How do we get steven miller to take up boxing

When your recycling is full and the next pickup is after Christmas

Me: I don’t see the appeal of boxing TV: OK but what if it’s professional boxers savagely brutalizing influencers Me:

Happy "No Fewer Than 10 Out of Office Responses To Every Group Email" season to all who celebrate

Ah, the week after the first snowfall of the season. When the air is crisp, the mornings still, and the emails from the school district about proper morning dropoff procedure increasingly strident...

Rob Reiner either made your favorite movie, or made somebody you know’s favorite movie. If you’re a Californian, he’s also part of the reason you or your friends can get married. He has changed more lives for the better than this asshole commenting on him ever did.

The new Knives Out movie is good. Two takes: *It works because Blanc is not the dominant character. *It will get hate from the right because the worst protagonists are right wing coded, but the core themes - power of faith, community, institutions - are actually quite conservative

He's also responsible for raising all the money that paid for bringing Hollingsworth v. Perry & even more importantly Bostic v. Schaefer, which created the circuit split that forced SCOTUS to take on Obergefell v. Hodges. The role he played in American marriage equality cannot be overstated.

Spinal Tap taught me that comedy has to be rooted in love, Harry and Sally taught my oldest to adore Rom Coms, The American President is my wife's fave, and my father always says 'Have fun storming the castle!' every time he leaves our house. We're not doing great right now. #RIP

Mel Brooks having to bury Rob Reiner is against all laws of nature and I’m not ok about it

Happy Hanukkah to everyone from your friends at Mission: Rejected!

In case you have never seen this.

I see cats are writing for NatGeo now

Sam Altman: hey I made a machine that stole literally all your stuff in order to make CSAM of your child actors, sometimes it encourages people to kill themselves Disney: Holy shit here's a billion dollars Altman: the machine loses more than that each week but thank you. Soon it will become god.

"I'm disappointed in Michael Crawford' isn't a thought that I expected to have in 2025, but here we are

Nopetre Dame

If you see John Roberts in person, be sure to tell him he’s a worse Chief Justice than Roger Taney (pronounced “tawny”). That’s a nerd burn that will hit him where it counts.

Red Lobster never released a commercial with a jingle that went “Shrimply having a wonderful Fishmastime.” That’s why they went bankrupt.

the Nobel committee should create a new prize called the Nobel Prize for Sucking and award it to him so he can say he has a Nobel prize and shut the fuck up

#horror #memes

Massive shoutout out to whoever handles the Royal Canadian Air Force’s social media account. They responded to every single comment on their already very solid Trans Day of Remembrance post and they responded like this…

Hey all, The Onion is accepting applicants for our writing, video and graphics fellowships. Fellowships last six months, pay well, and provide full benefits. You can apply at theonion.com/fellowship.

#Tennessee Vote, AFTYN BEHN Today 12/2/25 Vote, #TN07

Fortnite has more than dance moves… Immigrant rights organizers are helping players use the metaverse game to learn how to defend against ICE agents in IRL

600 ICE agents were supposed to be deployed to Canal Street. Hundreds of New Yorkers gathered instead. Quick summary by me:

"We're actors; we're the opposite of people!" RIP Tom Stoppard

Good morning to anyone who caught the 'Spies Like Us' reference in Stranger Things S5E1 and no one else

📣 New Podcast! "601: Motions Eleven" on @Spreaker #action #adventure #comedy #courtroom #law #order #spy

This is the first Thanksgiving for Sophie & Colin Hortman without their parents, Minnesota state Rep. Melissa Hortman and Mark Hortman who were assassinated along with the family dog in an act of political murder. National guards troops were not deployed to the state in response.

At midnight EST.... we're back :-) @missionrejected.bsky.social #MRSeason6

American journalists should be so bold!

Look, I got the Halloween decorations down before Thanksgiving, frankly I don't know what more anyone can ask of me

When getting notes on the initial mix of an audio drama episode, it really is amazing how many of those notes begin "It sounded fine on headphones, but in the car..."

Genius

Part of being a screenwriter born in the 70s is simply accepting that 'Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid' is part of your artistic DNA and that's a GOOD thing

MTG is resigning from Congress because she has agreed to be my business partner in a cart selling the world's first alcoholic hot dogs

I don't know how Caleb Deschanel did it but no movie ever looked like 'The Natural' and no movie ever will

After that meeting, I'm never playing poker against Zohran Mamdani.

Mamdani just played Trump without sacrificing immigrants, Muslims, workers, or the LGBTQ. Trump did his transactional charm offensive, Mamdani countered without compromising. He won big and this is the man the Democratic Establishment still won't embrace. What more do people need to see?

I haven't laughed this hard at political news since Four Seasons Total Landscaping, thank you Zohran

big bugs bunny getting elmer fudd to marry him vibes in the white house currently i see

there are about a million different incentives for Zohran to play this the way he did, it's very funny that there's basically no reason for Trump to behave this way except that 1. he loves celebrities 2. is obsessed with being liked in New York City and 3. was clearly charmed... and that worked

One thing that's 100 percent true of writing in all its forms: the script/book/play/whatever sucks until it doesn't. It's not a gradual slope. It's horse dung every step of the way until it's showable.

No one has ever lived their best life to the extent that post-NFL Marshawn Lynch is living his

If you receive an illegal order, you have a duty to disobey. This isn’t controversial. A President calling for the execution of anyone who reminds service members of this oath is showing us why the duty to disobey illegal orders is so important in the first place.

If a reasonable person would know the order is illegal, you MUST refuse. Obedience is not absolute, duty to the Constitution is. Oath is to defend the Constitution not a person Yes. U.S. service members have a legal and moral obligation to disobey an illegal order. Not just the right. The DUTY.