FLAG to 41444

I'm obsessed with clair obscur but this point stands: Sekiro remains the only game I've obsessively played where you can't be a hot woman

Natalie from Severance is the scariest person I've ever seen. If I met that woman in real life I wouldn't sleep for a week