Mass Effect Legendary Edition is $5.99 on US PSN buff.ly/mw4XS2x XBL buff.ly/GyiFzCx Steam buff.ly/ShkOKu4

Should I go to the gay bar after the Fairfield county hip-hop show tonight or should I throw myself into traffic

the album lysol by melvins 1992

when you’re trying to evade capture after WWII ends:

FRIDAY

in the lab trying to turn a regular penis into a sucked penis

Everything I know about "Wicked" has been from secondhand internet sources and I'm keeping it that way

I think it's neat how I can just bring na beers to band practice now

Elmer Fudd is in bed with a beautiful woman, but she's sad. She says she feels all alone in the world. Elmer says, "The treatment is simple. The great bunny Bugs is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up." And the woman bursts into tears. Says, "But Elmer...I am Bugs Bunny."

Can't fall back asleep, guess I have to go see family again

Bluesky has a lot of people unironically posting like this tweet.

Rod Stewart. Weird haircut raspy little elf man. But he's horny as all get out and it kind of works. Like if you walked in on him jacking off while flicking his tongue you wouldn't be surprised you'd just be like yeah thats about right. Not sure what this post was going to be about originally

the only difference between fandom and findom is a single vowel

I'm the last real boy on grindr

more like holodeck fornicate, amirite?....😁

Is this cheese grater conscious? Many users feel they're talking to a real person. Scientists say it's time to consider whether they're onto something.

Come to my birthday party next Saturday. Do shots with my uncles. Make out with me. Listen to loud music. Etc

we need an internet hague to hold everyone who made google unusable responsible

Maria Cumbath Brazil, Cemetery Records, 1799-2024

Wow that's a first!

Forgot about Yale/Harvard weekend until I left the house today. So... I think I need to go out after work

Every day of his miserable life Trump is shuttled between rooms by a series of viziers who all look like a racist version of Dobby to talk to women who all got the same surgery to look like Skyrim NPCs and here comes this communist who look…he look so beautiful

Pissing out my penis again

Friday

Bottomia MacManus United States, Census, 1950

Just heard new Videodome mixes. No vocals or synths done yet and it's already the best thing we've ever done

good.

OPERATION EIGHTEEN NAKED COWBOYS IN THE SHOWERS AT RAM RANCH

Arm day followed by working on 4.5 hours of sleep

Earnest Boner www.findagrave.com/memorial/150...

The DJ at my job is out of control with the volume and bass frequencies tonight and it's making me bloodthirsty

Practicing semen retention by clenching my butthole

Got the bounces to the instrumental tracks to my band's new EP approximately ten minutes before I punched into work tonight. This is about to be the longest seven hours of my life.

we all got that one homie who's drawn in a different art style

Whenever I catch myself thinking,“If I could create and sell music-related devices or merch like this, I could probably make a ton of money,” I remind myself I’m first and foremost an artist making the music that goes inside them. Moments like that make me smile and realize I’m not a businessperson.

Since I started lifting I have this funny problem where many of my shirts are either tight (sexy) or Too Tight (chafey) and finding out the difference has been fun

The drawback to having a room full of trinkets and doodads is that every time I make a sudden movement I'll hear something fall over and have to scramble to figure out what it was

*supportive boyfriend who forgets the names for things voice* Yeah baby let me know if you need any help recovering from your pussy installation

Pope Leo XIV issues statement following lunch with trans women: “we discussed many things. I am now a fan of professional wrestling.”

Umm technically he’s called Netanyahu’s Monster

Trying to hit on a tech guy like "yeah that'll make your software into hardware"

This is what I call my hole

Singlehandedly waging a losing war on shelf space

It has Begun

I love death metal and cock

FRIDAY

William Suxon Hancock England, Births and Christenings, 1538-1975