Dicklosure Day

I regret to inform all of you that in 1992 Nabisco put out a SnackWell's crewneck sweatshirt that is just pure 🔥

Dear Flight Attendants, No eggnog? Just say so. NO NEED FOR THAT LOOK

Even for an observational comedian (the scientifically least funny type of comedian), Josh Johnson isn't funny. 🤷‍♂️

Rudy can suck a fuck all the way to whatever hell he's headed to.

My man just invented Microsoft Bob again. www.reddit.com/r/interestin...

I CAN’T

Well, pardon me if I don't go out of my way to mourn the "Obama will bring 1000 years of darkness" stretch jeans salesman today. I'll take a shit later to make up for it.

none of our trail or process cameras captured the meteor this morning but Nicole did offer this artist rendering.

Have I used a CPAP machine every night for over a decade, without anything ever going wrong? Yes. Do I still think about a wayward spider being puffed up into my sinus cavity like an angry little NERF dart every time I don the head gear? Also yes.

March 7, 2026: 1281 US confirmed measles cases

Wow. Powerful political cartoon by: Carlos Latuff - Mondoweiss.

Last week, I was asked whether I supported strikes on Iran. My position remains the same.

Plebs League pamphlet Do Your Own Thinking, 1930s

When an egg cracks from the inside, it's life. When an egg cracks from the outside, it's food.

You're parsing your dumb thoughts into double-spaced bullshit. You're repeating the first bit so it looks like a beautiful poem, full of meaning. You're just a moron writing a bad haiku.

Oh, good. Maybe the aliens will explain to us why the Epstein files haven't been released yet.

I must confess that I love music and sometimes put a song on repeat all day but I literally could not recite the lyrics to you afterward. My brain only cares about the vibes.

Artist: GoodBearComics.com

Erika Kirk out there trying to make the Epstein files when they already stopped accepting applications. 😭

Hmm, I guess all those "mountains" looked like "molehills" because they were child-sized.

He doesn't believe any of his own "first paragraph of a Wikipedia article" bullshit. He's copes with his inability to be the "hero" his mommy told him he could be by weaving imaginary realities where he can escape from all the people who make fun of him for being a narcissistic fake-ass lil bitch.

Ceremonial tea in the orchard with the boys, venti chai latte with the toys.

The gun lobby has the chance to do something really funny. youtube.com/watch?v=VEVk...

Everyone likes to look at the dots. But when I connect them, people scream. Often because when I'm done connecting the dots, they're looking at a portrait of someone they know.

Vibe shift

if the Mechanical Turk is freaking you out, I'd encourage you to think: what will it mean if chess-playing automatons wish to become landed gentry? what will their coat of arms look like? are chess-playing automatons considered male for the purposes of primogeniture?

It’s great when Elon Musk fans try to help

They should let Scott Adams' ex-wives continue Dilbert like it's the Dune books or whatever

This week's news has been horrible , but at least tons of people are now familiar with the flag of Greenland, a solid top 5 GFOAT. ❤️🇬🇱❤️

If you can't be a good role model, at least try to be a great example.

Here is the full CECOT torture prison segment that CBS tried to kill to appease Trump. Please spread it far and wide. YouTube: youtu.be/F81WnOyDXD4?... Substack: open.substack.com/pub/qasimras...

That's it, I'm never voting for Bill Clinton or ANY of the Jacksons ever again.

I LOVE WHEN PEOPLE TAKE PICS OF THEIR PETS WITH OUR CAMPAIGN MERCH!!!!!

Student Who’s Been In 3 School Shootings Starting To Think This Might Be About Him https://theonion.com/student-whos-been-in-3-school-shootings-starting-to-think-this-might-be-about-him/

Everyone knows how this works. Government cuts military folks a "look the other way while I rape the Constitution you swore to protect" check for 1700 bucks, then Jeep Wrangler and Camero interest rates will climb the exact same amount to compensate.

As long as we're suggesting stupid unrealistic shit that undermines "the movement", I think the left should promote old school struggle sessions in the workplace that result in the public punishment of antisocial behavior, preferably with baseball bats.

What a terrible evening to be literate.

"If we were the last peoole on earth, would you date me?" Is the wrong question. "If we're were the last people on earth, which deep underground military base do you want to break into first?" Is the correct question.

Yah, the world is crashing and burning down around us, but how's the Wanda-Jamal index performing? Spoiler: Still making gains, year after year.